


All Jumbled Up

by sagwalli



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, High School, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Seulrene, Sexuality Crisis, Unrequited Love, joyri - Freeform, sungjoy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-07-08 10:12:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 41,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15928292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sagwalli/pseuds/sagwalli
Summary: The popular Kang Seulgi is gay. Really gay. Her best friends, Wendy, Joy, Yeri, and Irene don't really know until suddenly, Seulgi comes out, leaving her friends in shock. Nobody is more shocked than Irene, who isn't sure how to react. More than that, she doesn't know how to feel. The school (most of it, anyway) is surprisingly accepting when they find out. Others, not so much.Things get awkward. Things get better. And they just keep getting more confusing.Everything's all jumbled up.





	1. Unexpected

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> I thought it would be interesting for one to come out of the closet and for the other to not even realize she's in the closet until later. Irene will eventually realize she's bisexual. I wanted to also portray some of the feelings that come with coming out and write a fic where Irene realizes her feelings just for the sake of realizing her feelings, meaning this fic will be slow-burn.
> 
> If you want, check out my fic How Could I Fall for You. It's a spy au fic based off the classic gay movie D.E.B.S. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! You can get author updates and more from my Tumblr or Twitter @sagwalli.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi comes out and nobody expected it, least of all Irene.

"I'm gay."

Those few words hung in the air, suspended for all to stare at. Some marveled, some looked on horrified, and others were just plain surprised.

Irene wasn't sure exactly how her face looked, her resting bitch face a widely known phenomenon, but she was sure that inside her mind, a gay panic button had revealed itself and she, being the gay panic she is, smashed the gigantic rainbow button to her heart's content. 

_Wee woo! Wee woo!_

Sirens blared in the distance for only Irene. She knitted her brows and stared at her best friend. Seulgi.

Seulgi was gay? 

Irene wasn't surprised, per say, but she certainly hadn't expected the girl to announce it to the school. Well, announce it loud enough for anyone near to hear and no doubt spread like wildfire until even the principal's aunt's cousin's hoobae had found out about it. Irene continued rolling the scrap piece of paper in between her pointer finger and thumb.

"Are you going to say something?" Seulgi sounded shy. She looked at the ground and held her left bicep.

"Wow..." Wendy's mouth formed a big "O" and slowly formed more words. "Now you can join those two!"

"Yah, unnie!" Yeri smacked Wendy's arm.

"You can join us, all right," Joy said with a wink.

"You can shut up!" Yeri smacked Joy's arm.

Seulgi, playing with her fingers, began to warm up, seeing that her friends were reacting quite nicely. However, there was still one person left.

"Hyun-ah?" Seulgi said her name carefully, the fragile object rolling off her tongue and falling out of her mouth with a plop before shattering on the floor, bringing Irene back to reality. Irene blinked.

"What?"

"Are you going to say something?" Seulgi balled her shirt in one fist. No doubt there would be wrinkles later. Irene made a mental note to iron the shirt out for Seulgi later.

"Um..."

"Please say something."

Seulgi's pleading eyes dug into Irene's heart, squeezing hard. Wendy, Yeri, and Joy stood to the side bickering, leaving the two alone. Irene was at a loss for words. She didn't really know what to tell Seulgi. Hey, I'm happy for you? Good job? I'm so proud? Irene wasn't sure.

"Seulgi... I'm happy so proud of you."

Fuck.

Seulgi looked confused.

"I mean, I'm happy for you. And I'm proud. it must have taken a lot of courage for you to tell me, err, us." Irene cursed at her awkwardness. How could the school's sweetheart fall apart? Not even in front of a stranger, but just a friend.

"Ah... yeah." Seulgi relaxed. "I just felt like I couldn't hide it any longer, you know?"

"Yeah," Irene said automatically, before correcting herself, "I mean, no I don't know, but I know."

Seulgi laughed good-naturedly. Irene couldn't help but smile back. "Okay, Hyun. I'm glad you aren't mad at me."

"Mad?"

"Well, you weren't saying anything... I thought maybe you didn't want to be friends or something."

"Of course not, Seul! I could never." Irene smiled her best smile.

"Okay," said Seulgi happily, hugging Irene tight. "I'm so glad we're friends."

"Yeah," Irene agreed, her tone flat. "Friends."

Irene wasn't sure when the term began to feel heavy, like a burden she didn't want to carry. The word began to feel wrong, for reasons Irene didn't know. "Friends" pricked at her skin and made the hair on the back of her neck stand on end, poking up like meerkats from their burrows. When did it all begin?

Some underclassmen walked by and waved shyly to Irene before bowing to Seulgi.

Seulgi already got a lot of attention from boys and girls and would undoubtedly. Boys could stop seeing her as competition, and girls could start writing love confessions with the hope in their hearts a little more full than before.

Seulgi was used to the attention. She'd been at the school for a couple years already, anyway. 

Irene absentmindedly rubbed Seulgi's bicep, feeling the strong muscle resist the squeeze of her fingers.

"You're so strong!" Irene's jaw dropped, amazed. When had her cute bear gotten so jacked?

"Ah, Hyun," said an embarrassed Seulgi. She snatched her arm back from Irene's grasp. "No, I'm not."

"Um, yes, you are." Irene tried to grab at Seulgi again. She just wanted to touch Seulgi one more time.

"You're being like my fangirls," chuckled Seulgi, fending off Irene's invasive hand.

"What?" Irene's hand froze mid-air before dropping in defeat.

"My fangirls," repeated Seulgi. "They always try things like that."

Irene didn't like how that sounded.

"They shouldn't do things like that to you, Seul. Not if you don't like it."

Seulgi smiled and shrugged before answering cheekily, "Who said I didn't like it?"

"Ah..." Irene pursed her lips. "Nothing less for popular Kang!" She nudged Seulgi with a fist to the shoulder.

"I'm not that popular," Seulgi said.

"You're so humble."

"I try to be."

"Wow, how can someone like you exist?" Irene mused. "The perfect package."

"I know you're just dying to find someone like me, Hyun," Seulgi teased.

"You wish I was," retorted Irene.

"You two done over there?" Wendy raised an eyebrow and looked at Irene, who pretended not to notice.

"Done doing what?" Seulgi asked.

"...Whatever that was."

"I don't know, Wendy." Seulgi pretended to think. "Am I done?"

"Oh, go to hell, Seulgi."

"I'll meet you there."

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Lunch is almost over."

Wendy, Yeri, and Joy left Seulgi and Irene.

"So you're sure that you're okay with me being... me?" Seulgi asked seriously.

"Yes, of course!" Irene wasn't sure why Seulgi kept asking. It almost annoyed her. "Do you think I can't stand people like you or something?"

"People like me?" Seulgi knitted her brows.

"That's not what I mean. You know that."

"...You're really okay with me?"

"I am, Seul. I promise. Pinky promise. Okay?" Irene hooked her pinky around Seulgi's and shook it. "Pinky promise."

Seulgi gave in. "Okay."

 

That night, Irene lay in bed staring at her ceiling. She'd just finished calling her boyfriend, Park Bo Gum. He was the sweetest guy, and Irene loved him a lot. He normally was able to calm Irene's mind and put her at ease, but not today. After hanging up, she was still rattled, her heart thumping in her chest. Seulgi was gay? Irene didn't know what to make of it. She wasn't homophobic or anything. Was she? It was just that... Seulgi? Seulgi Kang? Irene never would have guessed.

Irene resolved to do some research and figure out how to treat her gay friend. Did you need to treat them any differently? Seulgi was still Seulgi, right? Irene decided she was overthinking. After looking through two articles -- one was titled "Is your friend gay?" and the other "Gays: Still People" -- she gave up.

Irene felt honored that Seulgi decided to come out to her and their friends. That meant Seulgi trusted her. Trust felt good.

That was the last thing to cross Irene's mind before she gave in to the sweet beckoning call of sleep.

Homework was overrated, anyway.


	2. It's a Process

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi and Irene are feeling a little strange around each other after Seulgi's coming out. Irene doesn't know what to do, and Seulgi is very worried.

There's a certain electrifying feeling that comes with baring your soul for the world to see. The feeling surges through the tips of your fingers and sets your hair on end. You lay yourself out, and your hopes and dreams are there for the world to crush between unrelenting fingers and sprinkle on that day's broken society salad. When you let yourself be so vulnerable, you hold a certain power. It's ironic, really. You're supposed to be at the mercy of those around you when at the same time, they're at  _your_ mercy. Why? Well, what do you have to lose? Everything, in a sense, but you're the one coming clean. You're the one in control. You put the information out there because  _you_  wanted to, so they can't hold that against you. Anything they do to take you down is guaranteed to fail because you have nothing else left to lose. All you are is all they know. There's nothing left to find.

Seulgi Kang had gone into this whole thing with a similar mindset. However, reality was far from the book-worthy story she crafted in her mind, a description of emotion empowering her to just come out and say it.

"I'm gay."

The second the words left her mouth, she knew the ball was in their court. Her friends, her best friends... How would they react?

Seulgi wasn't insecure, exactly, about being gay, but isn't everyone a little scared of what people will say? The rumors? The whispers? Seulgi knew that there were girls with crushes, and boys, too. She knew that her sexuality didn't define her. She wouldn't let it define her. But in a way, didn't it define her? Kang Seulgi, a lesbian. Seulgi didn't like that.

When her friends didn't speak, Seulgi felt her hands grow clammy. This was it. This was the moment where Seulgi's life would fall apart.

Luckily, Seulgi didn't need to worry. Her friends were fine with it. All of them except for Irene, anyway.

Irene.

Seulgi couldn't tell what was on Irene's mind. What was the raven-haired girl keeping from her? 

Irene had seemed so... hesitant. When Seulgi came out, Irene didn't really react. Seulgi thought she would feel worse if her friends reacted badly, but the lack of reaction felt just as bad. It was just so uncertain. Seulgi couldn't tell whether everything was okay. She wanted it to all be okay. She didn't want to lose Irene.

 

Irene awoke to her alarm roaring in her ears. She yawned and stretched her arms up above her head, reaching for the stars that she thought impossible to reach. Dreamers were a kind she could never understand. She needed _some_ stability in her life. The unknown was just too... unknown. She stuffed a bun in her mouth, yelling goodbye to her mom as she darted out the door towards the bus. While sitting in her seat, headphones securely tucked into her ears, she chewed her lip.

Seulgi was gay.

Gay.

Irene could not stop thinking about it. She wasn't sure why. It was just so weird. Seulgi was gay. A lesbian! Who would have thought?

The bus arrived at the school's front, and Irene made her way through the countless number of kids gradually entering the school premises. She found her locker and turned the dial slowly.

Seulgi was gay.

"Seulgi-ssi!" Irene took a step back in surprise and dropped her textbook. "...Hi?"

Clearly, those articles she'd read last night had not helped.

"Hey," Seulgi said, looking amused. "You good?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Irene shoved some papers deep into the dark crevices of her backpack.

"Anyway," said Seulgi, picking up the previously dropped textbook that Irene had neglected to pick up, "did you finish that paper for Kim? Mine took forever."

"Paper?" Shit. Irene had totally forgotten about that paper. Instead of writing, she'd been reading articles. Gay articles.

"Don't tell me you forgot? Oh, my god, you totally forgot." Seulgi watched Irene's face contort into a state of panic. "Hey, don't freak, okay? You'll be fine."

"Who are you kidding, Seul? Because it's not me. Teacher Kim is going to flay my ass on her desk for the whole class to see."

"Does that mean I get front row seats?"

"Yah!"

"I kid, I kid." A shrill ring echoed through the halls. Seulgi glanced up at the clock on the wall. "We better head to class."

Irene groaned. "Head to my death, more like it."

"Oh, cheer up," Seulgi said, patting Irene on the back. "You don't know that Kim will be mad."

 

Boy, was Teacher Kim mad. She was definitely having an off day. Irene swore she saw steam shoot out from either side of Kim Taeyeon's head. 

"What do you mean, you don't have your paper?" Taeyeon loomed ominously above Irene, who felt incredibly short, probably also due to that fact that she was seated while Taeyeon stood terrifying next to Irene's desk. 

"I forgot to do it," answered Irene, She crossed her fingers under the desk for luck.  _Please, please,_ please _do not kill me_.

"Ah, so you 'forgot to do it,'" Taeyeon mocked. "Well, Miss Bae, that will be ten points deducted from your score automatically. You're lucky I don't take off more."

As Taeyeon walked away, Seulgi leaned over to whisper, "Lucky ducky."

"Shut up."

 

"Hey, baby," heard Irene as arms wrapped around her waist.

"Hey back," Irene said, turning around to hug her boyfriend. "What are you doing here? I thought you were sitting with your friends."

"Can't a guy come and see his beautiful girlfriend?" Bo Gum pecked Irene's cheek.

"I guess," laughed Irene through continuous tickles. Bo Gum's hands attacked her sides from all angles. Seulgi just wrinkled her nose. Too much PDA.

"How come we aren't like that?" Joy asked Yeri.

"Because we aren't dating, stupid," Yeri pushed Joy away.

"Wow, you two are bickering," commented Wendy, who took a big bite out of her sandwich. "How coupley."

"Don't encourage her!" 

A napkin hit Wendy in the face. "Yah! You don't have to throw things at me!"

"You three are too much," Seulgi said, sipping from her thermos. She'd packed some nice hot chocolate in the morning, and it was still warm. She sprinkled in some mini marshmallows before taking another sip.

"I'll leave you to your friends, Irene." Bo Gum kissed her cheek once more before crossing the cafeteria to a table full of rowdy boys.

"So what's it like dating a popular boy, Irene?" Yeri propped her chin up on her palms, fingers framing the rest of her face.

"We've only been dating a few months, Yeri."

"That's a long time, unnie," Joy chimed in.

"Very long." Seulgi nodded her approval.

"So, so lo-"

"I get it," interrupted Irene. "It's long."

"So everybody gets a say but me? Rude." Wendy crossed her arms across her chest with a huff.

"Fine. Finish."

"You really think I want to now? Hmph. So, so long."

"Good job," Seulgi said, nodding exaggeratedly at Wendy.

"Unnie," urged Yeri. "How is it?"

"Nice, I guess," shrugged Irene. "He's really nice. I like him a lot."

"You're blushing!" Joy crowed, pinching Irene's cheek.

"Aw, unnie!" Yeri clapped.

"I think you like him a little more than you let on." Seulgi gave Irene an easy smile.

"Okay, okay, Would you all stop pestering me?" Irene swatted Wendy's hand from her arm. "He's so sweet. Every time I see him, my stomach fills with butterflies, and my breath catches in my throat. I love him."

"Unnie," Yeri said seriously. "That's sickeningly adorable."

"Yah! You asked!"

"Kidding, unnie!" Yeri ducked Irene's flying hand. "Mom is so scary."

"Do you want to die?"

"Settle down, mom," Seulgi said, hugging Irene. "You don't want to anger a bear, do you, bunny?"

Irene scoffed. "Like you could keep me from ripping that she-devil apart." Yeri just laughed.

"I can try," said Seulgi mischievously. The corner of her lip tugged up into a half-smile, and she rested her head on Irene's shoulder. "Calm?"

"As close as one can get with  _her_ ," said Irene, glaring at Yeri. "You too!" Irene pointed at the cackling Joy and then at Wendy, who threw her hands up in mock offense.

"Who, me?" Wendy batted her eyes.

"You are all insufferable."

"Go complain to your boyfriend, unnie!"

"Yeri, I swear-"

"Ah, unnie," Seulgi said, holding Irene tighter. "Don't be too mad."

"Seulgi, I'm going to rip their heads-"

"Jeez, Irene."

"Okay, maybe just slightly mutilate-"

"I think it's time to head to class." Seulgi tossed her trash and pulled Irene by the hand. "Let's go."

"Don't think any of you are off the hook yet." Irene gave her best menacing look. Wendy waggled her eyebrows back.

"I'm sure being in love makes it all better, hm, unnie?" Seulgi looped her arm through Irene's as they left the cafeteria.

"Sometimes," admitted Irene, oblivious to any implications. "Other times, I still want to rip their heads off."

"Bo Gum won't want to hear that his girlfriend is in jail."

"You only go to jail if you get caught."

"How devious, Irene," laughed Seulgi. "Did you do the math homework?"

"We had math homework?"

"Irene!"

 

To say the least, Irene did not have a fabulous day. When Irene got home, she buried her face in her pillow. Ugh. Why was life so hard? At least Seulgi was acting normal. Irene knew she was the one being weird the other day. Seulgi was nice like that. Irene didn't know what she'd do without Seulgi. At the same time, Irene didn't what to do  _with_  Seulgi. Seulgi was the same Seulgi, she knew, but for some reason, her brain just wouldn't, _couldn't,_ work. The poor pillow that slammed against the wall fell limply to the ground. It didn't look so fluffy anymore.

A few houses down, Seulgi flipped through her textbook, a pen cap in her mouth. 

"Damn," muttered Seulgi as she examined the chewed up plastic nub. 

Seulgi highlighted a few sentences before giving up. She couldn't concentrate. What was Irene thinking? Today, she had been totally fine. Irene had reacted okay to Seulgi's touch, and she hadn't shied away, but Seulgi still felt uneasy. There was a feeling in the pit of her stomach, and she so desperately wanted it to go away. Seulgi didn't know what happened to the coming out scenario she had pictured in her mind. The rest of her friends had been so fine, but Irene was just not. Seulgi couldn't put a finger on it, but she could tell something was up.

She texted Irene. 

**Seulgi: Hey irene**

**Seulgi: I can't help but feel like something is weird**

Immediately, Irene texted back.

**Unnie <3: What's weird?**

Seulgi feels herself pause, her fingers hovering over the keyboard.

**Seulgi: nothing much, I guess**

**Seulgi: but like... how do penguins sound like that when they fall? it's so funny**

**Unnie <3: Sound like what?**

**Seulgi: I'll send you the video**

**Unnie <3: Oh my god**

**Unnie <3: They do sound so weird!**

**Seulgi: lol that was it**

**Unnie <3: Really? lol okay**

**Unnie <3: Sleep well**

**Seulgi: you too, unnie**

When Seulgi locked her phone, she sighed and fell back into her pillows. Talking it out with Irene didn't feel right, but it seemed like the right thing to do. However, easier said than done. Waiting it out sounded very appealing, though, like a nice, crisp red apple. Seulgi decided to take a bite.

But little did Seulgi know, the apple was the kind that poisoned Snow White and threw Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden; innocent enough with seemingly good intentions, the insidious purpose dwelling in the shadows just beneath the surface. Waiting never did do anyone any good.


	3. Crafting an Antidote

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Irene and Seulgi's are going through a rough patch.

The poison seeped slowly but surely. Seulgi spent the rest of the week tiptoeing around Irene, her stomach in her throat every time Irene so much as looked at her. None of it felt right. Even so, Seulgi couldn't bring herself to talk to Irene. She didn't see a point. Irene seemed happy enough, so Seulgi didn't need to go pick her brain for her own sake. Irene was doing okay, and that was what mattered.

 

"Unnie," Yeri said one day, walking alongside Irene to class. "Why is Seulgi avoiding you?"

"What?" Irene was taken aback by the question. To be truthful, she noticed Seulgi's lack of presence, the excuses to leave, and the flitting eye contact. Every time Irene so much as looked her way, Seulgi's eyes would immediately focus on whatever was closest. Irene noticed, but she  _really_  noticed once Seulgi's eyes landed on that annoying YooA. Irene was sure Seulgi was not interested at all in YooA, so when Seulgi decided to stare at her, Irene knew something was up. She just didn't know what.

"She's avoiding you," repeated Yeri. "How come?"

"I... I don't know what you're talking about."

"Okay," Yeri said doubtfully. "If you say so."

"And I do say so." That was how Irene left it before disappearing into the classroom, leaving Yeri more suspicious than before.

It was time for some of Yeri's signature scheming, complete with a touch of Joy.

 

"Hey, babe?"

"Yeah?"

"You seem a little distracted," Bo Gum said worriedly. He felt Irene's forehead. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Sorry," said Irene, snuggling up against Bo Gum's chest.

The two lay together on Irene's bed watching an episode of Marvel's Runaways. It was a quiet Friday evening, and Bo Gum's soccer game had been canceled. After practice, Bo Gum had run home, showered, and shown up on Irene's front steps with a pizza and his laptop. 

"What do you think about the staff?" Bo Gum asked, rubbing Irene's back. "Doesn't it look cool?"

"Very," agreed Irene. She waited before saying, "I think Seulgi's mad at me."

Bo Gum paused the episode and sat up, taking Irene's hands into his. "Talk to me."

Irene didn't know where she'd ever managed to find such a guy. "Well, she keeps coming up with convenient excuses whenever I show up..."

"Are you sure she's not just busy?"

"She won't even look me in the eyes."

"That's strange." Bo Gum's brow furrowed. "Maybe you should just talk to her, Hyun."

Irene loved when Bo Gum called her by cute nicknames. It made her feel like they were really a couple.

"I know I should, but..." Irene trailed off. She wasn't sure what she meant to say.

"But what?" prompted Bo Gum.

"Bo Gum, I think I might be homophobic."

"What?"

"Homophobic. I think I might be homophobic."

"I heard you the first time, Hyun, but... Really?"

"I don't know." Irene's worried look made Bo Gum wrap his arms around her.

"It's okay. I'm sure that you're not homophobic. People are people, and friends are friends. Seulgi is your friend, right?"

"Yes, but ever since she came out, I just feel so distant from her. What if it's because I'm homophobic? I know she's still a person, but what kind of friend am I? I can't even bring myself to ask what's wrong. I don't know what's wrong with us." A tear threatened to spill out of Irene's eye.

"You're just worrying over nothing, Hyun. You're one of the kindest people I know, and I know you love Seulgi. You're a good friend to her and everyone else you know. Once they break through that ice queen shell, that is."

"Yah!"

"I'm kidding," Bo Gum said, hugging Irene closer. "But see? There's the smile I love so much." Bo Gum tapped Irene on the chin before pulling her into a kiss. "Never lose that smile."

"I won't," said Irene back, her heart feeling a little more hopeful. Maybe Bo Gum was right. Maybe she was just having an off week. She still liked Seulgi, and she was sure Seulgi still liked her. "How could I with you around?"

 

"Seulgi unnie!" 

Seulgi let out a hefty "oof" as something collided with her back.

"Yeri-ah?"

"How did you know?" Yeri pulled back and crossed her arms.

"How could I not?"

"Anyway, unnie," Yeri said, stepping closer, "we need to talk."

"What? Why?" Seulgi shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. What could they possibly have to talk about? Not-

"YooA-"

Whew. 

"-and Irene."

Fuck.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb, Seulgi. I know you've been avoiding her."

Seulgi tried again. "YooA?"

"No, stupid. YooA has been attached to your hip.  _Irene_ ," Yeri said impatiently, adamantly stressing Irene's name. She pronounced it as if teaching a small child.

Actually, Yeri didn't. She wasn't sure. All the evidence pointed towards Seulgi avoiding Irene. Yeri felt like she hadn't seen them together in a long time. Whenever one entered the room, the other found the exit. It was All she knew was that Seulgi and Irene were both being weird, and it needed to stop. Whether all those excuses and strange disappearances and...

Nope. Seulgi was definitely avoiding her. 

Or maybe Irene was avoiding Seulgi? Maybe they were both avoiding the other. There was no reason to, but Yeri guessed there had to be something. The unnies would never be unreasonable and stupid for no reason. Well, most of the time. Yeri was giving her seniors too much credit.

The two stood in silence. Yeri's arms remained crossed, and tight-lipped Seulgi refused to speak. Yeri was the first to break the silence.

"You can't tell me I'm wrong."

Seulgi's mouth twitched, and she let the words flow free. "Fine! You're right," Seulgi exasperatedly admitted. "You're absolutely right."

"Ha!" Yeri said triumphantly. She reveled in her success before suddenly stopping to ask, "But why?"

Seulgi shrugged and rubbed her arm. "I dunno."

"Well," Yeri said, losing steam. She hadn't actually anticipated what to do when Seulgi admitted she was being weird. All she and Joy had come up with was a plan to make the two talk. Right! Plan! Yeri  _had_  planned what to do. She was so smart. "Seulgi unnie, I need you to come with me."

"Yeri, what are you do-" Seulgi was cut off as her body jerked forward, yanked ahead by the tight grip of Yeri's hand on her wrist.

"No time to waste!"

In the room, Joy sat with Irene. What was taking Yeri so long? 

"Joy, why am I here? It's been like half an hour, and you just keep weirdly looking at me every thirty seconds."

Joy chewed her lip. She didn't really have anything to tell Irene, so when she'd executed her part of the plan and gotten Irene into the room, there wasn't much to actually _keep_ Irene in the room. Joy was surprised Irene had indulged her this long.

Irene moved to get up when Joy suddenly yelled, "No!"

"What?" Irene's head tilted to the side, her eyes searching Joy for a reason to stay. "Yeah, okay. I'm going to go now."

As Irene started pulling open the door, an incredible force knocked her back. "Wha-?"

"Oops, sorry, unnie!" Yeri half-yelled the apology and shoved Seulgi through the doorframe. "Joy! There you are. I've been looking everywhere for you! 

Irene saw the brief hesitation in Joy's response and, lightning fast, shot a hand out. "Hey!"

Joy wriggled out of Irene's grasp. "Sorry! My Yeri needs me!"

Yeri's sketchy smile set Seulgi on edge. "Yeri, what are you up to this time?"

"Oh, what's that?"

"What?" Seulgi instinctively followed the point of Yeri's finger before realizing it was all a ruse. "Yeri, I swear-"

"Yeri!" Irene yelled, slamming fists against the door. "Let us out!"

It was to no avail. Yeri stood outside the door and smiled the most suspicious smile Seulgi had ever seen cross her face. Joy shrugged apologetically, standing behind Yeri. Irene was seething, the fire in her eyes causing Joy to look away. Irene angrily stamped her foot into the carpeted ground. Of course, the room that they were locked in had to be one of the several soundproof practice rooms usually frequented by a swarm of zealous music students but today instead occupied by one furious bunny and a very confused bear.

**annoying daughter: you'll thank me later**

**Irene: if you're still alive then**

As soon as she sent the text with an angry smash on the send key, Irene threw her phone, nearly hitting Seulgi smack dab in the forehead. Seulgi's quick reflexes sent her sprawling on the ground, head looking in every direction to see what flew through the air. Irene sighed, sitting in the nearest chair. She resigned to resting her head on her open palm, elbow resting on her knee. Seulgi's butt still sat glued to the floor. She waited for Irene to make the first move, but all the older just closed her eyes as if she were resting. Seulgi raised an eyebrow and pushed herself off the ground, taking a few tentative steps. Her hand, outstretched, stopped a mere few centimeters in front of Irene's shoulder. 

Seulgi stood there, waiting. Irene didn't move. Seulgi dropped her hand.

"Afraid to touch me?"

Seulgi jumped back in shock. Irene's eyes, to her dismay, were apparently not actually closed. Yikes.

"Unnie, you know that's not true."

"Sure I do."

Seulgi didn't say anything for a moment before mustering all the courage in her. Irene was kind of scary. "What's with the attitude, unnie?"

The beast inside Irene awoken, multiplying Seulgi's immense desire to cower in the corner by a million. Irene was a scary unnie.

"Excuse me?" Irene rose from the chair slowly. "Attitude?"

Irene couldn't believe it.  _Seulgi_  was the one avoiding her, leaving the room, and  _making excuses_ just so she didn't have to see Irene, and _Irene_ was the one with an attitude? Nuh uh. No. Nopity nope nope.

"Uh... I didn't mean it like that..." Seulgi tried to save herself, but it was too late.

"Okay,  _Seul_ ," Irene said through gritted teeth. The pet name was definitely not being used affectionately, as far as Seulgi could tell. "Then what did you mean, exactly? Hmm?"

"I just meant that, well... uh...you're acting strange?" Seulgi braced herself.

" _I'm_  the one acting strange?" Irene was shorter than Seulgi but for some reason, her presence was that of the giant from "Jack and the Beanstalk." Seulgi looked down and stared directly into the black hole eyes of the demon in front of her. Seulgi had made a mistake. "You, Seulgi, are the one who can't even look me in the eye. You make some lame ass excuse every time I so much as take one step into the same damn room you're standing in just so you don't have to see me! Why is that, Seulgi, you have suddenly disappeared from the face of the Earth these past few days, hmm? Suddenly, the famous Kang Seulgi is Kang Seul-gone!"

Irene couldn't help herself. The pun had just slipped out. Seulgi stifled a laugh, but Irene noticed.

Saving her dignity, Irene continued, "I tell you what's on my mind, and you really are going to laugh at me? You really are something."

"Yah, Irene," Seulgi began to reply. "You think I avoid you? You think I look away because I can't bear to look into your eyes?"

"Yeah, Se-"

"Well, _Joohyun_ , unnie," said Seulgi, ready to cut that beanstalk down. Was Irene trying to pin this all on  _her_? No way. "I noticed all of it. I noticed how you couldn't even say  _one thing_  to me w-when I came out." Her voice shook as she remembered how it felt to come out. She remembered how her heart seized in her chest, how she reached inside and presented it to her friends. And Irene was the only one who didn't take it. "Do you know how long I've been wanting to t-tell you guys? Do you know how much it's hurt to keep this i-inside? I'm n-not like you, Irene. I don't get some popular b-boyfriend. I don't have someone like that there for me to catch me when I f-fall. You say the famous Kang Seulgi? The popular Kang Seulgi? It's ch-changed, I-Irene. People... look at me differently. I s-see it when I walk down the hallway. I know it'll get better, but... n-not now." Seulgi's face fell and her lip trembled. Her wet cheeks glistened.

"Seulgi-"

"You know what? Forget it." Seulgi retreated to the corner of the room, crouching instead of cowering from Irene's anger. It didn't matter anymore.

"I..." 

Irene was at a loss for words. She remembered Bo Gum's reassurance that she wasn't homophobic. As she stood, staring at the crying girl before her, Irene realized she didn't feel afraid. Afraid. Was that what homophobia was? Irene didn't feel afraid. She didn't want to get away, and she didn't want to leave. She didn't want to let Seulgi go. But she wasn't putting in the effort to make her stay, either.

Irene crouched beside Seulgi and gave her a hug. She had never seen Seulgi like this. _Ever._  Seulgi's sniffles echoed in Irene's ears. The ragged breaths that came with each heavy sob sent Seulgi's body quaking. Irene tightened her hold in the hopes that Seulgi would do something, say something. Maybe even push her away. Seulgi did nothing.

"I'll catch you," finally whispered Irene, a tear dripping down her own face. "I'll always catch you."

But Seulgi didn't hear her over the sobs that shook her whole body. She didn't hear Irene over the static that filled her mind as her brain struggled to tune into the right channel. She felt all out of sync.

Irene didn't say it again.

 

"Yeri-ah," Wendy said cautiously. The young evil genius was manically cackling at something on her laptop screen. "Don't you think they've been taking a long time?"

"We have all the time in the world," Yeri said dismissively. She waved a hand as if to send Wendy away. "They're fine."

"Listen to her." Joy nodded. "She knows what she's doing."

"You're under some spell," said Wendy, wagging a finger. "You really think we shouldn't check on them?"

"Check, shmeck. You go do it if you want." Yeri turned her attention back to her laptop.

Wendy rolled her eyes and shot Joy a look before stepping into the hallway. She briskly walked towards the practice room. Seulgi and Irene had been in there for a really long time. When she reached the right practice room (two wrong practice rooms later), she peeked through the window. Seulgi and Irene both sat on the ground, Irene's arms wrapped around Seulgi. 

 _Oh,_  Wendy thought to herself. _I guess they've worked it out_. 

They looked like they were having a moment, so Wendy quietly unlocked the door and left. Too bad she didn't know the truth. They were far from okay.


	4. Head Spinning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe Seulgi and Irene never actually understood each other as well as they though they did.

Seulgi opened her locker with a depressed clang. The faded blue paint scraped lightly against the row of lockers that, stacked neatly against the wall, looked too perfect to exist. It was infuriating. The lockers measured carefully, stacked carefully, and carefully placed.

Carefully. With care.

Seulgi didn't care. She exhaled hard, shaking her head and taking a deep breath.  _Chill out._ Seulgi rummaged for her Art History textbook. She was so forward looking to sitting in a lecture, words slower than a turtle racing a hare. So slow. Almost too slow. Just right.

A piece of notebook paper had floated to the ground. It crumpled beneath Seulgi's foot, the crinkle music to her ears.

Finally. Not perfect.  

Seulgi held the paper between two hands. She smoothened some of the wrinkles with her thumb. Oh, well. It'd have to do. To hell with perfection.

"Seulgi-ah," she read out loud. She stopped and skimmed the rest of the paper with one brow raised. No. it couldn't be. It couldn't, and it wouldn't be.

_Seulgi-ah~_

_Is there a lot on your mind? You look so busy lately._  
Don't work too hard! Take some rest. I know you've earned it.  
I want to see you smile again.

Seulgi stopped skimming and crushed the paper within her bag, not even bothering to slam her locker shut. 

"Bae Joohyun!" Seulgi yelled, startling the girl.

Irene whipped around, bookbag nearly swinging off her shoulder with the force of a track and field hammer throw. She didn't register much besides her name and looked confused at the person stomping towards her. The person's mouth was opening and closing and Irene could see the anguish in her eyes.

"-Are you even listening to me?" Seulgi was almost screaming now. "Are you?"

"Uh..." Irene blinked, brought back to reality by Seulgi's hands shaking her shoulders.

"You can't even listen to me now? Even now, Irene?" Seulgi's head drooped and she stopped moving, her hands still gripping Irene. "You're so cruel."

"Seulgi," began Irene. She hesitated at the bewildered look in Seulgi's eyes, the look of a wild animal trapped in a cage with no escape, destined for a life freedom-free. "I... What are you talking about?"

Seulgi breathed hard. Irene saw her chest heave with a sharp inhale. "Are you kidding?" Seulgi pulled the notebook paper from her backpack and shoved it into Irene's face. "This! This is what I'm talking about!"

Irene glanced up and down the mysterious sheet. "Should I know anything?"

Seulgi scoffed in disbelief. "Don't play dumb, Joohyun. I know you wrote this as some sick joke. Who else would write me something like this? Who else  _ever_  wrote me something like this? You can't just tell me to smile again, not when you're the one who has taken it away." She sniffled and a crack formed in Irene's perfect facade. "Why can't we just be okay? But I guess those days are over. Don't forget that. You can't just walk all over me and expect things to be okay. You can't just pretend nothing happened and that I'll come back to you just like _that_." Seulgi snapped her fingers as she said the last word, spun on her heels and left Irene with a dumbfounded look on her face, paralyzed.

A wrinkled paper ball lay at Irene's feet. She bent down to pick it up and gingerly unfolded the note.

_Seulgi-ah~_

_Is there a lot on your mind? You look so busy lately._  
Don't work too hard! Take some rest. I know you've earned it.  
I want to see you smile again. Your smile is so pretty~

_I know we don't talk much, but please know I look out for you, unnie.  
Maybe one day we can meet. Take care~_

_Love,  
Your secret admirer_

Irene's cheeks flushed pink. Seulgi thought she wrote that? No way. No damn way. Irene folded the sheet and slid it into a folder. She had a boyfriend, for fuck's sake. She wouldn't do that to Bo Gum. She loved Bo Gum. But... what did this mean? What was on Seulgi's mind? Irene felt her stomach fold inward as if trying to expel itself from her body. Did Seulgi think she had a crush on her or something? Seulgi thought Irene was her secret admirer?

In the bathroom, Irene's head hung dangerously close to the seat. Her hair brushed against the stall wall as her head dipped to the side. She was just so tired. She was tired of whatever this was. She and Seulgi weren't fighting, but they also weren't talking, to the dismay of Yeri and Joy. Wendy was just mad at Yeri and Joy. Whenever Irene saw Seulgi, it was just as if they didn't know each other. They knew names, and that's all they stuck to. It was as if after that incident in the practice room, Irene and Seulgi had forgotten how to be friends. What it meant to be friends. And that they missed being... friends.

Irene sighed and blinked slowly. A high-pitched frequency rang in her ears. She closed her eyes shut and blinked some more. There were so many spots. Spots, spots, spots. Dogs had spots. Dalmatians.

Black. Spots.

When Seulgi threw open the bathroom door, she had not expected to hear another loud noise resonate from the opposite end of the room. She knelt down, scanning the bathroom for signs of life, and found the bare minimum.

When Seulgi crawled into the stall, she had not expected to see Bae Irene slumped over a toilet seat. She unlocked the door from the inside and pulled Irene into her arms without a second thought.

When Seulgi carried the girl's body out of the restroom, she had not expected to have done so. She berated herself, cursing her weak will, and cursing the fact that she had not hesitated to hold the girl who had caused her so much pain.

So. Much. Pain.

Everything was pain.

That was the first thing Irene thought when she woke up: everything was pain. She, Irene, was synonymous with pain.

The literal embodiment of pain. Irene.

She groaned on the bed and let her eyes open slightly. Light blinded her, and she recoiled into the mattress. When her eyes had finally adjusted, she saw a chair, but there was something unusual about the chair. There was a person in it. That person was Kang Seulgi.

"You drool," said Seulgi flatly. Her words fell short of humor, but Irene could tell that wasn't where Seulgi had been aiming. Before Irene could reply, Seulgi looked away and stood up. She pulled once at her collar before bowing. "I'm sorry to disturb you, sunbae. Please rest well."

There was no emotion behind her words. Seulgi had tied her feelings to a brick of melancholy before launching it out of the window, never to be seen again. Supposedly. Seulgi's stony-faced expression made Irene's blood run cold.

Teddy bears were supposed to look cuddly. This bear did not.

Seulgi bowed once more before leaving without a second glance. Seulgi and Irene were just Seulgi and Irene. Nothing more, nothing less.

For now, that was all Irene could ask for. No school sweetheart is greedy. It doesn't pay well.

 

"You took her?" Wendy frowned. It didn't make any sense. "Why?"

"She was so helpless-looking," Seulgi said, a spoonful of rice shoved into her mouth. Her expression betrayed no inner thoughts. "I just did what was right."

"But, Seulgi, I thought-?"

"Thought what?"

Wendy shifted her position. She waited to speak again. "I don't know, Seul. You two are in a weird spot. Why didn't you leave her?"

"I couldn't just leave an unconscious person in the bathroom-"

"No, Seul. You know what I mean." Wendy's tone punctured straight through flesh, aiming for the heart, but you can't aim for what's not there. "You were there when she woke up."

"What of it?" Seulgi didn't bother looking up as she stabbed some lettuce with a fork. "Doesn't mean anything."

"Doesn't mean anything?" Wendy couldn't believe her ears. Seulgi really was going to stay with Bae Irene for four hours for nothing? Wendy didn't think so. "Four hours, Seul.  _Four hours_."

"Yeah, so? I'm a decent person."

"A decent person would've just left her there and gone."

"I'm not just any decent person."

"Then stop telling me it doesn't mean anything that you, Kang Seulgi, stayed with an unconscious Bae Irene for four hours!" Wendy's hand curled into a fist.

"I just did what any friend would have done," said Seulgi, standing up from the table. "I'm a good friend."

 _Too good_ , thought Wendy as she watched Seulgi leave.  _Too good_.

Seulgi dumped the extra contents of her lunch in the compost and trash bins before taking long strides out of the cafeteria. Once she was out of view, she pressed herself up against the nearest wall, her heart beating in her rib cage. Blood rushed in her ears. Her mind felt foggy, and her legs felt tense. Time slowed, and Seulgi's mind suddenly was so clear, yet jumbled. She couldn't think, yet she could process everything around her. She slid down the wall and pulled her knees to her chest. She bent her head forward to rest in between her knees.

Irene Bae.

Irene Bae.

Irene Bae.

Joohyun.

Unnie.

Seulgi flinched. Her so-called "unnie" was, at the moment, her biggest issue. Irene was making her stress. Irene was making lose her mind and lose her shit. Irene was making her get distracted, and Irene was making her friend group split.

But Irene didn't make her go to the infirmary. Irene didn't make her do anything then. 

It was all Seulgi.

 _Joohyun-ah,_ thought Seulgi as she pressed her face into her palms.  _Where did I go wrong?_

 

Irene didn't know. Irene didn't know why Seulgi had bothered to stay and honestly, she didn't know why Seulgi had bothered to scoop her barely breathing body up from the cold tile floor, bringing her from the restroom to the infirmary. Irene didn't get it. They weren't on the best of terms. Irene's fault, probably, Definitely, Irene didn't know. But she did know. Her fault, her fault. A precious bear could not fault. A teddy bear just loved and loved. Except, now there was no love. Well, it just didn't come to Irene. She missed its warm embrace. She missed it.

She ended up on the front steps.

"Irene?"

"Let me in."

"...Okay."

Irene crossed the threshold, making sure to take her shoes off and exchange them for slippers, before sinking into the cushioned couch.

"Hold me," Irene commanded. Arms obeyed, nice and warm. But teddy bear warm was a different kind of warm. She liked this kind, but she wanted _that_ kind.

She  _needed_  that kind.

She was starved and ravenous and on the prowl. She was a predator who couldn't find her prey. A deep hunger stirred and sat unsatisfied, crying out for what it couldn't have. Not yet. It would have to wait.

Her boyfriend still felt nice. Not _that_  kind of warm, but this kind of warm. It would have to do.

 

"H-hi," YooA said, presenting Seulgi with a lunchbox. "I made it for you."

"YooA, wow!" Seulgi's eyes lit up as she examined the inside. "This looks amazing!"

"Do you like it?"

"I love it."

Irene wanted to puke in her mouth, YooA was so damn obvious, drooling over Seulgi and following her around like an obedient puppy, Irene wasn't sure when it started, but sure enough, YooA was now a constant presence in Seulgi's life.

"Unnie?"

"Ah, Yeri," Irene said automatically. "Sorry."

"I'm worried about you."

"I'm not the one you should be worried about."

"YooA is fine."

"How did you know I meant YooA?" Irene asked, staring hard.

"You're practically burning holes into the back of her head," snorted Yeri. "Anyone can tell you don't like her."

"It's just strange," said Irene. "She came up out of nowhere."

"Seulgi's had classes with her before, and she has one or two with YooA now. Just because you didn't notice YooA doesn't mean she hasn't been here. Your observation skills aren't too sharp now, hmm, unnie?"

"Don't get smart with me," Irene snapped.

"Okay, mother."

"Yah! YooA just gives me strange vibes. That's all."

"Well, YooA and Seulgi have been friends for a while. That's all." Yeri patted Irene's back. "She's no one to worry about."

"Okay," Irene said reluctantly. "Okay."

YooA was just a bit suspicious. Just a bit.

That was all.


	5. Disconnect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe things will actually be okay.

"Hyun-ah."

"Huh?" Irene dropped the pencil she was absentmindedly rolling between her fingers. She looked at her boyfriend's concerned face, the worry lining his sharp features and handsome face. So handsome.

"Are you okay?" His one arm, slung around her shoulders, moved from its place and settled beside its owner. He shifted his body to face Irene and propped his chin upon his fist, his elbow resting on the back of the couch. He leaned into the couch and waited patiently for a response.

Irene's eyes flicked to the ground. Was it Seulgi who gave her that pencil? "You're staring at me so intensely, Bo Gum." 

"I'm only worried about you."

Fingers wrapped around Irene's own, giving them a comforting squeeze. There was so much Irene wanted to say, to spill. She couldn't bring herself to. She'd cut Seulgi deep for no reason. She'd pushed Seulgi away and sent her into the arms of that damn YooA who waited to snatch Seulgi up. Irene hated how YooA looked at Seulgi. She hated how Seulgi looked back, a wide smile full of teeth shining at the younger girl. YooA always laughed, Seulgi laughing too, and Irene always left as soon as possible. There was no use in making herself hurt more than she already did. Her heart beat faster as she thought about the bear's smile. Irene missed being able to make Seulgi smile like that, with _real_ happiness. Real hope.

Love.

It seemed that now, all she made Seulgi do was smile sadly. A small smile, not even half the size of those gifted to YooA. 

Irene managed to look her boyfriend in the eyes. She wanted to tell him everything. She wanted to spill all that plagued her mind in the hopes that he'd save her from herself and hold her close, whispering sweet nothings in her ear while stroking her hair. His touch was so calming.

However, Irene couldn't bring herself to say anything. Her boyfriend, no matter how amazing, couldn't help her now. She didn't want to burden him with a problem he couldn't solve. She didn't want him to become just as broken, tearing himself up inside as he knowingly watched Irene and Seulgi's friendship fall before his feet in tatters that only Irene, not him, could piece back together. 

"Don't worry," Irene finally said, pressing her forehead against Bo Gum's. She ran a hand through his hair. "There's just a lot on my mind with school."

Bo Gum's lip quirked up at one corner. "Class President, Bae Irene, you work yourself too hard." 

"You're the one leading the team to victory time after time," Irene answered back with a smile of her own, snuggling into the crook of his neck and pressing a hand to his chest. His heart beat so strongly against her touch. It felt so real. Too real.

This was reality, and she wished it was a nightmare. That way, she could wake up. 

_Seulgi-ah... Do you miss me too?_

 

"She doesn't hate you, you know," Yeri said. She stretched her body across the bed and yawned. "This bed is soft. I might just fall asleep."

_I wish I could fall asleep. That way, I could wake up. Wake up from this terrible dream. Is this what it has come down to? My life was so full, but now there's a hole just for you. I feel like an incomplete puzzle. I'm missing pieces. I miss you. Do you miss me too?_ _When we look at each other, I see the hurt in your eyes. Can't you see I'm hurting too? Words that should come so easily instead flow like tar, the slow glops landing at my feet when they are instead meant to land at yours. Our paths used to cross and intertwine like best friends' should. How come now it seems like I couldn't find you if I tried?_

"You zoned out again." Yeri flicked Seulgi's temple. "Knock, knock. Anyone in there?"

"Ouch, Yeri," Seulgi grumbles, flinching back. She was caught up in her dramatic thoughts again, recently plagued constantly by the older girl. It seemed that this way of thinking was the only way she could hope to sort out her feelings at all. Everything hurt.

"Yah! Pay attention, won't you? Yah, Kang Seulgi."

Nothing had really happened between Irene and Seulgi to make them like this. Seulgi had thought maybe Irene didn't accept her. Couldn't accept her. Except now, maybe Seulgi had been wrong all along. Maybe she'd cause this unsealable rift and driven away someone who'd given her the world. Irene was so caring and sweet. That's why everyone liked her. She was just so nice. Her smile lit up an entire room.

"Hey, look at me!"

Seulgi missed that smile.

She missed Irene's hugs, her incessant nagging, her love of fabric softener, and even her butt smacks.

Especially her butt smacks.

Those were reserved for an elite few, and Seulgi yearned to join them once again. She didn't really even know when she'd been thrown out in the first place.

But if you'd asked Irene, she wouldn't have known either. She didn't know whether Seulgi had ever been thrown out or whether now she was just a member in the shadows, waiting to make an appearance. Her best friend, Kang Seulgi, was still her best friend. She thought. It was Irene's own fault that Seulgi had resigned herself to thrive in the background. It was Irene who'd done this. If only she'd given Seulgi just one reassuring look, one reassuring pat. If only she'd let Seulgi know that everything was okay. Better than okay.

Because now they were certainly far from okay. That was a thought Irene couldn't get out of her head.

Far from okay.

Irene still wasn't even sure why she  _hadn't_  done any of those things or why she hadn't said something. She didn't know why in that moment all she could do and had done was be surprised and wear a mask on her face as her thoughts raced a mile a minute to think of what to do. She guessed her inner machinery had decided to break and overload, Seulgi's inputs expecting to return a response and instead getting silence.

Irene knew now how powerful silence was. Wasn't that why it hurt so much when it came to Seulgi? The bear was silent. She wouldn't say anything and when she did, a very rare hello, she disappeared before Irene could say something back. 

Powerful silence. Right.

She was being a hypocrite, Irene was. She was being silent too. She looked at Seulgi and hoped maybe one look would be all it took, but it wasn't. Eyes would meet and no words would follow. Footsteps would echo in the halls and ricochet off the walls, slamming back into Irene with the weight of the silence that had just moments before filled the space.

They were two people on opposite sides of a chasm with no way to cross. Except it seemed like neither really tried.

Irene, as she took a deep breath, tried to pay attention to the movie that Bo Gum was so deeply engrossed in. After being reassured by his girlfriend that she was okay, a nagging voice in the back of his head telling him no, Bo Gum hesitantly dropped the subject and watched the TV screen. She'd tell him when she wanted to, and if she wanted to. He loved Irene. He hoped she knew that.

She watched as the man was bitten. She watched as his small daughter screamed, held back by a crying woman who would never replace her mother.  _Train to Busan_ was a cruel film. It was filled with excruciatingly painful cliches that never failed to leave Irene wanting more. 

When the man flew off the side, a montage of thoughts flashing across the screen, something stirred inside Irene. Something about his loss, a loss she'd watched a million times, struck her strangely this time around. He'd waited until the end when all was lost to realize what he truly had. Irene couldn't afford to do that. 

She took the first step across the gaping pit, Seulgi's friendly form waving on the other side.

"Aish, you really are annoying," Yeri said after finally snapping Seulgi out of whatever trance she'd sucked herself into.

"Sorry," mumbled Seulgi. "What were you trying to tell me?"

"I was  _trying_  to tell you that she's not mad at you," pouted Yeri. " _Somebody_  wasn't paying attention."

"Sorry, sorry, sorry," apologized a sarcastic Seulgi with shoulders up in a shrug. She had skipped over the first part of what Yeri said. "Wait, what?"

"You're really trying to test me today, Kang Seulgi. I said, she's not mad at you. So could you please stop moping around and just talk to her?"

"Moping?" Seulgi crinkled her nose. Yeri didn't understand how she felt. Yeri couldn't understand how she felt. "My heart hurts just looking at her, Yeri."

"And it will keep hurting," replied Yeri, whose body rolled across the bed to land her head in Seulgi's lap. "I can't stand seeing my unnies sad." Seulgi gave her a signature sad smile, the smile that majority saw nowadays. "Won't you please talk to her?"

"Does she even want to talk to me?" Seulgi asked as she ran her fingers down the maknae's cheek. The youngest of the friend group, their broken friend group, looked up at Seulgi and studied her face.

"Of course she does, Seulgi."

"I don't believe you."

"She wants to talk to you."

"Then how come she hasn't?"

"How come  _you_  haven't?" Yeri shot back. She immediately saw the hurt flash across Seulgi's ashamed face from the accusatory tone.

"I just... I just can't." A tear slipped out of one eye.

"Hey, hey," Yeri said, reaching up to wipe Seulgi's face. "I'm sorry."

Seulgi exhaled hard. "No, I am. I caused all this." As she said the last word, she spread a hand, gesturing to all that's happened. Yeri could tell.

"No, you didn't. It's not your fault."

"But I'm partly to blame, aren't I? I came out and caused our friend group to be like this. Now you and Joy and Wendy all have to suffer."

"And Irene," Yeri added.

"Does she suffer too?" Seulgi's tone was almost wistful.

"...Yes."

"Is despicable of me for my heart to feel better after hearing your words?" Seulgi laughed bitterly. "It's like I want her to feel awful."

"You're not a bad person, Seul," Yeri said gently. A drop fell onto her face and her skin absorbed some of Seulgi's anguish. "You just want someone to understand."

"You... understand," mumbled Seulgi through heaving breaths. 

Yeri wished she could hold Seulgi's heart in her hands and put it back together herself, but she knew that power didn't lie with her. "Not enough."

Seulgi's phone pinged with a sad sense of nostalgia. She recognized that tone.

**Unnie <3: Seulgi**

**Unnie <3: We need to talk**

Yeri caressed trembling fingers and held them to her face. Seulgi couldn't stop shaking, even with the younger girl's touch sending warmth through her body, the message "it'll be okay" reverberating through her entire being.

_Yes, unnie. We do._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will start to mend from here for Seulrene friendship-wise, so keep rooting for them as they go through some more angst. Thank you for all your comments and support. Please continue giving this fic lots of love!


	6. Over Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi and Irene meet to talk things over.

Taking a leap of faith, Irene had sent those texts. She waited patiently in the coffee shop, fingers wrapped tightly around the caramel latte she ordered fifteen minutes ago. She had arrived early, hoping to calm her nerves before her friend walked through the door with a telltale _ring!_ from the bell above.

She didn't want to talk to Seulgi. She really didn't. She didn't know why. Her best friend was now the one person she could barely look at. Her body reacted too strongly from the simplest interaction, sending her heart into overdrive and making her chest seize, her lungs drowning despite being in a sea of air. Looking at Seulgi just reminded her of how she'd looked at Seulgi that day, emotionless. Exactly what Seulgi hadn't needed. She couldn't explain why she had reacted that way, which was, well, not really reacting. 

A thousand thoughts swirled in her mind. It was too much. Maybe she really was homophobic, and that thought twisted her up inside more than anything.

As fate would have it, just as Irene's chair scraped against the floor, Seulgi's slim figure walked through the door. Irene couldn't do anything except sit back down. She'd done this to herself. It was time to face it.

"Hi," said Irene in a small voice. She forced herself to meet Seulgi's eyes. Those warm, warm eyes. They were hesitant and unsure.

"Hey."

There was an awkward pause as either grappled for something to say, searching their minds for some coherent response to pop the silent bubble that encapsulated them separately from the rest of the coffee shop. They were in a different world, feeling different things than everyone else with their smiles and laughs also adding to the bustling milieu. Irene and Seulgi were just there to be there, to be awkward, and to begin repairing the irreparable: a break in trust, and a crack in impression. 

In what was an immensely emotional event, the weight of which Irene would never know (so she thought), Irene had not been the support she was supposed to be. She'd always been there for Seulgi, picking her up from the ground. Irene was there when Seulgi needed her. Always. Except for the one. The big leagues. Instead of taking their friendship up a step, Seulgi had stood up on that step and looked down at her before Irene let her fall down, tumbling to the bottom, where Irene rushed too late to help her, leaving them both at square one.

"I'm sorry."

It was Irene could say. The atmosphere was suffocating, the sense of Seulgi's suffering and reluctance choking Irene more than her own guilt.

"Okay."

"Seriously."

"I said, okay."

Irene desperately clawed at the wall in between them. "I'm sorry, Seul. I'm sorry-"

"Why'd you do it?"

"What?" Irene was taken aback by the question. Catlike eyes looked back at her, doubtful and unbelieving.

And so tired. Just so, so tired.

"I just want to know why you did it." Seulgi played with her hair, fingering split ends.

Irene felt almost ashamed to ask, "Did what?"

"Why did you push me away?" Seulgi's tone was flat. She expected an answer.

“I... didn't."

"Then what do _you_ call this?" Seulgi jabbed wildly at the space in between them. Her sudden flare of anger scared Irene, whose shoulders hunched forward, tense, while the rest of her body jerked back. "Look at us! We can't even talk normally. This is what we have been reduced to, and if you, Irene," a finger pointed towards the subject of her sentence, "didn't cause this, then I did, and I know damn well I didn't.  _You're_ the one who didn't reply to any of my calls or any of my texts." Seulgi slumped back in her seat, the energy she had all spent on a short outburst that didn't get across half the message that lay locked away in her heart. She didn't want to cause unnecessary drama with what felt like unnecessary words. That was for a later time. She already felt like she was saying too much.

"I don't know." Irene's few word answers were infuriating.

"Great, Irene!" Seulgi threw her hands up in frustration. "You. Don't. _Know_." Irene didn't respond quick enough, so Seulgi sighed and scooted her chair. "I'm going to get a drink. You mull that over and when I come back, you better have an answer."

Despite her pointed words, Seulgi's voice sounded exhausted, like she had given up. Just the thought of fighting another day with Irene in a fight of silence and disregard, of averted eyes and hallway detours, made Seulgi feel like her brain needed a hundred years' worth of sleep to feel revitalized again. All this uncertainty pulled her this way and that when really, the direction she needed to go in was towards homework and studying. Really, just school in general. She spent too much time thinking about Irene and not enough time on biology. Stupid biology.

Everyone else in the school was pretty okay about it. The whole "gay" thing. For the most part. Seulgi noticed some weird gazes and hallway whispers but didn't pay too much attention. She had Irene to worry about, after all. She had to figure that out first.

"Can I have a-"

"Seul?" YooA was practically about to jump over the counter with how excited she looked. 

"YooA!" Seulgi had not expected to see YooA in the coffee shop. Since when did YooA work there? Despite her confusion, Seulgi felt happy to see a friendly face. And a smile. Just for her. It made Seulgi feel all warm and fuzzy inside, the way you feel after hugging puppies. That is if you like puppies. "What are you doing here?"

"I work here, silly."

"Have you always worked here?"

YooA shrugged and smiled some more. "New job. Anyway, what would you like?"

"Caramel latte." Seulgi needed a bit of a wakeup call. "Actually, make that a cappuccino." She needed a _strong_ wakeup call.

"No, no," YooA said, pushing Seulgi's hand away. "On me."

"I really couldn't-"

"I mean it." YooA punched in a few things on the cash register before a  _ding!_  went off, signaling the end of the transaction. "Done."

"Thanks, YooA. I really appreciate it." Seulgi really did.

"No problem, Seul." YooA moved away to begin crafting Seulgi's drink. Seulgi followed her down the bar on the customers' side and took a seat. She watched as YooA began to mix espresso with milk. "So what are you here for? To see me?"

Seulgi snorted. "I didn't even know you worked here."

"True." YooA poured a design in the shape of a heart in Seulgi's cappuccino and handed it to Seulgi. "Here you go, Seulgi. One caramel cappuccino."

Seulgi raised up the cappuccino in acknowledgment, thanking YooA with a lofty smile.."I just came by to meet... a friend."

"Oh?" YooA paused and leaned towards Seulgi with an eyebrow raised. "Why do you say 'friend' in that tone?"

"What tone?" 

"You know what tone. Are you more than friends?"

Seulgi nearly choked on the coffee that managed to slide down her throat. "Excuse me?"

"More than friends," repeated YooA. She didn't understand why Seulgi didn't understand. It was a simple question, and she wanted an answer. "Are you more than friends?"

"No," Seulgi said, avoiding YooA's very intense gaze. "We aren't."

YooA slid her upper body back onto her side of the counter. She'd been leaning so precariously that Seulgi was afraid she'd tumble down onto the customer side of the bar.  "Good. I mean, cool."

"Uh huh." Seulgi tapped the side of her coffee and said, "I got to go back. Thanks again for the drink."

"Anything for my Seul." YooA turned with a whip of her hair and began greeting the next customer.

Irene noticed the exchange and watched the YooA she had been seeing too much of lately. She noticed YooA wave off Seulgi's attempt at payment and instead, make Seulgi a very strong coffee. Irene had frowned, wondering why Seulgi was ordering such a strong coffee as opposed to a latte. Seulgi had taken a very long time, in Irene's opinion, to get the coffee, but YooA was taking her damn time too. Irene didn't like it. She watched YooA glance in her direction, say something to Seulgi (who also glanced over), and then smile once Seulgi replied with what Irene hoped was not too terrible of a remark. Although Irene hadn't heard much of the conversation, or anything at all really -- damn coffee shops always being so loud --she had heard YooA call after Seulgi saying "my Seul."

Irene wrinkled her nose at the thought.

"Did you think of an answer?" Seulgi's coffee hit the table with an audible thud. The smile had been only for YooA.

"I can't give you an answer, because-"

"This was stupid," laughed Seulgi darkly. "I'm stupid." She moved to get up but Irene's hand shot out, having a mind of its own, to grasp Seulgi wrist. 

"Uh." Irene's brain finally caught up to her hand, and her eyes went from Seulgi to the hand and then back. She took a deep breath and said, "No, you're not. Stay."

"Give me a reason to," Seulgi challenged. Looking at Irene made her lungs compress, and she needed to get out.

"Is our friendship not reason enough?" Irene's eyes pleaded with Seulgi, tugging at heartstrings.

"I..." Seulgi pursed her lips and sat back down. "I'm sorry. You're right." She slowly sat back down and met Irene's eyes. "Where do we start?"

"From the beginning."


	7. Cuffing Season

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi's cuffed?

Whatever Irene and Seulgi had done, all Yeri could say was that it had worked. Sort of. The two unnies were on speaking terms again, which was what really mattered. Yeri had gotten tired of awkward lunches with one unnie on either side, neglecting to look at the other as if one look would cause imminent death. Anybody who thought like that deserved imminent death. Not really. Yeri loved her unnies in the end.

"They're so weird, hmm?" Yeri though aloud, watching Irene and Seulgi sit at a table at the edge of the cafeteria. Wendy had sent them off, insisting they spend some more time together to fix whatever had been broken in the first place.

"You love them," said Joy, watching Irene and Seulgi just as intently. "I'm just glad they're talking again."

"Me too." Wendy munched some snacks. "Well, I guess it's getting better."

The three watched as Irene and Seulgi's bout of laughter, short-lived, died and left a silence in its place. Irene and Seulgi turned away from each other before facing the other again, mouth open to speak. They giggled again before Irene surrendered and Seulgi began talking.

"How bizarre," commented Yeri. She didn't understand them. She hadn't really understood the whole argument or whatever in the first place. All she knew was that Seulgi and Irene had been sad, and neither had been willing to talk. She knew that both had been acting weird, and then suddenly, one school day, they started talking again.

"Do we even know why they were fighting?" Joy asked. She stole one of Wendy's chips.

"Hey!" Wendy protested, jerking the bag back towards her body and hugging it protectively against her chest. "Mine!"

"Blah, blah," Yeri said, taking a chip of her own while Wendy focused her attention on Joy.

"Yah! You two," Wendy sighed, shaking her head. "And no, Joy. We don't."

"Too bad. Guess we'll never know."

"Probably better not to ask," said Yeri. Joy nodded and stole another chip.

"Yah! Park Sooyoung!"

Meanwhile, Irene held tightly onto Seulgi's bicep, laughing. Her stomach hurt so bad and she couldn't contain any laughter no matter how hard she tried. 

"Seulgi-ah," Irene said, breathing hard. It'd been several days since they talked in the coffee shop, mulling things over and deciding to try their best; If not for them, then for their friends. Irene and Seulgi, both wanting to fix their relationship but not knowing how, felt better, though things were far from the same. Irene finally stopped laughing, a sudden chill running down her spine. "You need to stop making me laugh. My stomach hurts."

"Okay, Hyun," Seulgi said, handing Irene a headphone. "Just one more video. I promise."

"No, no," said Irene, handing the headphone right back. "I think I'll puke if I laugh anymore."

Seulgi chuckled and abandoned the video idea. "Okay." She glanced back at their friends, who were suddenly very invested in whatever was in Wendy's hands. "Our friends keep watching."

"Um, yeah." Irene's head bobbed in agreement. "It's kind of weird."

"Very weird." Seulgi's half-smile made Irene warm inside. She'd missed Seulgi so much. "I feel like a kid being watched by her parents."

"Yeah..." Irene drifted off, watching Seulgi's face. Seulgi looked happy enough. Whether Seulgi was actually happy, though, Irene didn't know. "I really missed you, Seul. My Seul."

It felt so good to say that name again.  _Suck it, YooA._

Seulgi's eyes widened briefly before she said, "Y-yeah, Irene. I missed you too." Seulgi settled into a contented smile. "I really missed you."

Irene rested her head on Seulgi's shoulder and held onto Seulgi's hands, playing with her fingers. They were silent for a few minutes, feeling the eyes of their friends boring holes into the backs of their heads, expecting some sort of signal that things were okay or that things were very much not. However, to the three watchers' chagrin, there wasn't much happening besides basic skinship. They also had a limited view.

"Stupid! Why did you choose to sit by this pole?" Yeri smacked Joy.

"Me? It was Wendy!" Joy pointed at the culprit.

"Yah! Don't blame me for your stupidity!"

After the silence grew unbearable, Irene lifted her head to look up at her bear. "Seulgi."

"Yeah?" Irene felt Seulgi's body shift. It felt so real.

"Are we okay?"

Seulgi paused and looked down at Irene resting against her body. Seulgi's body felt warm. "I don't know, Hyun. Are we?"

"Yah," Irene said warningly, shoving Seulgi lightly. "You joke too much."

"Maybe you need to joke more."

"You joke enough for the both of us."

"And I'll continue to do so," said Seulgi, holding onto Irene's hands, "because yeah, we're okay."

Irene's smile spread to the edges of her face, threatening to spill off the sides. "I love you."

"I love you too." Seulgi hugged Irene close. "You know you're like my best friend, right?"

"Yes. You know you're like  _my_  best friend, right?" Irene weaved her fingers into Seulgi's sweater, fistfuls of wool feeling fluffy beneath her fingertips.

Seulgi confirmed that she knew with a kiss to Irene's forehead. "Rightfully so."

Wendy's eyebrows were about to shoot off her forehead. "What in the world?"

"Gay," Yeri said, dragging the word out for way longer than necessary.

"Shut up," said Joy, whose eyes remained trained on Seulgi and Irene. "We do that too."

Yeri thought about it. "Okay, yeah, but, like-"

"No buts," Wendy said. "That's that."

Yeri huffed. "But we don't look as gay as  _that_."

"We look the same, you dummy. You just say that because Seulgi's gay." Joy crossed her arms, waiting for Yeri's futile attempt at protesting.

"...No."

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Just shut up, Yeri."

 

Things were getting better and better, with awkward pauses and strange silences nearly all left in the past when YooA once again joined the picture. It had been a quiet Saturday afternoon, Seulgi texting Irene as she had begun to do more frequently, and Seulgi was frantic. 

YooA had confessed. Damn YooA had gone and goddamn confessed.

The news didn't come as a huge surprise to Irene, but she was displeased nonetheless. She didn't know YooA, but that girl didn't give off great vibes. For all Irene knew, YooA was some icy bitch waiting to drown Seulgi's heart in infinite sorrow. Irene's advice wasn't of much help, since girls with girls was different than guys with girls. Irene had never been confessed to by a girl before. Only guys. She had no idea what to do with YooA. She didn't even really know Seulgi's relationship with YooA. Just what were they, anyway? In the end, Seulgi was just as unsure of what to do as she was before texting Irene.

But boy, did Irene wish she'd tried harder to find a solution.

"Unnie," Seulgi had said to Irene as the two sat to the side of their rowdy friends. Wendy, Yeri, and Joy's attention was captured by the intense game of UNO in front of them.

"Yeah?" Irene's attention was also captured by the rapid throwing of cards. The pile was growing huge.

"I just want to tell you something."

"Go ahead, Seul. Just tell me." Damn, Joy really threw that plus-four card out there. Poor Wendy.

Seulgi lowered her voice for only Irene to hear. "YooA brought up the idea of a date again, and-"

"Again?" Irene interrupted, her attention snapping to Seulgi. "That bitch! She can't keep pressuring you-"

"Unnie, unnie," calmed Seulgi. Her embarrassed smile reminded Irene of how cute the bear was. "It's fine. She wasn't pressuring me, okay? She just brought up the idea of maybe watching a movie together or something, and she was kind of suggestive about it."

Irene huffed. YooA didn't take no for an answer, did she? "I'll go talk to her myself, Seul. I swear I'll knock some sense into her."

"Whoa there, Hyunnie." Seulgi's fingers wrapped around Irene's arms. "You don't need to. YooA is fine. Really."

Irene didn't relax and instead tightened in Seulgi's grasp. "I think YooA doesn't understand you."

"Well, then maybe she'll understand me better after our date." Seulgi trailed off at the end, the word "date" barely above a whisper.

" _Date_?" Irene repeats. She was angry then. Very angry. "You gave into that little vixen?"

"I wouldn't say  _gave in_  but-"

" _Kang Seulgi!_ " roared Irene, paralyzing the entire UNO game. Yeri's hand froze, mid-card-placement. "You can't let people push you around like this!"

"Eh?" Joy tuned into their conversation. "Seulgi-ah, what have you been up to?"

"Spill, Seulgi!" Yeri piped up.

"I'm listening," said Wendy, placing her cards down.

Seulgi sighed. Thanks, Irene. "I'm going on a date with YooA."

"Ooh!" Wendy whistled appreciatively. "Nice going, Seul!"

"Finally, you're going to get some," chortled Yeri.

"I need to get some," said Joy longingly. "I'll live vicariously through you, dear Seulgi-ssi."

"I'm glad you finally said yes to  _one_  of those fangirls of yours," Wendy said, picking up her cards again, seeing as the conversation was not terribly juicy. Just some good news. "I was afraid every girl was going to confess to you and find their heart broken in return."

Seulgi snorted. "Every girl? Do you have a confession to make, Wendy?"

"I do!" Joy and Yeri batted eyelashes at Seulgi with palms pressed together. "Oppa!"

"Disgusting," said Seulgi after a moment. She laughed at her ridiculous friends and didn't pay any mind to Wendy's lack of response.

"Is no one else going to say anything about how Seulgi is letting herself be  _pressured_  into this date?" Irene's incredulous tone made her voice crack up an octave. Yeri giggled.

Wendy frowned. "Pressure isn't okay, Seulgi."

"It's not pressure, Wan," explained Seulgi. "She's just persistent, and I finally gave in."

Joy's eyebrows furrowed in disbelief. "Sounds like pressure to me."

"Yup." Yeri had thrown in her two cents and was ready to play UNO again. Damn Joy and her damn plus-fours.

"I really do want to go on this date with her," said Seulgi firmly. "We are very, very close friends, and honestly? Romance isn't far from friendship. She deserves a chance because I know how amazing she is, and I know she'd be just as amazing as a girlfriend."

"Hmm, unnie," Yeri said to Irene. She supposed two more cents wouldn't hurt. "Looks like Seulgi's got things sorted out. Come on guys, let's finish up!"

Cards tapped against the ground as three friends furiously tried to win the card battle. Irene looked at Seulgi in shock, not processing clearly what she'd just heard. Seulgi sounded like she actually wanted to go on the date with YooA. Irene knew that YooA really had just pestered Seulgi so much that her brain had turned to mush with YooA, making her an easy target. Seulgi was a kind person, too kind, and she'd given in to the pressure. Irene knew that. There was no way Seulgi would actually like YooA. Nope.

 

"Bye, Seul," YooA said, kissing Seulgi's cheek. The older girl squeezed YooA's side before letting her go.

"See you."

"Whipped," whistled Joy.  She eyed her friend up and down and followed where Seulgi's eyes led. Whipped.

"What are you talking about?" Seulgi's shy side was showing.

"Kang Seulgi," tutted Joy. "Your fan club will be devastated."

"No, they won't," said Seulgi, taping a picture up in her locker. "There's nothing to be devastated over."

"Most eligible lesbian off the market? And you say there's nothing to be devastated over."

"We aren't official yet," reminded Seulgi, tapping Joy on the nose before fixing the photo. It looked a little crooked.

"It's been a month, hasn't it? Why are you taking it so slow?"

"I dunno," admitted Seulgi. "You'd think I'd been cuffed by now."

"And why aren't you? It's cuffing season." Joy's hands gestured aggressively.

"...She likes to go fast." Seulgi blushed, cheeks tinging with what Irene thought was the most perfect pink. Her best friend was so cute. "Very fast. It hasn't felt right, so taking things slow have been a way of testing our feelings and making sure this is real. I don't want to waste my time on something fake, you know? It's not that I doubt YooA likes me, but I wanted to make sure she liked me for more than this." Seulgi gestured to her body, hands not knowing exactly where to point. "She's so kind and thoughtful. It's nice to have someone who cares so much."

"What are your friends, chopped liver? Do we not care?" Joy's hand flew up to her forehead as she pretended to fall back in a faint.

"Ha, ha." Seulgi gave Joy a light push. "I just like her, that's all. I want to do things right."

"You'll be fine, Seul. It's not like this is your first girlfriend or anything."

"Yeah, I know, Joy, but it's been a while since I've last dated. You know I've been actively trying to  _not_  date."

"Love is love," Joy shrugged.

"Love is love," nodded Seulgi. She couldn't wait to see YooA after school.

Joy patted Seulgi on the shoulder and headed down the hallway once the bell rang to meet Sungjae in their now daily ritual. Free study was over.

"Oppa?" Joy asked, nudging the boy with her shoulder. "Want to head to history?"

"Y-yeah," Sungjae said, realizing who nudged him. He smiled at Joy a wide, eye smile that made Joy smile in return. Their beautifully matching expressions brightened the hallway's atmosphere by a million. "Let's go."

The two strode down the hallway, nearly shoulder-to-shoulder, their laughter heard echoing down the hall despite the raucous crowd that threatened to drown the pair out as students rushed off to classrooms.

That didn't matter though. The two were in their own world.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a new update! I hope the YooA development wasn't too quick. I just didn't find the development of her relationship with Seulgi to be particularly important since Irene's feelings toward the relationship are what I want readers to take away rather than the relationship itself. We all know who the endgame ship is anyway. Who are we kidding? On a serious note, Joy has some things happening on the side! Who Joy's true ship partner is has been something I have not yet been able to decide. Do I gay this fic out to the max or give some hetero representation? I have no idea.
> 
> Let me know your thoughts, and follow my Tumblr @sagwalli for author updates and more!


	8. Neglect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi wants to make it official with YooA, and Irene's feeling a little jealous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy this new update! I haven't proofread yet, so forgive me for any mistakes. As you can see, Homecoming is coming up, so watch out for some good old-fashioned hoco drama. And for you Joyri shippers, don't worry. I have not forsaken you. Or have I?
> 
> Just kidding. For now.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for supporting this fic. and please continue to leave comments!

"YooA, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Nope."

"Wannie, why are you making this so difficult?" Seulgi sighed after being fake rejected for the fiftieth time. "I think YooA would have said yes by now."

"You are so lame, Seul! Imagine you want to get a taste of all this, and you're trying to ask me like you are now? I would say no. If YooA says yes, she's too in love with you to see that she's about to date one lame ass bear." 

"A very lame ass bear." Yeri looked so serious that Seulgi would've thought she was at a funeral or something.

"Maybe you should ask Irene about this. After all, Bo Gum is the one who asked her to make it official. See why she said yes." Wendy's idea wasn't awful, but Seulgi had an inkling that Irene didn't like YooA. 

"I don't think that's a very good idea. Irene unnie doesn't like YooA," reminded Yeri. Seulgi made a mental note that it was a definite fact Irene didn't like YooA. For what reason, Seulgi didn't know. She wasn't great at guessing either.

"Oh, really?" Seulgi asked, hoping to get an answer from either friend.

"Yup," said Yeri, "Beats me why, though."

"Me too."

Seulgi sighed. It was worth a try. "I think I'll stick with my original plan."

"But that's so lame," complained Yeri.

"Sucks to suck," Seulgi said to her before getting up. "There she is."

"Why is our unnie so lame?" Yeri watched Seulgi tap YooA on the shoulder. 

"Your unnie, not mine," said Wendy. "We're the same age."

"Right." Yeri could practically see the light coming off YooA's beaming smile. It was blinding, and it was shooting lasers into Yeri's eyes. "Looked like it worked though."

"Yeah..."

Yeri raised an eyebrow. "You okay, unnie?"

Wendy's head snapped up. "Of course, Yerimmie. Why wouldn't I be?"

Yeri turned back towards Seulgi and YooA. YooA's arms were wrapped tightly around Seulgi's waist, face snuggled up against the crook of Seulgi's neck. Yeri glanced sideways at her unnie, whose eyes remained glued to the PDA sight ahead of them. Finally, Yeri responded, "Okay, unnie. Okay."

Wendy's eyes left the sight before her just momentarily to fall on Irene, whose nose scrunched up at YooA's unnecessary affection. Wendy observed Irene's nose twitch like a bunny, a cute bunny, and she saw Irene turn on her heel and flee before YooA could amp up the PDA any more. Wendy swore that if Seulgi let her, YooA would sex Seulgi up right then and there on the floor for everyone to see. Wendy shuddered at the thought of seeing her friend naked. Gross. After Irene was gone, Wendy sighed and bit her lip. Irene really hated YooA.

Everyone could see it.

Irene didn't even really bother addressing the elephant in the room and just huffed whenever YooA was mentioned. She always turned her nose and tried to change the topic. Wendy had caught Irene staring daggers at Seulgi's now-official girlfriend on more than one occasion. When Wendy tried to bring it up, Irene waved her off and just kept saying that she didn't have a good feeling about the girl. Wendy would drop the subject and let her unnie go on with whatever she was doing, but Wendy was curious.

Green wasn't Irene's color.

Vines of ivy jealousy intertwined with Irene's fingers and shot out to wrap around Seulgi. Irene was jealous, alright. Whenever Seulgi blew them off to go hang out with YooA, Wendy felt a pang of sadness too. They didn't see as much of Seulgi as they used to, but it wasn't awful. Seulgi only hung out with YooA as often as Wendy thought she should. After all, they were in a romantic relationship. Seulgi still kept her word and hung out with her friends from time to time. It was only once or twice where Seulgi had canceled to meet up with YooA, usually with a good reason. Wendy thought Seulgi was doing great. Wasn't she? Even when she was busy, Wendy would just hang out with Irene or something. Wendy had been seeing a lot of Irene lately, and it was kind of nice. At least they had each other if not Seulgi. Everything worked out. So how come Irene was being so weird about it?

Wendy didn't know. But she was going to find out.

 

"Oppa," Joy said, waving a hand in front of Sungjae's face. "Did you hear what I said?"

Sungjae blinked and turned to look at the smiling girl next to him. "Ah... Sorry, no."

Joy sighed and tutted. "Oppa-yah, I was talking to you about Homecoming."

"Right, right," Sungjae said, nodding. "Uh... What about it?"

Joy bopped his nose. "Pay attention to me, oppa. What're you looking at? I don't like to share." Joy looked around and honed in on Yeri, whose eyes were locked with Sungjae. "Yah, what is that Squirtle doing, distracting you? Doesn't she have anything better to do?"

"..."

"Kim Yerim-ah," Joy waved a hand in front of her face, "What the hell are you doing?"

"Making sure he doesn't try anything funny," Yeri replied, her eyes not leaving Sungjae's for even a moment. Sungjae gulped.

"More like ruining my chances," hissed Joy. "Go and find poor Wannie or something. I bet she's lonely."

"I think she's off trying to mooch fangirls off Seulgi," Yeri said dismissively. "Won't work, but that's never stopped her."

"Greasy Seungwan," sighed Joy. "What about Irene?"

"With Bo Gum."

"Seulgi?"

"YooA."

"Well," Joy tried to think of something for Yeri to do, "go find a boy of your own."

"But Joy-"

"No buts," said Joy. "Off you go." She said the last sentence through gritted teeth and jabbed a finger at the door. "Anyway, where were we?"

"Does she not like me?" asked Sungjae.

"Oh, don't worry about her, oppa," said Joy. She looped an arm through his. "So, about Homecoming..."

 

"He asked me!" Joy proudly showed her friends the sign that had been presented to her only moments prior.

"We missed it?" Seulgi groaned. "Damn."

"He said he didn't tell any of you," said Joy. She admired the poster board sign, beautifully painted with a rainbow of colors splattering delicate gold lettering.

"And I don't know why he didn't," Yeri said disdainfully. "Now we've all missed it."

"Blah, blah, Yeri," Joy said before pointing at her sign. The handwriting was so neat that she wanted to frame it and hang it in her room. Or just hang it. Framing was kind of expensive. "Look at this, here. He made a pun! Isn't that cute?"

"Wow, very cute," Wendy said, holding up the sign by the other corner. She gave Sungjae's decorating skills an A plus.

"Joy is getting herself a man!" Irene jostled Joy's shoulder playfully. Yeri gave a tight smile at the gesture. Great. Another friend asked, and Yeri was still going solo. No boys for her; not that she was complaining.

"Maybe." Joy beamed and shrugged with a smug grin plastered on her boy-crazed face. Yeri wrinkled her nose. What was the hype?

Yeri turned to Seulgi and said, "Unnie, when are you asking YooA?"

Joy gave Seulgi a strange look. "You haven't even asked her yet?" Joy could've sworn it already happened.

"I mean," slowly started Seulgi, "I guess it was bound to happen since we're dating, but I haven't actually asked yet. I want it to be special."

"Aw, come here, you," Wendy said, pinching Seulgi's baby cheeks. "You're so cute and sentimental."

"I want her to remember it," Seulgi said, ducking Wendy's second attempt to touch her face. "I feel like she'd like something bigger."

"Go big or go home," Joy agreed. She cuffed Seulgi around the neck. "So grown up."

"Yah, you're younger than me!" Seulgi protested, wrestling out of Joy's grasp only to have Wendy's fingers shoot out and pinch a cheek.

Irene giggled at the scene before her. Seulgi always got picked on, usually by the maknae of their group, Yeri, who was always roasting the girl. Whenever Irene thought Yeri was finally done with her roasts, Yeri would pull another one out of her apparently never-ending supply and flame Seulgi again right then and there. Poor Seul. Wendy, greasy Wendy, and flirtatious Joy always joined in, teasing Seulgi until her breaking point. It was all in the name of good fun. Seulgi never seemed to mind, and even when you'd think she was about to blow, she'd laugh and shake it off, giving her friends a playful shove back or throwing out a comeback of her own.

Irene liked that about Seulgi. She always bounced back. No one else could her down except herself, and it took a very strong will to do that. Irene had always admired Seulgi's strong sense of self and lack of need for reassurance. She was so confident and cool. No wonder she had fangirls (and fanboys) around every corner of the school. Irene never knew how she did it, the laidback attitude and social butterfly personality combined with a friendly smile. It seemed too tiring. But of course, Seulgi never let it show if the whole popularity thing did tire her out. She'd just bounce back and keep going. 

Keep going. About that...

Irene's mouth tightened into a line as she thought hard. She smiled the so-called "white person" smile that plagued the internet, and while Yeri stared at her peculiarity, the younger girl stayed silent.

Seulgi kept going. Even though she'd been spending less and less time with Irene, she'd kept going. Irene didn't like that. What happened to being best friends? Forever? Forever seemed to be getting shorter and shorter; closer and closer.

Too close.

 

Irene found herself in the warm embrace of her boyfriend's arms at the end of the day. Bo Gum always made her feel better. He was like her center, her gravity. He didn't change. He loved her, she loved him, and he was always there for her. He was all Irene could ever ask for, but he wasn't Seulgi.

A girl still needed her friends, you know? All of them.

"Baby," Bo Gum said, tapping Irene's shoulder.

"I thought I told you not to call me that," Irene murmured. Bo Gum suddenly didn't feel so warm anymore. "I don't like it."

"Oh, right," Bo Gum scratched the back of his head, "sorry."

"Just remember it next time." Irene wrapped her arms around herself.

"Hey, Irene, look at me," Bo Gum said, taking Irene's chin in between two fingers. "What's wrong?"

"N-nothing."

"Doesn't sound like nothing to me."

"You're right," sighed Irene. "I just have a lot on my mind."

"You know you can always talk to me, right? I'm your boyfriend. I'm here for you."

"I... I know. It's just... Seulgi's being spending so much time with YooA lately."

"And?"

"What do you mean, 'and?'" Irene furrowed her brows. "Seulgi's spending so much time with the girl that I never see her anymore."

"I'm sure it's just their honeymoon phase," assured Bo Gum. He stroked Irene's hair and rubbed her back. "They're a brand new couple. They need time."

"But what about  _me_ , Bo Gum? Her best friend? Hello?" Irene hadn't thought she was that mad, but after saying Seulgi's spending too much time with YooA, it was like a dam had broken within Irene, allowing all her pent-up anger to flow flee. "I feel like I haven't seen her in weeks."

"You'll hang out soon," promised Bo Gum. "Have you tried making plans with her?"

"Yeah," huffed Irene. "She's always busy or already has plans with YooA."

"Ah... At least she isn't blowing you off?"

"She can't blow me off if we never make plans."

Bo Gum shrugged apologetically. "I tried." He screwed his face up in thought, contemplating deeply what his girlfriend was saying. He didn't like seeing her distressed, and lately, Irene had been  _very_  stressed. "You know, Seulgi probably felt like this, too, when we first started dating."

Irene reflected fondly on the beginning of their relationship. Bo Gum had been such a gentleman, bringing her roses and the like. But the first time they'd ever met, things had been very awkward. Bo Gum had bowed many times, Irene bowing back, and they'd eventually clunked heads. A painful experience, but, nonetheless, a stepping stone for their relationship. Bo Gum had felt so awful about nearly giving Irene a concussion that he insisted on taking her out to eat. What was it that he'd said? Oh, right.

_Bo Gum felt absolutely terrible, and his head was throbbing. He grabbed onto the falling girl and after apologizing profusely, said, "I'm so sorry! Please, let me take you out to dinner. It's the least I can do."_

_"Don't worry about it, Bo Gum-ssi. My head is fine."_

_"Seriously, okay? I can't just hit a pretty girl in the head and not treat her to a meal. I can't be that rude."_

_"Did you call me pretty?" Irene smiled at the flustered boy in front of her. He was kind of cute, in a boyish way, with a round face and fluffy hair._

_"Uh..." Bo Gum gaped at Irene, unsure of how to respond._

_"It's a date," said Irene, taking his phone from his pocket. She added her contact info and left, leaving him staring wordlessly after her, a female silhouette shrinking in the distance._

"What do you mean, 'felt like this?'" Irene asked.

"You know, felt like she was being neglected." Bo Gum kissed Irene's forehead. "Just talk to her, Irene. I'm sure she's just on a high from her new relationship."

"...Okay."

"Everything will work out. You'll see." Bo Gum kissed Irene on the lips. "You'll see."

Irene sure hoped so.

 


	9. Pushed to the Edge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things are easy to fix while other things are a whole lot more complicated.

Seulgi came out of the closet (oh, the irony) with a bouquet of red roses. She motioned for the violinists to stop playing and got down on one knee, saying to the awestruck girl before her, "YooA, will you go to Homecoming with me?"

"What?" YooA asked, confused. She took a step forward, and her face suddenly changed into one that was too familiar. "I'm Irene."

"Ah!" Seulgi woke up with a start, beads of sweat forming on her forehead. She exhaled and wiped the sweat with the back of her hands. "What the heck?" She swung her legs over the side of the bed and began getting ready for school. What kind of dream was that? Asking Irene to Homecoming?  _With roses?_ She had a damn boyfriend, and Seulgi was supposed to be asking YooA! Seulgi breathed deeply to slow her beating heart. That dream had freaked her out way too much. Seulgi didn't know what to make of it. She didn't know what to make of the dream. She thought about it more, gave up, and pushed the thoughts to the back of her mind. She'd figure it out some other time.

When she entered the school, a poster in one hand and flowers in the other, Joy happily skipped out to meet her, Yeri trailing closely behind.

"So? When is she coming, lovebug?"

Seulgi glanced up at the clock on the wall above the vending machine. "Five minutes."

"Lights, camera, action," Joy said, shooting finger guns at Seulgi with a wink.

Yeri and Joy ducked behind the nearby trash cans, who knows why they chose that spot, with their phones at the ready to capture the momentous occasion. Seulgi stood there and plucked at her sleeve nervously. She was anxious to ask YooA and get it over with. She knew that her girlfriend would say yes. She was her  _girlfriend._ But, no matter. Seulgi still felt like she was going to have a heart attack.

_When you walk in the door, I open my mouth to speak. I ask you to Homecoming: "Irene-"_

Seulgi immediately stopped thinking to mentally beat herself up. _What the hell, Seulgi? You have to stop thinking about that stupid dream!_ Seulgi smacked her forehead. She was about to ask YooA to Homecoming any minute now, yet she was thinking about asking Irene. Seulgi prayed she didn't screw up. YooA was one miracle in her life that she didn't need taken away. Not now, of all times.

When YooA walked in, Seulgi's mouth went dry. She cleared her throat and stepped forward with her sign, wiping all traces of her mischevious thoughts away. Determined to begin with a clean slate, Seulgi looked into the eyes of her loving girlfriend and began,

"Irene-"

_Fuck._

In that instant, Seulgi had never regretted anything more. She wished she could take it all back. All of it. If YooA's fallen expression and shocked wide eyes didn't break Seulgi's heart, the single tear that dripped from YooA's eye did. Seulgi watched helplessly as it splashed onto the floor, quickly disappearing with no trace except for the slight glare that was visible only from certain angles. 

"YooA, YooA," Seulgi pleaded as YooA turned to leave.

"Let go, Seul," YooA said, sniffling. She wrestled herself free from Seulgi's grip and fled down the hall, her now full-body sobs echoing back at Seulgi. The sound was faint, and the sound of the students that flooded the main area blended into the background. Seulgi felt like she was underwater. She couldn't hear anything; not the chatter, the principal's voice over the speaker, or her friends yelling into her face. Nothing.

"Seulgi! Hey!" Joy resorted to slapping her bear-like friend. Seulgi blinked, slowly coming out of her daze. Everything was blurry and hazy. Seulgi didn't get why.

"Are you okay?" Yeri, for some reason, maybe because of some random burst of kindness, decided against sarcasm and instead opted for comfort. She hugged her unnie's waist and slowly took the sign from her hands, handing it to Joy. "Everything will be fine, Seulgi. It'll be okay."

Seulgi just nodded numbly. Who knew you could fuck up that bad?

 

"Repeat that?" Irene couldn't believe what she just heard. "She said what?"

"Yup," Yeri said almost sullenly. She missed Seulgi, the girl who she'd always had the tiniest bit of a crush on. Well, it was less of a crush and more of a strong attachment and sense of protectiveness that almost mirrored a crush. It was hard to explain, but Yeri had always thought of it as a tiny crush. A friend crush. A friend crush on someone who was already her friend. Yes. "She tried asking YooA to Homecoming, and your name came out instead."

Irene was slightly uncomfortable under Yeri's heated gaze. "Um... Yeri-ah, are you okay?"

"Hmm?" Yeri's eyebrows rose. "Yes, of course." Yeri loved Irene -- her mom, her friends would say -- so she bucked up and shoved her feelings back down. Yeri just missed Seulgi a lot, and it was starting to show. "I felt really bad for YooA." Yeri really did. "She just kind of stood there and then moved to leave, but Seulgi grabbed onto her and pleaded with her to stay. YooA must've been really hurt because she didn't lash out and instead just told Seulgi to let go of her and then left crying. No fight, no nothing. Seulgi's in over her head, that's for sure."

"Oh, Seul," Irene murmured out loud. On the inside, though, her mind raced to try and come up with a possible explanation for Seulgi's total fuck up. The whole situation made Irene's stomach's flip. However, maybe YooA would finally get out of Seulgi's life. And out of Irene's.

"Yeah..." Yeri rubbed her arm from her elbow up to her shoulder contemplatively. "Anyway, unnie, I just thought that you should know."

"Why?"

"We all know you don't like YooA. It's not a secret."

Irene's cheeks burned with embarrassment. She hadn't meant to come off so strong. "Ah, well, Seulgi's attention is always on her."

"But you're not mad at Seulgi?"

"I-" Irene stopped herself. "Not as much." Yeri gave Irene a hard look. "What?"

"Why  _do_  you hate YooA?" Yeri asked quizzically. She too got annoyed with the girl, but she didn't  _hate_  Seulgi's girlfriend. YooA seemed pretty nice, anyway, On several occasions, she'd even brought Yeri food. That was always nice. Seulgi, of course, was YooA's priority, but YooA still thought of Seulgi's friends. YooA steered clear of Irene though. YooA had offered Irene peace offerings before, but Irene always gave a cold stare or deadpan response in return, accepting the gifts with a stiff hand.

"I don't  _hate_  her..." Irene said carefully. "Hate is a strong word."

"Okay, then why do you strongly dislike her?"

"..."

"Are you jealous of YooA?"

"What? No, why?" Irene spoke way too quickly.

Yeri pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows, giving Irene the most skeptical of looks. Damn, maknae. Nothing escaped her eye. "Irene-unnie, you're jealous."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"No."

"Yes-" Irene scowled and shoved Yeri. "Fuck."

"Got you~" 

"Shut up. Fine. I'm jealous."

"Aw, unnie. Don't be."

"I don't  _want_ to be. I just am. Seulgi spends all the time in the world with YooA, doesn't she? Don't tell me you haven't noticed too. Where does Seulgi go for all her problems? Who is Seulgi with every minute, every hour of the day? When Seulgi needs to talk, who does she text? Who has to make plans because the other never does?  _Us_ , Yeri. I always text her first, ask her first, because she doesn't come to me anymore. She has someone else now. Does that answer your question?" Irene stared at the floor, a numbness spreading through her body. "She has a new priority."

Yeri thought about what Irene said before replying slowly, "Don't you think it's only natural that they spend so much time with each other? They're dating, after all."

"I know they are, and they should spend time together but _Yeri_ , at the expense of us? Her friends? There's no balance. Just her. All her."

Yeri's hopeful smile disappeared. "I mean, you're right, unnie, but are you sure there's nothing more?"

"What do you mean?" Irene's tone turned defensive.

"Ah, n-nothing."

"Better be nothing."

"...Okay."

 

When Bo Gum asked her to Homecoming, you'd think he'd asked her hand in marriage with all the roars that had erupted. A large crowd had accumulated, all anxiously waiting for Irene's inevitable yes and then cheering when that answer came. Bo Gum's friends had all patted him on the back and hooted raucously as Irene just smiled, putting on a show. Amongst the crowd, three familiar faces took part in the overly extravagant festivities. One was missing, no doubt off with a certain bane of Irene's existence.

No matter. Irene had other things to focus on.

"I love you, Irene," Bo Gum murmured for her ears only as he pulled her in for a hug.

"I... I love you too." Irene's voice came out too flat, too emotionless, and Bo Gum suddenly let go, concerned.

"You hesitated."

"You know I have a lot on my mind."

"Yes, but..." Bo Gum searched her face for a sign of sincerity. Anything. But Irene proved too hard to read, and his insecurity found no comfort in her warning stare. "Okay. Just know I love you."

"And I," Irene stood on the tips of her toes to press a kiss to his lips, "you." Bo Gum grinned at the gesture, which earned a round of thunderous applause from the onlookers.

 

"Where were you earlier?" Wendy asked the girl, who danced effortlessly in front of the mirror as sweat dripped down her body.

"Did I miss something?"

"Don't play coy," Wendy said, pausing the music just as Seulgi was about to pop to the drop of the beat.

"Hey!"

Wendy crossed her arms. She'd already talked to Irene and heard a spiel nearly identical to the one Yeri had listened to. "Bo Gum told us when he was going to do it. So, where were you?"

"That's none of your business." Seulgi went to press play on the stereo. A deep bass sound reverberated through the room, and Wendy could feel it in her chest next to the bubbling anger.

"None of my business?" Wendy shouted over the music. "Where were you, Seul? Just answer the question!"

Seulgi sighed and stopped the music before lazily indulging Wendy. "With YooA, alright? Happy?"

It took a lot of self-control to not explode. "Yeah. I am."

"I know it's bad, so don't tell me again."

"But why, Seulgi? Why didn't you come when you knew-?"

"I got distracted."

"By YooA."

"Don't look at me like that."

Wendy fixed her increasingly judgmental stare, returning to a more neutral look, and cleared her throat. "Is she that much more important that you blew off Irene to see her?"

"Irene has you guys."

"But  _you're_  the one who keeps skipping out," Wendy argued. "You're the one she looks for now."

"And I have no idea why. She's having plenty of fun hanging out with you."

"What?"

"Every time I see her and we talk about what she's been up to, it always involves you. Wendy and Irene, huh? I feel like I hear about you more than I hear about Bo Gum at this point."

Wendy couldn't hold back a guffaw. "Ha! Bo Gum is still number one."

"Exactly, Wan. She doesn't need me, and she probably doesn't even need you, so stop trying to act like her knight in shining armor. If she cared, she'd come find me. She'd be the one yelling at me right now."

"But Seul-"

"No."

"Friends! We're her friends!"

"She's just mad because she's getting a taste of her own medicine."

"So you do understand what you've been doing." Wendy narrowed her eyes at Seulgi, who realized she slipped up.

"Doesn't matter if I do."

"Of course it matters! You've purposely been doing this, haven't you? Skipping out? Ditching?"

"Who cares!"

"Me! Irene! We all care," Wendy yelled and shook Seulgi by her shoulders. "Can't you see?"

"No, I can't, so leave me alone. Why are you trying to defend her so adamantly, Wannie? Do you like her or something?"

"What the hell, Seul? That's a damn low blow, you know that!" Wendy was seething, her skin prickling with anger.

"Then _leave_."

"What were you even doing with YooA that was so important, huh? So important that you ditched us?"

"Don't act so high and mighty. I had to say sorry somehow. She was still pissed at me for the... ask," Seulgi stumbled over her words, flustered, before sizing up Wendy. "You really want to know? Don't push me, Wannie." Seulgi's expression hardened.

"You know what? Yeah, I do. Cough it up. What was so important?"

Seulgi stood very close to Wendy. She bent down to Wendy's eye level, held up two fingers together and thrust them up into the air. "This." 

"I-" Wendy was at a loss for words, stunned by her friend's uncharacteristically coarse behavior.

"And guess what?" Seulgi leaned in as if she was about to kiss Wendy, their lips nearly touching. "It was fucking good."

Wendy was left standing in the dance studio, mouth agape, breathing heavily with her back pressed up against the wall, as the door slammed shut with a loud thud that made Wendy jump. She couldn't believe that had happened. Was that even real? She'd never seen Seulgi like that before. When she finally regained her composure, she clapped her forehead with one hand and said to herself, "That's definitely one way to apologize."


	10. Started from the Bottom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seulgi's feeling a little overwhelmed, and she remembers what life used to be like. Simpler, maybe. Very different. But YooA makes it okay.

Seulgi scuffed her shoe against the concrete and leaned against the fence by the tennis courts. She sighed and pressed her forehead to her palms. Why the fuck did she do that? The look on Wendy's face...

Seulgi didn't want to think about it. Actually, it was Wendy's fault. Right? Seulgi was just minding her own business. Wendy was being all stuck-up and nosy. Seulgi had her own problems, not that Wendy had seemed to care. Irene this, Irene that. It made Seulgi want to puke.

Seulgi knew she hadn't been seeing much of Irene lately. Whose fault was it, really? Seulgi let the sunlight soak into her skin as she thought. It's not that she'd been _avoiding_ Irene, per say, but things were complicated. Seulgi was a busy woman. She had dance practice to attend, basketball season to prepare for, and a girlfriend to take care of. This was all on top of academics and schoolwork.

And the emotional stuff. Ugh. Why were emotions so complicated?

Every day, emotions made Seulgi tired, stressed, happy, and then stressed again. It was just so exhausting.

YooA had made for a nice distraction. She was like a ray of light in the darkness of Seulgi's life. Behind the facade of carefree popularity lurked Seulgi's inner self, the one she hid. For good reason. It was too much for Seulgi, so why would it be any less for someone else? YooA was so kind, and nice, and smart, and pretty, and talented. Seulgi could on and on. YooA certainly knew what to do with her hands, too. Seulgi had gotten her fair share over the days. Even though the relationship had begun slowly, an official status had sent them spiraling out of control and jumping from zero to one hundred real quick on the dating meter. Seulgi guessed they just kind of clicked, so the two had taken that step in their relationship. Multiple times.

Seulgi hadn't been bluffing to Wendy.

Thinking of Wendy again brought Seulgi back to Irene, dear Irene. Seulgi hadn't hung out with her in a long time. But whenever Seulgi was free, Irene was off with Bo Gum or doing student council stuff or whatever. Irene was busy too, and even though she wouldn't admit it, she was her own form of popular.

Irene had her fanboys and commanded an air of respect as Class President. She was intelligent off the charts and could be incredibly scary. One serious look from her rendered a room silent, especially after a signature shush. Just one shush was enough to turn the volume from 100 to -10. That's how quiet it would get.

People admired her from afar. Seulgi could tell. Maybe you had to be on the outside to notice, but it used to be that Seulgi would trail by Irene in the shadow of her delicate beauty. Boys would nod shyly at Irene in greeting, eyes wide when Irene would wave back in response. It was as if Irene was blessing them with one small interaction and for many, it was enough. Irene had held some sort of mystique that drew people to her like a moth to flame. Everybody wanted to know who she was. Who _she_ was. Not the friend that was always with her.

That was before Seulgi glowed up, turning from a small, slightly chubby freshman into a rock hard abs-olute hottie with a body. Once the baby fat dropped, Seulgi's face matured, though still very round. Her gaze, instead of shy, turned intense, the slant of her monolid eyes nearly smoldering people's clothes. That's how people began to view her. Seulgi was a new hot thing, a commodity of sorts. Everybody wanted a piece. The girls who began to look Seulgi's way were straight out of Seulgi's fantasies. She never could've imagined that her, Kang Seulgi, could ever be popular.

Popular. It was still weird to think about.

There'd always been a lopsided ratio of girls to boys who'd become enamored with Seulgi. In that way, at least. Not that Seulgi minded. Her closeted self had screamed on the inside but stayed hidden until now.

She still couldn't believe she was out. _With a girlfriend_. Girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend,

Seulgi loved the way the title sounded. She loved to say it, to let YooA know she was hers. To actually have a girlfriend was so unworldly. The fact that not only did girls actually find her attractive but wanted to date her still astonished her from time to time. She relished in the attention. She was only human, after all. But the popularity didn't help the fact that the relationship between her and her friends, even if they hadn't said anything, had definitely soured. Seulgi was unsatisfied, and she found comfort in her girlfriend. Girlfriend. Seulgi really loved that.

Seulgi couldn't blame them, but her friends were always busy. Seulgi was busy, and her friends were busy. In her free time, she gravitated towards YooA the most, but wasn't that only natural? They were dating, after all. Plus, Irene had Bo Gum, and clingy Wendy otherwise. Joy was all over Sungjae, and Yeri was off probably causing some sort of trouble. Seulgi liked spending time with her friends, but her instinct now just made her think of YooA. Plus, as her girlfriend, YooA was obliged to deal with Seulgi, and it was a given that she'd want to spend time with Seulgi.

Seulgi hated being clingy, and the whole arrangement really worked out. Seulgi didn't feel needy or weird, she just felt right. YooA felt right.

When it came to her friends, they'd always been busy. Wannie flirted her way through middle school and hadn't stopped once she reached high school. Besides that. she was a goofball who constantly hung around anyone who was free. Joy had always enjoyed flirting as well, her conquests more serious. Unlike Wendy, Joy had actually decided to date a few lucky people over the years. Wendy had been dashing from girl to girl before Seulgi even really understood what a crush was like, leaving each before anything turned serious. Wendy had never really cared about serious relationships anyway. She'd always said she'd think about that later in life. They were all still young.

Seulgi's bottom lip poofed out in a frown thinking about Wendy. She decided she'd deal about that later. Seulgi didn't want any more problems than she already had with Irene. Irene. Irene used to be more a quiet girl who kept to herself. That was, until people began to flock. If she didn't come to them, then they came to her. Before long, she'd been forced into the spotlight. Being the girl she was, Irene adjusted to the admiration and lived her life half in the limelight, still containing herself enough to be true to her original homebody personality. Irene had never been _that_ much of a party girl. She was someone who'd rather stay in and cook, maybe snuggle, and on a good day, iron some clothes. Irene seldom was the one to initiate going to a party. That just wasn't her scene. But with all the people (mostly boys) who surrounded her, Irene kind of had to, in a way, attend parties. Going to events was part of popularity, part of the game. Irene won in the end, Seulgi guessed, because Irene was Class President. Seulgi had always thought Irene would've won without. She captured attention so easily and with her brains, Seulgi was sure she'd have had a show-stopping speech that would've made everyone vote for her without the popularity.

Last but not least, was Yeri. Kim Yerim. The little one.

That devious little devil had been causing trouble since day one with all her little tricks. She loved her unnies, but she wasn't going to wait around for them all day. If they weren't free, she'd go off to make her own fun. Since her mind was usually occupied with ideas for mischief, Yeri didn't speak much about love. Seulgi had always wondered what really went through the maknae's head and whether deep beneath that devilish surface, there was pain too. It wasn't a very Yeri thing to just talk about her feelings like that. Nobody bothered pressing her about it, either. But Seulgi still wondered.

Tilting her head up to the sky, Seulgi watched a fluffy white cloud in the shape of a very bizarre-looking dog float slowly across the bright blue sky. The weather was so nice, and Seulgi liked feeling the sun's warm embrace, a light breeze blowing strands of hair from Seulgi's face. She'd been standing there for a while thinking about her friends, so she checked her phone.

"Peek-a-boo."

"I know it's you, YooA," smiled Seulgi as she plucked the hand that covered her eyes. "I was wondering when you'd bother showing up."

"Hey, not fair," YooA said lightheartedly, giving Seulgi a small shove. "I had a meeting after school."

"Too long of a meeting," complained Seulgi. She stayed up against the fence and grabbed YooA around the waist, turning her around and pulling her until her body was flush with Seulgi's own. "I was starting to miss you."

"You're such a big baby." YooA leaned back against Seulgi and reached up to give the taller girl a peck on the cheek. "It hasn't even been long since I've seen you."

"I don't care. I always want to see you."

"Oh, stop. What if somebody sees us?" YooA attempted to dodge the incoming flurry of kisses that Seulgi began planting down her jaw. "Seul!"

"Nobody's around," Seulgi said, hugging YooA tighter. YooA giggled and allowed Seulgi some leeway before gripping Seulgi's hands and escaping her grasp.

"I said no, Seul. People might see."

"You don't want them to?" Seulgi waggled her eyebrows, making YooA laugh.

"You're so weird."

"You love it."

YooA rolled her eyes at Seulgi's dopey smile. "Maybe, but I'd rather things like this stay between us," YooA touched her own chest with a finger before touching Seulgi's, "instead of between all of us." When she said "all," the pressure disappeared from Seulgi's chest and YooA gestured towards the school building. "And I'd really, _really_ rather that we save all this for later." YooA's finger returned to Seulgi and began trailing down her body. Seulgi glanced down and followed its trail with her eyes, waiting in anticipation to see how low it dared to travel. "You've had a lot already."

"I'd like more."

"And you'll _get_ more, _later_." YooA tucked her finger into Seulgi's waistband and pulled outwards only a bit before releasing, causing Seulgi's pants to snap lightly against her skin. "Don't be greedy."

"Alright, alright." Seulgi pulled YooA back into her arms. "I still want to hold you, though."

"Why?"

"Because I like to. Your body just fits so well against mine."

"Maybe we're just meant for each other." YooA looked up at Seulgi with a sly grin creeping onto her face.

"Maybe."

"Is it weird to think I used to just be one of your random acquaintances? Just some girl who you won't bat your eyes at even once?"

"Hey, don't say that." Seulgi squeezed YooA's side with one hand. "I've always found you beautiful. It just took one confession to make me do something about it."

"No, no, don't lie," YooA said. "You didn't do anything about that letter, remember?"

"Ah..."

"I even had to ask you out a few times before you said yes. Now that I think about it, why were you so reluctant?" YooA's hands rested over Seulgi's, which wrapped around the small girl's front. YooA involuntarily tightened her grip on Seulgi's hands.

"I've never really dated before, you know," Seulgi said carefully. She rubbed circles into YooA's palm. "It's scary."

YooA didn't say anything for a moment, and Seulgi wanted patiently for a reply, hoping she hadn't just indirectly called YooA scary or something like that. Mad YooA was not something Seulgi wanted to see.

"I guess you're right," YooA finally said. "Is it so scary now?"

"Scary? With you?" Seulgi kissed YooA's check. "Never."

"Good," YooA said as Seulgi's nose brushed against her neck. "Let's keep it that way."

"Aye, aye, Captain."

When Irene saw what looked like Seulgi and YooA PDA, she immediately turned around.

"What's wrong?"

"On second thought, let's go... to the music room!" Irene said as she wracked her brain for another place to hang. Clearly, the tennis courts were taken.

"Music room? Are you okay? Why'd you change your mind?"

 _No! Don't try and look up there,_ Irene internally pleaded. Irene looked into concerned eyes and sighed. Should she mention Seulgi? She didn't want to have a conversation about Seulgi and mentioning Seulgi almost certainly meant more conversation about Seulgi. Maybe some psychoanalyzing, some life advice that was probably helpful but very unwanted. Irene just didn't want to think about Seulgi kind of ditching her.

"Yup, I'm fine," Irene said, trying to hurry away. "Totally fine. Let's go."

Wendy hesitated a second before going to catch the older girl. Wendy didn't know why Irene didn't just say she saw Seulgi and YooA, probably doing something dirty, and that she didn't want to see it. Wendy found that to be totally understandable. PDA, in Wendy's mind, was fine, but Wendy also wasn't the biggest fan of viewing ten minutes straight of sucking face. From what it looked like, Seulgi and YooA were very close to doing so.

Wendy didn't want to push Irene, not when they'd been seeing each other so much, and so she didn't mention it. She figured Irene was just trying to save her from having to witness the PDA, but that window had passed. Wendy caught up to Irene, who walked rather quickly, forcing Wendy to keep up.

"So, music room?"

"Yup, music room."

Wendy just nodded at Irene's words. It felt kind of awkward. Maybe Irene was just mad at Seulgi. Wendy herself was a little annoyed with Seulgi's earlier outburst, something Wendy thought was totally uncalled for. Maybe Irene just needed to cool off. Yeah. Cool off. Just some downtime to relax. Wendy dutifully followed Irene through the halls. Wendy glanced behind to see no one behind. She didn't know what she was expecting. There'd been some teeny tiny part of her that had expected Seulgi to be there. Wendy didn't know why. Why would Seulgi have been there?

Wendy shrugged it off. Who needed Seulgi, anyway? Well, Wendy kind of did, but she also kind of didn't, because Seulgi was being a bit of an ass. But was she being an ass too? Wendy? Was she? No, it was justified. It was justified. _Seulgi_ was the one being unreasonable. Yes, yes. Yes.

Maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was seeing some of Seulgi's thought process? I feel like I haven't really been focusing on her, so I tried to reel that in a bit with this update. I randomly decided to write and managed to churn this out, so hopefully, it's okay. It's like 3 am, and I am just tired. Let me know what you guys think!


	11. The Night Before Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Homecoming is always prefaced by a Friday night football game, right? Well, everybody shows up to the game, including your favorite group of friends, and some tension builds.

"Homecoming!" Joy squealed and grabbed onto to Wendy's arm before shaking the poor girl senseless. Irene couldn't help but giggle as an aggravated Wendy's head bobbed violently forward before jerking back with the same momentum.

"Ow!" Wendy cried out in pain as her head connected with Yeri's.

"Watch it, shortie," Yeri said sullenly, rubbing the collision spot. "You too, string bean." 

Joy wrinkled her nose, denied Yeri a proper reply, and kept talking. "Homecoming is tonight! How come you guys don't look as excited?"

"I'm... excited." Wendy glanced sideways at Irene as she spoke. Irene opened her mouth to comment on the fact before deciding against it.

"Oh, you guys are no fun," Joy complained. "How come you didn't get a proper date, Wendy? None of Seulgi's fangirls take a liking to the sidekick?"

Wendy flinched every so slightly and replied coolly, arms crossed, "None of them were to  _my_  liking." Irene could practically feel the cold radiating off of Wendy's icy demeanor. Irene patted Wendy on the back, a gesture unnoticed by the table's other occupants. Wendy stiffened at Irene's touch before relaxing enough to let Irene know it was fine.

"Well, we can go together," Yeri cut in, raising an eyebrow at Joy. "Nothing wrong with going dateless."

"Didn't say anything was wrong," Joy said defensively.

"You didn't need to," muttered Yeri under her breath. She pulled out her phone and began to scroll slowly through whatever social media app had piqued her interest.

"We're all going to the Homecoming game, right?" Irene decided it was time to intervene. The increasingly dampened mood was not the move before the biggest football game of the season. She needed to go support Bo Gum, and she wanted her friends to go with her. Ideally, Seulgi would be part of said friends, but Irene's hopes were not high. Seulgi was probably going with YooA.

"Yup," chirped Joy, whose enthusiastic smile made Irene smile in return. "I wouldn't miss it for the world." Wendy and Yeri nodded in agreement, putting Irene at ease. She wouldn't have to go alone. Going alone was always awkward, especially when people came up to her and tried to make conversation. It's not that Irene didn't like talking, but sometimes it was just uncomfortable, Sometimes it just felt fake. But if they weren't doing anything too weird, Irene guessed it was out of her control, and she just had to deal. She was Class President, after all. Have to set a good example for the students.

"Sungjae coming with?" Yeri suddenly asked, turning to Joy who was already shaking her head.

"He's on the football team, remember?" Joy laughed and pushed a finger into Yeri's forehead. A small smile stole its way on Yeri's face as the maknae good-naturedly pushed Joy back. 

The previously uncomfortable milieu had disappeared. Irene breathed a sigh of relief. Things with Seulgi were already threatening to fall apart.

"Is Seulgi coming with us?" Yeri asked hopefully. Irene's heart sank as she took it upon herself to tell Yeri Seulgi would most likely be going with YooA. Yeri shrugged it off, but Irene knew the lack of Seulgi's presence had been particularly hard on Yeri now that Joy was constantly obsessing over Sungjae.

When the four friends decided to part ways until later, Irene hugged her bag close and leaned her forehead against the car steering wheel. She sighed and turned her key in the ignition. She needed to get ready for tonight, and she wanted to look her best. Just because. Her phone's music connected to the Bluetooth speakers of the car, and Irene leaned back into the seat. She felt too stressed for Homecoming, which was only one day away. One day. Her dress had been bought, and plans had been made. Seulgi, of course, was going with YooA, freaking YooA, but Irene hoped to still see Seulgi there. Maybe she'd steal a dance away from dang YooA and show her what it's felt like to watch from the sidelines. Yes. Irene would look over Seulgi's shoulder -- Irene knew she was shorter than Seulgi, but the situation was theoretical, so -- then she'd make YooA watch as she stood on her tiptoes and gave Seulgi a --

Irene's face warmed as she realized where the train of thought had been going. While that seemed like the ultimate "fuck you" to YooA, a great idea in Irene's mind besides the whole having-to-pretty-much-violate-Seulgi part, Irene knew she would never go through with such a plan. Doing something like that would undoubtedly drive Seulgi away forever, and further into the arms of her super round-faced girlfriend, who Irene reluctantly admitted was pretty cute. Seulgi was cuter, but, whatever. YooA was cute.

 

"Are you cold?" Seulgi asked worriedly, wrapping her letterman jacket around YooA, who giggled at Seulgi's unwarranted concern.

"It's 70 degrees out, Seul," YooA reminded lightly. "But I'll still wear this because it's yours, and I want everyone," YooA kissed Seulgi's cheek, " _everyone_ , to know I'm yours."

Seulgi grinned from ear-to-ear as she took hold of YooA's hand and led her into the stadium. The two sat down in the bleachers among the sea of eager fans that wore the school's maroon and gold colors. Seulgi spotted the knight mascot thrusting a sword that lacked structural integrity, the blade flopping around like a limp piece of lettuce. The knight threw his costumed arms up and jumped, calling the crowd to join him. Cheerleaders swarmed around the knight and flipped about the field, setting the stage for the marching band.

The marching band came out trumpets first. The sound of the brass instruments carried, and before long, saxophones began their part. The band marched about in mesmerizing formations. Seulgi was always impressed by how the band geeks managed to march  _and_  play an instrument at the same time. One wrong move and the audience would notice. 

Once the band finished their routine, ending with a formation in the shape of a honeycomb, and a bee flying toward it, the drum line began pounding away. The football team, led by that Bo Gum, yelled furiously as they bumped chests before slapping each other on the backs and smacking helmets. Seulgi smiled at the sight. To be honest, they looked kind of stupid prancing about, but it was all in good spirit. Seulgi had her fingers crossed that the school would win for a glorious segue into the Homecoming dance the following night.

"They're starting," whispered YooA excitedly. She clutched onto Seulgi's arm, eyes attentively watching as Oh Sehun sprinted down the field. Bo Gum had just snapped him the ball, and two opposing players crashed into each other after failing to anticipate Sehun's brilliant spin move. "Wow! He's so good."

"He really is. I hope we win."

"I think we will." YooA's beaming expression made Seulgi press a chaste kiss to her lips, causing a light blush to spread across YooA's cheeks. "You-!"

"Touchdown," Seulgi interrupted, smiling at YooA. "You're so cute. I couldn't help myself." Seulgi cupped YooA's face in her hands. "I mean, just look at your little face!"

"My face? Just look at yours! Your baby cheeks are what I live for." To prove her point, YooA pinched Seulgi's cheek, hard, and smiled in satisfaction when a taken aback Seulgi suddenly raised a hand to the reddening area. 

"Ow," Seulgi complained, rubbing her face. "That hurt."

"Oh, baby," YooA cooed and bopped Seulgi's nose, causing Seulgi to bob back and then forth like one of those weird inflatables that sit outside car dealerships. The ones with the arms that fly everywhere and have spiky hair. Speaking of spiky hair, a few of Seulgi's hair stood up on end. YooA flattened some against Seulgi's scalp, but several still stubbornly went against the grain. Seulgi rubbed her cheek again, still red from YooA's strong pinching.

"Kiss it better?" Seulgi asked innocently. Before she even finished the question, a wet mark appeared on her face and felt cool against the night air. "You're the best."

"No, you are."

"Looks like our school is." A wave of cheering overtook the crowd as Chanyeol slammed a member of the opposite team into the ground with a solid shoulder to the chest. "I have a good feeling about the game."

YooA snuggled against Seulgi's body, her head resting in the crook of Seulgi's neck. "Me too."

 

Irene clutched Wendy's arm as Bo Gum neared the end zone. "Come on, come on, come on," Irene said under her breath, arms poised to be thrown up in celebration of yet another six points. 

"Oh, man." Wendy creased her brow and looked at the scoreboard. "Well, next one."

"You said that last possession."

"Shut up, Squirtle."

" _You_ shut up, shortie!"

"Hey!" Irene shoved the bickering two apart. "Both of you, go sit down."

Yeri unwillingly backed off and crossed her arms. Wendy gave Yeri an uneasy sideways glance before taking a seat. Irene slinked an arm back through Wendy's and watched the game that had managed to keep Joy's full attention. Joy's eyes were glued to probably Sungjae, and she was shouting continuously with no end in sight. "Yes! Go, Knights! Sock it to 'em!" Joy punched the air repeatedly as Sungjae dashed down the field. "Yook Sungjae! That's my man!  _Mine_! You get that touchdown!"

"I've never seen her so enthusiastic about football," Irene commented. She watched as Joy leaped up and screamed some more support for the Knights.

"Do you think she knows that Sungjae's trying to tackle the other team? Who happens to have the ball?" Yeri looked doubtful, already having an answer to her question in mind, as Joy kept yelling. Irene's ears were shattered with another round of screams for Sungjae, this time about his amazing tackle.

"Or she's just shouting automatically and tuning in whenever her radio head finds the right frequency," Wendy joked with a grin as Irene leaned into Wendy's body. It was a little cold outside.

Yeri rolled her eyes at the jest but Irene could see her stifling a giggle. When Jackson smashed down one of the team's opponents with a hard tackle to the waist, sending the two rolling together another five yards, Irene unwrapped Wendy's arm from around her shoulders and excused herself to go buy a pretzel.

"You sure you don't want me to go with you?"

"It's fine, Wendy. You go ahead and watch the game."

By the concessions stand, where a long line wound around itself, Irene made the decision to brave the line. She hugged herself with a shiver, involuntarily chattering her teeth. Suddenly, someone bumped into her back and Irene was really going to go off on the poor target of her anger when she realized who it was. "Oh, um, hi, Seul."

"Ah, hey, Irene," Seulgi fumbled with her words. "So what are you doing here?"

"Just buying some food," Irene answered awkwardly, pointing up at the concessions stand menu. "You know, the usual."

"Pretzel?"

"What?"

"Are you buying a pretzel?"

"Yeah, actually."

Seulgi laughed at Irene's dumbfounded expression. "You always buy a pretzel, remember?"

"Oh, right" came Irene's embarrassed reply. She and Seulgi had always come to football games together. Of course, Seulgi knew what she ordered. It was a tradition to order a pretzel, piping hot. Soft pretzels were, well, soft, and Irene could really use something hot at the moment.

"Are you cold?" Seulgi asked. The concern in her eyes made Irene miss hanging out with Seulgi. She'd just seen her the other day at lunch, one of the few days where YooA sat with her friends and Seulgi was able to rightfully sit with hers. "Hyun? You're shivering."

Irene's right eyebrow quirked up at the nickname. "Ah... It's a little bit chilly."

"I'd give you my jacket, but I ga-- I don't have one," Seulgi said, rubbing the nape of her neck apologetically. Irene knew that Seulgi's prized letterman jacket was probably blanketed over YooA, but no matter.

"It's fine." Irene shifted on her feet, hesitant to ask Seulgi but wanting to so bad. "So-?"

"Oh, um, I can hug you? O-only if you want me to..."

Seulgi's expression was too cute, and Irene couldn't help but giggle. That wasn't what Irene was about to ask, but the offer still stood, and Irene was cold. She stepped towards Seulgi and pulled her arms towards her chest. Seulgi's arms wrapped around her waist and Irene could already feel the warmth.

"Better?" Seulgi moved back a little bit to see if Irene was comfortable before receiving confirmation through Irene's hands quickly yanking Seulgi back by the shirt.

Irene hummed her content and closed her eyes, becoming suddenly aware of her quickening heartbeat thundering in her ears. Irene didn't get why it was beating so fast. She chalked it up to the strange distance that had come between her and Seulgi as of late. It'd been a while since the two had been so close. Against the brisk chill, Seulgi was so warm, and her arms were so strong. Seulgi's entire body was fit, and many people knew it. Irene often saw fangirls ogling Seulgi's abs after catching a quick glance here and there once Seulgi's shirt rode up. The more courageous fangirls, courageous no more now that Seulgi had a girlfriend, used to try and sweet talk Seulgi while casually patting or even squeezing her bicep. Those were the days.

"What would you like?" Irene's eyes shot open as the man at the stand gave a friendly smile, waiting for her response.

"A soft pretzel," Seulgi answered for her. 

"Are you together?"

"N-no," Irene said quickly. Seulgi gave her a weird look.

"Paying separately." Seulgi looked over the menu as Irene paid for her pretzel before telling the man, "Can I get a coke and some popcorn, please?"

Irene raised a hand to her cheek to feel her face warming up in shame. She'd jumped to conclusions, and she'd fallen very, very short. Seulgi thanked the man and held the coke and popcorn in her hands. "See you later, then?"

"Oh, yeah, definitely," Irene replied, absentmindedly picking some salt from her pretzel. As Seulgi began walking away, Irene impulsively called after her to wait.

"Did you need something? Irene?"

"I... I was just wondering if you wanted to go with me to Homecoming tomorrow night."

"Aren't you going with Bo Gum?"

"I meant go with me and our friends. In our group. You  _and_ YooA," Irene corrected herself. "Tomorrow. Only if you want to."

Seulgi thought for a moment before breaking out into a teddy bear grin and answering, "I'd love to. I'll check with YooA to make sure, but yeah."

"Great! See you tomorrow?" Irene returned the smile.

"Tomorrow," Seulgi nodded before heading off back to YooA.

Irene let out the breath she'd been holding in. I'd _love to, not_ we'd _love to_ , thought Irene.  _Interesting_. Irene thought about the word choice all the way back up to her seat in the bleachers. She crossed the paths of some greasy boys who waggled their eyebrows and only been acknowledged with an eye-roll. 

"What took you so long? You missed Bo Gum's touchdown! He did this incredible flip over the other team. Oh my god. It was insane." Wendy poked Irene in the shoulder. "Hello?"

"Line was line, I mean, long," Irene stumbled over her words. "Sorry."

"What are you apologizing for? No sorry here," Wendy said back. "Still cold?"

"Not anymore. I warmed up."

"That's good." Wendy gave Irene's arm a squeeze before bringing a hand up to amplify her voice and shout, "Nice one, Jackson!"

Irene took her seat and watched intently as the other team fumbled. She tried to get into the game, but her brain refused. Her mind was elsewhere.

 

"I don't think that's a good idea, Seul."

"Why not?" Seulgi frowned as she let go of YooA's dainty hands. "Don't you want to know my friends?"

"Of course, baby," YooA said, grabbing for the hands that had just slipped from hers. "But..."

"But what?"

"It's Irene," confessed YooA. "Bae Irene."

"Yeah," Seulgi said slowly, not understanding YooA's point. "Bae Irene is one of my friends."

YooA coughed in disbelief. "Yes, she is, Seul, and she hates me."

" _Hate_  is a strong word..."

"Hate," YooA said flatly. "She hates me."

"Babe-"

"Seulgi, you can't tell me I'm wrong. She stares daggers at me and looks like she wants to tear me apart limb from limb every time I get within even a foot of you, I think if she could, she'd make me disappear."

"Don't be silly, YooA." Seulgi cupped the shorter girl's face and continued, "Irene likes you. She just doesn't know you yet."

YooA sighed. "Look, Seul, I'll be honest. I really don't think she likes me, and that makes me not like her. But I don't know her, so I'll give her a chance if she'll give me one. I like you, A lot. I want to know your friends and I want you to know mine. The only difference is that you get along with mine and mine get along with you. Your other friends are okay with me, I guess, but Irene... Well, Irene is a whole other story."

"Please, baby," Seulgi pleaded, hands clasped together, eyes silently asking YooA to forgive her for being selfish when asking this next question. "Please just give her a chance?"

YooA touched Seulgi's cheek and sighed. "I will, Seul, but will she give me one?"

Seulgi, happy with YooA conceding, hugged the shorter girl around the waist and pecked her on the lips. "You're the best."

"I know," YooA smiled uneasily. She twirled a piece of hair around her pointer finger.   _She doesn't like me, Seul. Can't you see that? She doesn't like me..._

"Oh, and, I know she will," Seulgi answered YooA's question. "She's Irene, and you're YooA. She'll love you."

 _She loves you. Only you._ YooA pursed her lips and didn't resist as Seulgi took hold of her hand. It was chilly out, anyway, and YooA wanted them to hurry up and announce Homecoming Court, but she knew that wouldn't come until Homecoming night. Seul was bound to win a spot. Whether Seulgi would win Queen, though, YooA didn't know. There was some competition for the spot. Irene was Class President, and she was dating Bo Gum, who was definitely going to win Homecoming King. Irene was very kind and generous, and she was friendly with everyone.

Except YooA, apparently. 

And, as much as it pained YooA to admit, Irene was very, very pretty. Like, an ungodly amount of pretty. Seulgi called her a goddess. YooA wasn't a huge fan of that, but Seulgi was right. Irene was a damn goddess. YooA wasn't even entirely sure that Irene  _hadn't_  descended from the sky to bless their student body with a touch of heaven. She was perfect. Seulgi was right. Perfect.

Though Irene made the yes, perfect, contender, Seulgi wasn't out of the running. Not by a long shot. Resident girl crush with her own fanbase, Kang Seulgi was a force to be reckoned with. YooA still caught girls eyeing Seulgi's fit figure when Seulgi cruised through the halls. Seulgi still got the occasional confession letter falling out of her locker, and she still got little gifts; Usually, from innocent underclassmen, who posed, YooA hoped, absolutely no threat. Seulgi was very popular and very hot. There was no doubt in YooA's mind that Seulgi would have her fair share of votes. 

"And that's it, folks! Your very own XX Knights have won the game, with a beautiful touchdown scored by Park Bo Gum!" The thunderous sound of shoes clanging against the metal bleachers boosted the raucous cheering and applause that echoed throughout the stadium. "Remember to buy your tickets and get dressed up for your Homecoming Dance, tomorrow night! Be there, or be square!"

"You know, YooA," Seulgi said in a serious tone, "if you are square,  _you aren't around_."

"Oh-!" YooA laughed and hit Seulgi's shoulder playfully. Seulgi's wide grin warmed YooA up right then and there, but it didn't make the exhausting ache in her heart disappear. YooA was worried. Homecoming was tomorrow. 

And that meant Irene.


	12. Traitor of a Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Homecoming. What could go wrong?
> 
> A lot of things, actually. For one, Irene's heart. She's not supposed to feel like this.

Homecoming. The grand event of the fall season; a dance not to be missed.

Homecoming was supposed to be an amazing night with amazing people. There was a Homecoming Court filled with the popular kids, a traditional King and Queen dance followed by dances between the rest of the Court, and to top it off, Homecoming was spent with a date. A date.

Seulgi glanced sideways at her date: YooA. As Seulgi slipped the corsage over her hand, YooA giggled, before sliding one onto Seulgi's wrist as well. Seulgi felt her chest swell with pride at the gesture, seeing the yellow roses stand out bright against the skin of her wrist. No messy boutonniere business for them. Irene, however, concentrated carefully on the pin that she pierced through Bo Gum's lapel, careful to avoid drawing blood. Once the flowery ornament clung firmly to his chest, Irene stood back to admire her handiwork.

"So when will the blood come out?"

"Hey!" Irene shoved Bo Gum, making him feign injury, before laughing at his jest. "I did a pretty good job, you know."

"Better than Krystal." Kai pointed at the lopsided rose that was oriented horizontally. Bo Gum had obviously needed a guy friend, so a last-minute group had been formed. "Can you believe this?"

"Well, that's on  _you_  for wanting to do flowers," defended Krystal haughtily. "I'll be sure to poke you next time."

"Bold of you to assume there'd be a 'next time.'"

"You look amazing," whispered YooA. She smiled cutely at her girlfriend, who squeezed an arm around YooA's waist.

"And you, look beautiful," Seulgi said sincerely. She applauded herself for choice of corsage. Sapphire-colored Delphinium flowers combined with white Calla Lilies sat tied in a bundle of ribbons, accenting the brilliant blue of YooA's dress, which Seulgi found herself being drawn to unintentionally. The dress was absolutely stunning.  _YooA_  was absolutely stunning. "This really was a nice surprise."

"So now you know why I wanted to keep it a secret," YooA said with a suggestive eyebrow raised. "A surprise just for you."

"I love it."

Seulgi pressed a kiss to YooA's forehead before pulling them both towards the rest of the group for an obligatory pre-Homecoming photo. YooA, Yeri, Wendy and Irene bent down slightly in the front while the rest of them stood in the back, holding each other around the shoulders and waists to bridge any awkward gaps before the entire group unanimously chorused, "Cheese kimbap!"

 

Seulgi marveled at the setup before her. Flowery vines and balloons lined the entrance and after passing through, Seulgi was met with fairy lights galore, twinkling and shining to light up the atmosphere with a sense of wonder. She was deep in thought, entranced by the small (fake) candles that sat atop each table when something bounced lightly off her head, making her react instinctively with a shout and turn of the head.

"Sorry," YooA giggled, flattening Seulgi's staticky hair, "not sorry." 

Seulgi threw the offending object back at YooA, making the girl dodge quickly before grinning at Seulgi and throwing arms around her waist. Seulgi felt pacified after the kiss, fulfilling the exact intent of YooA. Seulgi looked away from YooA only to see Yeri with a mischevious smile chasing after a mildly terrified Wendy with that same object in hand.

"Come on, just one-"

"Get away from me, Satan!"

"She's very scary," Krystal murmured from beside Seulgi. Seulgi whipped her head to look at Krystal, taken aback by her sudden appearance.

"She really is," Seulgi said back. She looked at Wendy who had taken refuge behind Joy, interrupting her date with Sungjae.

"Yah, Seungwan! Stop interrupting!"

"SOS!"

"You, Squirtle, go away!"

"Shut up, Park Sooyoung!"

Sungjae stood to the side, and he laughed at the sight before him, holding his stomach. He laughed so hard that he nearly fell to the ground. Seulgi couldn't help but laugh as well at the bizarre sight. Joy stood tall, a finger pointing off into the distance, yelling at Yeri to leave while Wendy clung to Joy's waist looking like a deer in headlights. All this for a balloon.

 

"Care to dance?" Bo Gum's voice interrupted Irene's train of thought, and she gave with a start.

"Oh, Bo Gum! Yeah, of course." Irene smiled, making him feel warm inside as the object of her affections, and he took her hand, leading her towards the dancefloor. But as he held her waist, taking his rightful place as boyfriend and Homecoming date, he couldn't help but think twice about how she stared at her best friend.

_She must really miss her._

Yes, Bo Gum. She really did.

 

Seulgi danced with Wendy and Yeri, laughing and stepping to the beat. Seulgi body-rolled not once, but twice, as Red Velvet's  _Bad Boy_  blared over the speakers, causing Wendy to whistle appreciatively.

"Damn, Seul! You better stop before the girls over there try more than just harmless staring." Wendy jerked a thumb in the direction of the small huddle of fangirls that had accumulated. If this was an anime, Wendy had no doubt that fifteen pairs of heart eyes would threaten to explode. Seulgi immediately stopped and wiped her face with the back of her hand, trying to wipe her blush away with it as she waved to her fans. Fifteen hands slowly waved back.

"Let's... just keep dancing, guys," Seulgi said, getting back into her groove. She still wasn't used to the attention that she got, no matter how much of it she got. 

It wasn't long before Seulgi felt fingers tap her shoulder. She turned around to come face-to-face with a girl she didn't recognize.

"Kang Seulgi?" The girl asked in a soft voice.

"Uh..."

"Yes, this is Kang Seulgi." Wendy walked up beside Seulgi, ready to fight whoever this girl was before her-

"Who are you?" The girl asked kindly, flashing a dazzling smile Wendy's way.

"Uh..."

"You horny- God, somebody save me," Yeri muttered, shooting off a slew of profanities under the breath before yanking Wendy out of the way. "Who are you supposed to be?"

"Eunji," she answered. "Jung Eunji."

"What do you want?" Yeri didn't trust this girl one bit. "What do you want with Seulgi?"

Eunji looked surprised at Yeri's harshness. "A girl over there just wanted me to ask if Kang Seulgi would dance with her."

"And why would Seulgi want to do that?" Yeri stepped closer to this Eunji.

"Well..."

"Seulgi has a girlfriend, and she has _me_ , so you can shove-"

"Yeri," Seulgi whispered, teeth clenched together, grabbing Yeri's wrist before the younger could throw hands. "Please."

"About time you snapped out of it, you dumb bear." Yeri gave Eunji a pointed look before saying to Seulgi, "Some girl apparently asked her to ask you to dance."

"Dance with her?"

"No, not her," Yeri said exasperatedly. Did she need to spell it out for Seulgi? "Dance with the girl that asked her to ask you."

"Oh, um, right," Seulgi said quickly, not actually really understanding whatever tongue Yeri just spoke in.

"Her name is Chungha," Eunji offered. She just stood awkwardly next to Yeri and Seulgi and only spoke up because she saw Wendy start to get closer, her mouth half-opened to speak.

"Who is this 'Chungha'? _Where_ is this 'Chungha'? She too afraid to come ask Seulgi herself?" barked Yeri. She was going to kill whoever was interrupting what little precious time she got to spend with her Seulgi unnie. These days, it was either YooA this, YooA that, or whoever. There was no time for Yeri anymore.

Eunji shrugged and pointed a finger at some vixen who had the audacity to wink and wave with her fingers. Yeri's jaw dropped to the floor. What the hell?

"Unnie, you can't possibly be okay with this."

"Yeri, calm down," said Seulgi, placing her hands on Yeri's shoulders to prevent the girl from jumping any higher. "It's just one dance."

"Is  _YooA_  okay with this? Hmm?"

"She doesn't mind it. She trusts me."

"But-" Yeri's bottom lip jutted out in a pout, and she sighed, giving in to Seulgi's puppy dog eyes. "Fine, unnie. As long as you're sure. Yo, Wannie, close your mouth." As Seulgi walked away with Eunji, Yeri had to physically close Wendy's mouth herself as the girl looked starstruck off at Eunji.

"She's the one, Yeri."

"What?"

"Her. Eunji. Yes."

"Okay, unnie. I think you need to sit down." Yeri led Wendy away towards some chairs and brought her a cup of punch. Wendy had about as much functionally as a rock, and Yeri stared at her catatonic unnie, shaking her head.

This was going to be a long night.

 

Irene was confused when she came upon a Wendy with her face hidden in her hands. Yeri slapped her upside the head, and Irene sprung into action.

"Yah! What are you doing?"

"Horny unnie," Yeri shot Wendy a death glare, "can't keep it in her pants for Eunji, and now Seulgi is dancing with... What's her name? Chungha."

Irene frowned. How did any of what Yeri was saying correlate? "So you're saying that because Wendy can't keep it in her pants, Seulgi is dancing with another girl."

"Yes!" Yeri shouted. The Irene she knew wasn't dumb, so why was she taking forever to understand?

"So pretty..."

" _Now_  you can talk?!" Yeri was about to smack Wendy again.

"Is... Is Seulgi cheating on YooA?"

"Well, no, but she might as well be. I don't know why YooA tolerated this kind of thing. Seulgi says it's because YooA  _trusts_  her but I say bullshit, okay? I say bullshit!"

"Yeri, chill out."

Yeri gulped as Irene eyes seared a hole straight through her brain. She forgot how scary unnie could be at times. "Okay, okay. Fine."

"Ladies and gents, it's time to announce XX High's very own, annual _Homecoming Court_ _!"_

Irene glanced up at the nearest speaker and pulled Wendy to her feet. "Come on, Seungwan. They're announcing the Court."

"We already know you're winning Queen, Irene-"

"Did I not tell you to  _chill_   _out_?"

"Ow, unnie!"

 

"They're announcing," Seulgi said, pulling away from the girl. "Uh, see you later?"

"Thanks for the dance, Seulgi." Chungha bowed slightly to Seulgi's surprise.

"Oh, um, you don't have to do that-"

"See you later." Chungha blew a kiss and stalked away, leaving Seulgi gaping like a fish. That girl had actually  _bowed_. Oh, god,

"Babe?" YooA slipped an arm through Seulgi's territorially. "Babe."

"Yeah?"

"They're announcing, so let's go," YooA urged a little impatiently, jostling Seulgi with her shoulder.

"Right, right. Let's."

 

Irene instinctively reached out and felt her hand come in contact with Bo Gum's arm. He turned, surprised by Irene's sudden skinship, before smiling and giving her hand a tight squeeze. "You okay?"

"Huh?" Irene blinked before returning his gentle gaze. It was calming. He always had that effect on her. Her rock and stability. "I'm fine."

"Alright," said Bo Gum, holding onto Irene's hand. After a moment's silence, he opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a voice traveling through the speakers.

"Okay, everyone! The votes are in, and your Homecoming Court has been decided. Are you all ready to find out this year's royalty?!"

The crowd cheered, and Bo Gum gave a pump of the fist and a cheesy smile that made Irene giggle. He leaned over and said only for her to hear, "No matter how the votes go, even if you're not voted Queen, you'll always be  _my_  queen."

"Oh, stop," laughed Irene. He was such a cheeseball.

"But we both know that you'll get the title." He pressed a kiss to Irene's temple. "After all, who wouldn't vote you Queen?"

"The people who voted for Seulgi, maybe," Irene suggested, feeling something pang in her suddenly hollow chest. 

Bo Gum cleared his throat when he noticed Irene's uneasy expression. He chalked it up to nerves and an unreasonably solid mindset that the title of Homecoming Queen belonged to someone who wasn't his amazing girlfriend. "Don't worry, Irene. You'll win. You're beautiful, and everyone knows it."

"Yeah..."

"First, we will be announcing this year's Homecoming  _King_!" The announcer's voice echoed, bouncing off the walls and reverberating through the rowdy crowd. "This year, the title of Homecoming King goes to..."

"You'll win Queen, I promise," whispered Bo Gum, still under the impression that was what Irene was thinking about.

_"Park Bo Gum!"_

"Looks like that's my cue," Bo Gum said with a smile, slipping his hand from Irene's. Irene felt the warmth leave her hand and she closed her eyes for a brief second, willing the feeling to come back. It had felt so nice.

"Thank you all for your votes! I'm excited to find out who you all have voted to be my Queen." Bo Gum winked at Irene, who couldn't help but giggle. 

"We are, too, Bo Gum! And now, to find out your Homecoming Queen... Drumroll, please, everyone... This year's Homecoming Queen, a young lady entirely deserving of this title, is the one and only, your Class President, _Bae Irene_!"

The thunderous applause welcomed Irene as she walked up onto the stage, joining her boyfriend whose hand returned to its rightful place within hers. 

"Told you," Bo Gum said, slipping an arm around her waist. Irene smiled and waved to the crowd.

"Park Bo Gum and Bae Irene, your Homecoming King and Queen, everyone!" Another round of applause sounded throughout the room but quickly quieted down in anticipation of the rest of the Court. "Besides the King and Queen, the Court also has its Royalty! After all, what Court would be complete without the rest of its nobility? The male vote for Royalty goes to... Yes, goes to a _Jackson from the football team_!" Jackson pumped his fists exaggeratedly before cruising up to the stage and grabbing the mic.

"Suck on this, Sehun," shouted Jackson, laughing with glee. "You, too, Chanyeol. Bet both of you thought you'd win. Sike!"

Seulgi held back a laugh when Jackson stuck his tongue out. He was a funny guy.

"The female vote for Royalty, a close contender for Queen, actually... is _Kang Seulgi_!"

Seulgi made her way onto the stage and bowed slightly as a sash for Royalty was placed over the shoulder, matching the one Jackson wore. Irene, beautiful Irene, wore a tiara and sash for a Queen, while Bo Gum wore an ornate crown and sash for a King. The students in the audience yelled and cheered as the announcer took hold of the microphone once again, still not quite done announcing.

"And of course, we can't forget the traditional Homecoming dances! Bo Gum and Irene, King and Queen, please make your way to the floor for your first dance."

"My Queen," Bo Gum said, bowing dramatically.

"My King," Irene joked back, bent down in a curtsy.

The announcer called for Jackson and Seulgi to join, as the Royalty of the Court, and Irene couldn't help but glance over Bo Gum's shoulder and get a full-on image of Seulgi's wonderful smile smiling up at Jackson. Irene pursed her lips, supposing that Seulgi and Jackson would make a great couple except-

Irene knitted her eyebrows.  _Except what, Irene? She's gay, for crying out loud. What are you thinking about?_

"We're the better couple," Bo Gum reassured Irene. "Don't worry."

That's definitely not the thought that had been crossing Irene's mind, but okay, Bo Gum.

"Yeah, no, I know. They're not a real couple, anyway."

"They could be."

"Hello, Bo Gum? Seulgi?"

"What about her?" Bo Gum frowned slightly. "I think he'd like her." Bo Gum lowered his voice more. "To be honest, I think he kind of does."

"What about her? She's a lesbian _,_ Bo Gum.  _That_ 's what's about her. Jackson's chances are none. Plus," Irene added with a scoff, "Seulgi could do better."

Bo Gum raised an eyebrow and smiled sheepishly. If it weren't for the hundreds of eyes that were trained on their every move, he probably would've stopped the dance and reached a hand up to scratch the back of his neck. "Right, sorry. I forgot. I still think Jackson likes her though."

"Silly."

"And now for the Court to switch partners!"

"Don't have to much fun with Jackson," Bo Gum jokingly warned, taking hold of Seulgi, who smiled warmly at Irene with an apologetic shrug as if to say, _Sorry for stealing your boyfriend!_

Irene snorted at the thought. As if Seulgi would ever do something like that.

While dancing with Jackson, Irene once again found herself drawn to looking at the other couple. She watched Seulgi dance with Bo Gum and felt uneasy, bile rising to the back of her throat. She didn't understand. She wasn't worried about Seulgi stealing her boyfriend at all, so why was she jealous? Seulgi wasn't a threat. Not by a long shot. 

And Jackson wasn't that great. No, he was not. There was no way that Seulgi, if she were attracted to guys, of course, would ever go out with Jackson.

Irene was so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn't even noticed the song was over until Jackson poked her in the side, bringing her back to reality. She needed to get out. It was all too much. She thanked Jackson and quickly made her exit, pushing through the doors and making her way out into the hallway, suddenly dizzy. Her heart was beating a mile a minute, and she desperately willed her lungs to just  _breathe_. She sank down to the floor, not trusting herself to make it any further without possibly fainting. What was wrong with her? Why was she panicking now, of all times?

"Irene?" A soft voice called to Irene, calming her the way that her boyfriend always does. Dear Bo Gum. That's one of the reasons why she liked him so. 

"Yeah, I'm okay, now that you're here," Irene said. Of course, Bo Gum would come to her. So loving.

"Uh, okay. Did it happen again?"

"Ye-" Irene's eyes opened only to be met by a pair of sharp monolids. "Seulgi!"

"That is my name, yes," Seulgi said, looking amused. She knelt beside Irene and held her hand. "Now, do you feel better now?"

"Yeah..."

"Do you need some air?"

"That'd be great."

The two breathed in the cool autumn air, standing in silence. Finally, Seulgi spoke.

"Did something trigger it?"

"I don't know," admitted Irene. 

"What happened before it?"

"I was dancing with Jackson, and I was watching you..."

"Watching me?" Seulgi wondered out loud, tilting her head to the side in confusion.

"With Bo Gum," Irene quickly clarified. "I was watching you dance with Bo Gum."

"And?"

"That. And that."

"Do,,, you think that could've triggered it?"

"I don't know why it would," Irene said quietly. "I... I thought that, I don't know, I was maybe jealous of you."

"Jealous of  _me_?" Seulgi asked incredulously.

"But I quickly shot that down," Irene said. "There's no way I'd be jealous of you with Bo Gum. I know you wouldn't do anything."

"You're right about that."

"But I don't know, Seulgi... I still think it was jealousy," Irene confessed, mind clouded and heart heavy. She still felt something in the pit of her stomach, insidious worry worming its way through her body for no reason that she could think of. Besides jealousy. It was the only lead. Irene cursed her body for reacting so strangely.

"But if you were jealous, then what would you be jealous of?" Seulgi was confused, and Irene was too. Seulgi was right. What would Irene be jealous of?

"I don't know, Seulgi."

"There's nothing for you to be jealous of-"

"I said, I don't know."

"And I mean, it's not like you'd be jealous of Bo Gum-"

"I  _said_ , I don't know!" Irene immediately regretted raising her voice at seeing Seulgi flinch. "Seulgi, I... I'm sorry, I just... I feel so off." Irene finished her lame excuse, trying to erase the guilt from her mind.

Seulgi just smiled and squeezed Irene's hand. "It's okay."

Seulgi was so selfless and caring. Irene didn't know what she did in a previous life to deserve her, but she sure as hell was sure that she needed to hold on. For dear life, if she had to. Seulgi was too good.

Even though she decided to date damn YooA.

"Wait, did you say jealous of Bo Gum?"

"Yeah? I said that it's not like you're jealous of him."

"Why would I be jealous of him?"

"And people think  _I'm_  dense," Seulgi joked awkwardly, finding it strange to have to explain. "I was kidding about being jealous of him. I was kidding that maybe you'd be jealous of him because he was dancing with me."

"Oh. Right."

"Yeah."

Seulgi tapped her fingers together, unsure of how to clear the now awkward air. Meanwhile, Irene was deep in thought.

_Jealous of... Bo Gum? Could it be?_

But she was  _dating_  Bo Gum! She loved him. He was so kind and caring and always made her smile. He was so handsome, and he was always there for her. He was the perfect boyfriend, someone who comforted her and supported her. Even though sometimes, he just didn't get it. Even though sometimes, he didn't say the right things or know what to do. He still tried, though! He tried so hard and invested so much effort in Irene. She was thankful for that. But still, she supposed, sometimes he really didn't know what to say, not like Seulgi did. She almost always said exactly the right things, and she was someone that Irene could count on, usually. 

But now she was always with YooA. Freaking YooA. Speaking of YooA, how come Seulgi wasn't with her? Actually, Irene didn't want to think about that. It was a  _good_ thing that Seulgi was with her instead of YooA. YooA was everywhere, and finally, Irene could spend some time with her best friend. She had missed her. 

When Irene's arms wrapped around her waist, Seulgi wordlessly hugged her in return, hoping actions spoke louder than the words she couldn't find. She didn't know what to say anymore. All she knew was that she wanted that worrisome frown to disappear from Irene's face.

Irene buried her face in the crook of Seulgi's neck and sighed. Seulgi smelled good.

Oh my god. What?

Irene suddenly felt sick again. She pushed Seulgi away and tried to make her way back into the building, ignoring Seulgi's calls.

"Irene, wait!"

"Hey!"

Hands gripped her wrist, and Irene felt herself being forced to stop and turn around. 

"What's wrong now, Hyun?" 

A fierce stare pierced through Irene, and she found herself lost for words. As she searched for something to say, she became aware of her quickening heartbeat, of her proximity to Seulgi, and she knew she couldn't push the thought away anymore. And that thought made her want to cry. This thought that had been hiding in the back of her mind, a thought she had pleaded with to stay hidden, to disappear... It's time to shine had come. She wished the darkness would swallow it.

"Why are you crying? Hyun?"

Irene was too busy wiping her face to reply, the tears falling harder with Seulgi's every call.

"Hyun, please. Talk to me."

_Hyun, Hyun._

"Hyunnie?" Seulgi tried hopefully,

 _Do you have nicknames like that for YooA, too?_ Irene thought bitterly. Was this life's idea of a cruel joke? To plant such a thought in her head?

"I'm fine." Irene brushed the last of the tears away, forcing them to disappear. She exhaled hard. "Really."

"You don't seem fine."

"You always did know how to read me, huh?"

"The tears and sniffling aren't that hard to understand. Can't you tell me what's wrong? You know I'm here for you." 

"It's hard to explain."  _This can't be happening. Please. I can't do this._

"Try me." Seulgi's determined expression made Irene almost laugh out loud.

How could she possibly hope to explain to Seulgi that earlier she was right? That she was jealous? That she wasn't dense, but in useless denial? How could she possibly explain the hollowness that was filling her chest? Or the feeling that pricked at her skin and made her hands go numb? How could she explain the girlfriend? The so-called hatred, so wrongfully aimed? It disguised something far more atrocious, terribly unspeakable, and what could Irene do? What could she say? How could she explain it?

There was only one answer. She couldn't.

So she didn't, and her thoughts drifted away as fast as they came, floating with the breeze that sent chills down her spine. But nothing could make her feel colder than she already did.

 

Funny how the world works like that sometimes. Hilarious.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking so long! I had so many ideas for this chapter with no idea how to implement them, and I'm terribly indecisive. I couldn't choose how to write this out. It ended up being actually pretty angsty, so I hope you are all okay with this mess of a chapter. I may come back to edit this, but we all know the chances are low. But they are there. Somewhere. 
> 
> Thank you all for being so patient and waiting an entire month. Thank you for the comments and upvotes. Lastly, thank you for managing to make it through this awfully written chapter.
> 
> Until next time!


	13. What You Do to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Homecoming incident, things are... kind of back to normal. Seulgi's not really sure what happened, and Irene sure as hell hasn't told her, either. They both have skirted around the topic, but everything has been mostly okay. Irene and Seulgi are hanging out with their friends when they share a nice moment together in the bathroom after Irene needs a breather. From Seulgi. Being too hot. The moment is heartwarming and just one step forward towards piecing their lives back together. Or is it?

Seulgi was confused. Very confused.

From Irene's outburst at Homecoming to Seulgi's barely strong friendships, she was just... confused. Was she doing anything right?

Seulgi shifted uncomfortably in her seat, YooA patting her arm to settle her down before giving her cheek a kiss. Irene noticed, and Seulgi thought she saw something change, but it happened too quick to be sure. Before Seulgi knew it, Irene was smiling again, laughing at something Wendy said. When Seulgi thought about it, Wendy and Irene were getting awfully close. A good thing, she supposed, but it felt like she hadn't spent time with them in a while. She missed hanging out with her friends. Just them. Seulgi felt bad for having such thoughts, especially when YooA had been nothing but kind. She loved YooA and wanted her girlfriend to know how amazing her friends were but at the same time, you can't talk about the same things with your girlfriend that you would with your friends. Like, how was Seulgi supposed to ask for advice? How was Seulgi supposed to talk about YooA? 

In short, she couldn't. As far as her friends were concerned, YooA was an untouched topic. All they knew was Irene's unexplained hatred and the lovey-dovey eyes that Seulgi and YooA often exchanged. That was something Irene was especially familiar with.

Irene didn't like it.

Irene scrunched her nose, twitching it like a bunny just for a second before turning to Wendy and laughing at the joke. Something about a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Something about potatoes. Anyway, Irene was sure it was funny. The end line was anyway. Potatoes! Potatoes! Classic.

Seulgi had looked a little off, but Irene wasn't about to ask. She knew Seulgi didn't like to make her feelings terribly public, no matter how frank and open she said she was. Seulgi tended to let things flow free most of the time, yes, but she also didn't like drawing so much attention to herself. Irene could respect that. She also wasn't about to play the role of "caring girlfriend" when YooA was there, draped all over Seulgi.

Irene thought about it. Role of... girlfriend. Just girlfriend. In the long run, YooA could leave the caring to Irene. Yes. Irene would be there to care. No doubt about it. When YooA had long been gone, as Irene was sure she eventually would be, Irene would be there. (Whether sooner or later, Irene was not sure, but she hoped sooner. Oh, boy. She hoped sooner.)

When YooA's hand had carefully placed itself on Seulgi's arm, on her bare skin, Irene knew that even if Seulgi wasn't fully okay, it wasn't her business to pry. YooA was there for now. So, Irene relented. She made up her mind to stop hating YooA, at least so overtly, and let her do her duty. Let her play her role. If Seulgi wanted a girl like her, that was her business. Irene would not interfere.

Seulgi held her stomach, laughing. YooA gazed up at Seulgi's infectious smile and couldn't help but grin alongside the bear-like girl, holding tight onto Seulgi's exposed arm. Irene scrunched up her nose again. 

Some things were so cute that you just wanted to puke.

"Yeah?" Joy cast a sly glance at Irene before allowing mischevious smile spread on her face. A sprinkle of friendly drama meant to bring everyone closer together. "Do you think Irene is nice?"

"Nice?"

Irene raised an eyebrow and shook her head. Ah, Sooyoung. 

"Let's put it like this," Joy decided. "Has she been nice to you ever since you two met?"

"What does that even mean?"

"Come on, now. Has she?"

"Sooyoung-ah, don't make her uncomfortable." Joy just brushed off Irene off. Joy didn't understand what was so hard about the question. Just a little fun, that's all.

"Ah... Well, she was actually very cold to me at first," Seulgi answered honestly, chuckling and reminiscing of the first time she met  _the_  Bae Irene. "She really hated me, I guess, but she warmed up to me. I mean, look at us now." Seulgi's looked straight into Irene's eyes, and Irene wanted to duck under a table. "I think we're doing okay."

Seulgi _hoped_  they were doing okay. To be honest, she had no idea what the absolute fuck was going on. First, they're fighting. Then, they're fighting. Seulgi can't remember fighting Irene as much as she has in the past few months. They've been up and down and all around so many times that just thinking about it makes Seulgi's head want to explode. Plus, just when everything was slowly fixing itself, Irene promptly broke down at Homecoming with the breeze at their backs and the music just a dull thump in their ears. Of course, that meant Seulgi  _had_  to have done something wrong. Seulgi just couldn't figure out what. However, no matter how alarming Homecoming may have seemed, Irene was back to normal the following week. She had remained reserved the first couple days, always giving that tight-lipped smile that tipped you off, letting you know something was weighing on her mind. After that, Irene was back to smiling and giggling and being the charismatic happy girl that most people knew her as. Seulgi had wanted to comfort her or hug her or  _something_. But, she hadn't done anything. She'd wanted to tell Irene that it was okay to not be okay and that she was here for her, but Seulgi knew that they weren't in a place for Irene to so easily open up again.

"Just okay?" Joy teased before pushing further. "Is she nice now, at least?"

"When she wants to be," Seulgi joked with a smile. Irene frowned. "Yeri's nicer, though."

"Yah!" Yeri protested in response to the laughter that had overtaken the group, causing them to double over in laughter.

"So, very kind," Joy added with a wink, grinning at Yeri who rolled her eyes up at the ceiling at the greasy gesture.

They all knew that while Yeri was kind deep down, she was also the most vicious and savage of the bunch. Even YooA had learned that quickly. When Yeri and YooA first met after news traveled of the new Seulgi and YooA couple. Yeri had taken one precursory glance at YooA before turning to Seulgi and asking, "This the best you can do?"

YooA knew not to mess with Yeri after that.

"I'm nice," Irene tried to joke along. She was nice to Seulgi. She thought she was. "Sometimes you're just asking for it."

"Oh, that's not possible. I mean, look at this face. Am I right?" Girlfriend YooA swooping in to save her precious Seul. "Look at my precious bear."

Correction. To save her precious  _bear_.

"Maybe you just like being mean." Seulgi tilted her head to the side, and Irene couldn't tell but Seulgi's smile seemed to be shining brighter.

Irene felt something well up in the corner of her eye. She was strong. "You like it," she said with an imaginary mic drop before strutting off to the bathroom. Though she left with a strong comeback, she felt like letting everything drop off her shoulders. She thought she could it -- friendly conversation -- but it was so  _hard_. All Irene could do was stare at every interaction between Seulgi and YooA, over examining the meaning of every touch and wishing so badly that she was the one by Seulgi's side instead. 

And what did Seulgi mean, she was mean? Irene didn't remember being mean, and Irene didn't like Seulgi talking about her like that. How was she supposed to hold a candle to cute, caring YooA when in Seulgi's mind, Irene started out as a bitch? YooA started out as the cute girl who slowly Seulgi's heart through determination and notes. She did all the stuff you dreamed of. How come YooA got such a perfect beginning while Irene had started out as a thorn in Seulgi's side?

Irene had actually really liked the girl when they first met. Seulgi had been so cute and endearing with her bear-like features and powerful determination. Seulgi had always filled Seulgi up with newfound energy, cheering her on with a hug and quick pump of the fists before saying "Fighting!"

Irene had always shaken her head with a smile, trying not to be too excited by the younger's aegyo. It had always been so cute. And now, it seemed, it was a million times cuter and stabbing Irene in the heart every chance it got. Around her friends, Irene had needed to take several deep breaths to calm the thumping in her chest when Seulgi looked straight at her with those sharp eyes, filled with kindness. Irene really liked them. She'd also been so tempted to forget about YooA, metaphorically and not at all actually shoving YooA, sending her tumbling to the floor with a fire in her eyes before straddling Seulgi and cupping those soft, chubby cheeks before pressing her lips against Seulgi's pink ones, tasting what Irene imagined to be something very sweet. Or Pringles. Seulgi really liked her Pringles, after all. Irene had no idea how Seulgi managed to keep those abs -- Jesus Christ, Irene forgot about the abs -- while still snacking on the amount of Pringles that she did on the daily. Incredible.

Seulgi was incredible. Seulgi-

"Seulgi!" Irene nearly screamed the name and not in the way she wanted to. Oh, god. She needed a cleanse.

"Oh, sorry," Seulgi chuckled, giving Irene a sheepish smile. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"Y-yeah, um, what brings you here?"

"This is a bathroom."

"Right."

"I'm kidding, Irene. I came to check up on you. You looked bothered." Seulgi wished she could ask Irene directly what was wrong, but that just didn't feel like the right move. Then again, Seulgi didn't even know what the right move would be. She took a look at Irene's bewildered face.  _Is it the same stuff that bothered you at Homecoming?_

"Ha. Very funny." Irene forced her body to loosen up. "I'm okay. I just felt like taking a break."

"Want some company?"

"Don't you need to get back to your girlfriend?" Irene teased the younger girl. Irene groaned on the inside, wondering why she was resorting to such tactics, knowing that she was trying to draw a certain response.

"She can manage." Well, Irene guessed, Seulgi sort of hit the mark. Irene would've preferred to hear something along the lines of "you're my priority," or "I needed to check on you first", but Seulgi's answer would do,

Irene let a small smile cross her face, setting Seulgi at ease. "I'm sure she misses you already."

"Maybe," Seulgi agreed, before setting Irene's heart on fire. "But I wanted to come check on you first."

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"Fuck what?"

"What?" Did she say that out loud? Shit. "Nothing. I just remembered something."

"You want to talk about it?" Seulgi asked hopefully.

"No, it's fine," Irene said before clearing her throat, trying to purge herself of the idea that maybe, just maybe, Seulgi really cared. After all, Seulgi wanted to come check on her  _first_. Before YooA.

"Oh, okay." Seulgi felt sort of disappointed. She'd come hoping to maybe understand Irene better, to return things slightly back to the way they used to be, but here Irene was closing up again. Seulgi almost considered yelling, "Open, sesame!" Maybe that'd get the door to stay open.

"Yeah, so, um, I'm fine. Really. You can go back to YooA." Irene wanted to punch herself. Of course, she wanted Seulgi to stay. At the same time, the lack of conversation topics was really starting to make Irene wish she could rescind her head into a shell like a turtle and hide.

"I'll go, then."

As Seulgi took a step towards the exit, Irene found herself compelled by some higher power to speak, a topic throwing itself towards Seulgi, waiting for Seulgi to catch it. "Did you mean it when you said I was cold to you?"

"Huh?" Seulgi turned around, catching it less with her hands and more with her face, considering her dumbstruck expression and slow processing time. Conversation concussion.

"Cold," repeated Irene. "Did you mean it when you said I used to be cold to you?"

"Oh, that." Seulgi finally registered what was happening after a few long moments. First, she was lowkey being kicked out so Irene could have alone time, next thing she knows, Irene is asking her questions she doesn't find safe to answer. Seulgi attempted to tread carefully. "You were cold to me in the beginning, unnie."

"Just the beginning, hmm?"

Seulgi decided against addressing that. While Irene became very kind, there had been times where Seulgi hadn't even been sure Irene even like her. From stoic stares to slaps and shoves, Irene had constantly flipped from hot to cold as quick as a snap of the fingers. "You did a lot of things that I... I couldn't help but think of as cold, but as time went on, I realized that you just showed your caring in a different way. When you scolded me, you were just looking out for me. I know you were shy with expressing your true feelings, so even though it took a long time to get to- Um, get to where we are now, it's been worth it." Seulgi finished with an unsure smile.

Irene felt like a weight was being lifted off her chest, and she went forward to hug Seulgi. Seulgi was so warm (and startled, not that Irene could see, with her face buried in Seulgi's neck) that Irene never wanted to let go. Finally, when Irene felt like Seulgi would scurry away in uncertainty if they hugged for any longer, Irene let go and waved Seulgi off. "I'll head back in a sec."

"Okay. Don't be too long, unnie."

"I won't."

Seulgi left the bathroom with her chest feeling lighter. Irene didn't seem to have any harsh feelings toward her so whatever Seulgi didn't, Seulgi guessed it wasn't that bad. Whatever had been on Irene's mind seemed to have disappeared, and Seulgi was glad to see her unnie smile. It'd been a while since Irene had smiled so brightly for her. Because of her. Seulgi settled back into her seat feeling accomplished in her friendship duties and allowed YooA onto her lap. While Irene had not really told her what was wrong, Irene had opened up just a bit, just enough. Seulgi let herself revel in the success. She was tired of hurting people. It was nice that for once, she was able to make someone happy.

Irene squealed and jumped as soon as Seulgi's slim frame disappeared out the door. Seulgi didn't hold any harsh feelings toward her, and Irene wasn't actually mean! Irene slightly berated herself for not seeming warmer, but she was relieved to hear that Seulgi had understood. She truly had liked the girl when they first met, and she was glad that despite the little mistranslation of feelings into actions, Seulgi eventually understood. Irene always had found it hard to be as brazen as Seulgi could be. So brave.

Irene felt all warm and fuzzy on the inside from the hug and secretly patted herself on the back, remembering that Seulgi had come specifically to check on her. Over YooA. Now, Irene knew that there hadn't been anything to really check up on YooA for, but still. It's the little victories that count. Irene wanted to jump again for joy, so she did, and she stared into the mirror. Her heart was still beating fast from nuzzling her face into Seulgi's neck. She'd done it so many times yet now, it sent her mind going haywire. Irene needed a breather before she could return to the group without looking like she ran the mile.

Seulgi made Irene feel like a young schoolgirl (yes, she technically  _was_  a schoolgirl, but still) and it was honestly kind of refreshing to Irene. Well, it was now that Irene was not at the moment borderline crying over her friend. At the moment, Irene could only feel the high of her crush, (mostly) innocent in nature and full of warmth. 

 _Kang Seulgi,_ Irene thought to herself, looking in the mirror with a smile.  _Do you know what you do to me?_

Irene took a deep breath while standing in the doorway, ready to leave. She took a step and breathed in deeply through her nose before exhaling out the jitters that shook her hands. Seulgi and her had hugged. Irene could still feel it -- the strong arms of Seulgi wrapped around her waist, the feeling of Seulgi's neck against her face. And the warmth. Very fuzzy, very cuddly, very warm, warmth.  She made her way back to her friends, taking note of YooA now sitting in Seulgi's lap, and sat back down in her seat, still thinking, her shoulders suddenly feeling heavy again.

_And do you know what Bo Gum will do when he finds out?_


	14. Can't Think Straight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Irene's been distracted lately, and it's starting to get noticed. She might also have exposed her dilemma. Just a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some brief mention of mature themes.

"Yeah, so..." Irene stopped her sentence as she stopped by the door of her classroom, which Wendy had kindly walked her to so that Irene could finish speaking. Irene had looked so bothered at lunch that when Wendy had asked if something was wrong and the girl had been quick in motioning for Wendy to follow, Wendy could only comply, padding after her troubled friend. Irene moved up on her toes, restless. "I just don't know what to do."

"That really is a difficult situation." Wendy nodded slowly, pulling Irene in for a hug before letting go and saying, "But are you sure this is strictly theoretical?"

"Y-yes, what makes you think it isn't?" Irene replied too quickly and pursed her lips, something that didn't go unnoticed by Wendy, before beginning to enter the classroom. "Theoretical. That's it."

"If you say so, unnie. I don't know if I can give you much advice, but I'm here if you want to talk more."

"Thanks, Wan-ah." Irene smiled, and Wendy turned to leave but froze when Irene spoke again. "I wasn't looking for advice. This is something I have to figure out on my own. But thanks. Really." Irene kissed Wendy's cheek before leaving for real, a statue of a Wendy standing still in the hallway. If Irene was trying to distract her, it'd worked.

_Did Irene just kiss me? Weird._

Wendy wondered whether the boyfriend Irene talked about was was Bo Gum, whether the girl was Irene, and who the third person was. Could Irene be cheating? On _Bo Gum_? Wendy quickly threw that idea to the side, finding it impossible to believe that Irene Bae of all people could be cheating on Bo Gum. No, Irene wouldn't do that. Never. So then who was she talking about? Who was the mysterious third party involved in the highly hypothetical situation?

Wendy wondered for a brief second whether it could be her. Wendy Son.

But that was just as impossible as Irene cheating. There was no way Irene could be infatuated with a girl like her. If anyone, the girl would be Seulgi, who everybody liked. Wendy was always the second choice, and she didn't see how she'd become first now.

Wendy finished walking to her class and snorted a laugh. She didn't even know why she was thinking about this. Irene was Irene, after all.

Straight.

"Wendy?"

"Huh?" Wendy quickly scooped her things up from the ground where they'd clattered very loudly, drawing the brief three-second attention span of all her classmates and the apparently longer one of Eunji.

"Nice going, Son!"

Wendy groaned. And that of Chanyeol.

"Shut up, Park!" Wendy picked up the last stray pencil that had managed to roll away before plopping her things down on her desk and taking a seat next to the pretty girl with the dazzling smile. "Anyway, what's up?"

Eunji giggled and topped Wendy's pile of things with an eraser. "You dropped this."

"Ah, uh, thanks," Wendy tucked the eraser back into her pencil case, where it belonged.

"Something wrong?" Eunji scooted closer and examined Wendy, looking into her eyes. "You seemed pretty distracted when you walked in. I mean, you did drop your things."

"Oh, yeah, that," Wendy said, propping her feet up on the desk. "Just was thinking."

"About what?"

"You."

"Stop, you flirt," Eunji laughed and playfully pushed Wendy, who smiled and laughed too. "You're too much sometimes."

"You like it."

"Hm, yeah, I do." Eunji booped Wendy's nose. "Got to go. Class starts in a minute. I'll see you later, Wendy." Eunji flashed one last smile at Wendy before turning and waving bye to her friends. Wendy watched Eunji's back disappear from the classroom and she exhaled. Damn, that girl was pretty.

Irene was pretty too. Wendy didn't know why she thought of that, but it was true. So whoever that third party was, whatever lucky guy, Wendy was sure there was no question about whether Irene would succeed. A better question to ask would be who could resist?

Riddle her that.

 

Irene blew air up at her forehead and tapped her pencil against her desk, not in the mood for calculus. She didn't want to think about derivatives or integrals or whatever it was they were doing. Yeah, she didn't even know what they were doing. 

"Irene!"

"Yes, Teacher Kim?" Irene answered, bowing her head to hide her oncoming embarrassment.

"Can you tell us the answer?"

"Uh... five?" That response drew a few good-natured laughs and a shake of the head from Teacher Kim.

"Very funny. The answer is x squared..." Teacher Kim scribbled on the board, writing what she spoke, "plus three root two... all over... x cubed minus five." Irene really liked the purple Expo marker, bright against the whiteboard. It was pretty. "So, I suppose you got one number right out of the entire answer. I also supposed that you would've gotten the  _entire_  answer correct if you'd been paying attention."

"Sorry, Teacher Kim."

Teacher Kim just sighed and continued teaching. "Now, let's learn how to turn this... back into this..."

When class ended, Irene got up from her desk and slung her backpack on her shoulder, preparing to leave when she heard her teacher call for her.

"Irene."

The girl froze in front of the doorway, turning slowly on her heels to meet the unwavering eyes of her teacher. Irene walked to the teacher's desk and after glancing down at clasped hands, began, "Teacher Kim, I really am sorry-"

The hands unclasped and one lifted to shut Irene up. "That's not what I wanted to talk to you about, Irene."

"Oh. Um. Okay. What is it?"

"Are you okay?"

"What?"

"I'm asking if you're okay, Irene. You seem distracted lately."

"I mean, I guess I have been a little off these past few days."

"I think it's been going on a little longer than that." Irene cursed in her head when she saw the paper that her teacher was sliding toward her. "You see this, Irene?"

"Yes, Teacher Kim."

"This is the quiz that we took just last week, and that," Teacher Kim pointed to the red pen scrawled across the top, a number circle, "is your grade. Do you see why I asked to speak with you?"

Irene pressed her lips together, looking at the quiz. Not too hot. "Yes."

"Look, Irene. I didn't ask you here to interrogate you about your life or your grades, but I am a teacher, and as a teacher, I do care that my students are doing well. Your grades are slipping and you always look like you're... mentally elsewhere. If you don't focus up, I'm afraid your grades will suffer more than you'll be able to fix, and not just in this class. I know that you haven't been doing all your homework in English."

"She told you?"

The teacher snorted. "Communication is key in relationships, Irene."

"Right." Irene couldn't help but think again of her (as Wendy suspected) not-so-theoretical situation.

Communication. Bo Gum.

Communicate  _to_  Bo Gum. To Seulgi.

Break up. Confess.

Mess.

No, thanks.

"Anyway, Taeyeon doesn't actually tell me everything about her students but since this seemed to be a pattern, she thought it only right to bring it to my attention. Imagine her surprise, and mine as well, to see that this... slump, of yours, was not confined to just one class." She paused before asking, "And it's not just our two classes either, is it, Irene?"

Irene ducked her head down, tucking her chin and looking at the ground. "No, Teacher Kim."

"I'm not trying to scold you, Irene, I'm really not. I just want you to be careful and take it a little easier on yourself with whatever it is that's got you so distracted."  _If only I could._ "I want you to go see the nurse."

"What? Why?" Irene felt alarmed. She didn't need to go see the nurse!

Tiffany gave her a strange look. "Well, I figured you could use a break. I'll let Taeyeon know. If she has a problem with it, she can take it up with me personally."

"Oh, okay. Thank you, Teacher Kim."

"Of course. I'll see you later. With your homework done. Right?"

"Right." Irene nodded apologetically and left, walking through the hallways and finally through the doors of the nurse's office.

"Hello?" The nurse's voice rang out from where Irene couldn't see.

"Hi," Irene said. "My teacher thought I needed a break and told me to go see the nurse." Now that Irene had said it out loud, it sounded like a pretty dumb excuse, but the nurse only nodded solemnly.

"I see. You do look a bit distracted. Oh, sorry. I don't mean to pry."

"No, not at all. My teacher noticed, too. That's why she sent me here."

"Nothing like a little break to let you breathe a little. Follow me." The nurse led Irene towards a bed. "Go ahead and take a nap, Do you have any after-school commitments?"

"Yes. I have a student council meeting."

"Well, consider it canceled. Doctor's orders. Nurse's, actually, but you get it."

Irene chuckled at the joke. "I do."

"Excuse me? Hello?"

The nurse turned toward the voice. "Looks like we have another visitor. Just take a nap, and- Oh, did you need to make the bus?"

"No. It's okay."

"Great, then I'll check on you once school ends. If you're fast asleep, I'd say another hour or so of napping wouldn't hurt, and then you leave whenever. Well, maybe not _when_ ever. I do have to go home at some point. I'm Nurse Seohyun, by the way. Just call if you need anything. Hello? Yes!"

Seohyun was out the door and greeting the student who had walked inside. Irene closed her eyes, folding her legs up towards her body, and she slept like a baby, the world around her nothing but a dream.

An awful dream.

 

Irene was awoken by gentle taps and a soft voice calling her name. Angelic.

"Irene. Unnie? Hey. Hyun."

"Let me sleep..." Irene rolled over and was about to shut her eyes when she all of a sudden sat up. "Seulgi?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to check on you. You weren't in English, and Teacher Kim, Taeyeon seonsaengnim, said you went to the nurse, so... Uh. Yeah."

"Oh, well, the other Teacher Kim made me come."

"Is everything okay?" Seulgi's brow creased as she looked at Irene's reassuring smile, saying everything was okay even though something was off. Seulgi just didn't know what it was. Was it the Homecoming stuff?

"I just needed a break from things. Took a nap. Nice nap."

Seulgi's eyes widened. "I didn't mean to wake you. Sorry. I just wanted to make sure you were okay but I woke you up entirely..." Seulgi trailed off and twiddled her thumbs. "Sorry unnie."

"Hey, no. Don't apologize. It was about time I woke up anyway." Irene yawned, covering her mouth with her palm. "What time is it?"

Seulgi glanced up at the clock on the wall, ticking away. "Late enough. Almost six. Have you eaten? Actually, wait. Of course, you haven't. You've been sleeping. Let's go eat."

"Us two?"

"Do you see anybody else here?" Seulgi picked up a pamphlet and pointed at the kid with the exaggerated smile. "Hey, you." Seulgi made her voice really high. "Me?" Her voice lowered again. "Yeah, you. Would you like to eat with me and that pretty girl over there? That's my friend." Seulgi looked from the pamphlet to Irene, pretending to show the paper boy who Irene was. "Wow! I'd love to!" Seulgi nodded at the pamphlet. "Good choice." Seulgi then spoke to Irene again. "And look at this. He's even smiling!"

Irene snorted. The smile did not reach the kid's eyes, which to Irene, screamed,  _Help!_  "I'm sure he is."

"Now there's a  _real_  smile," Seulgi said seriously to the pamphlet, before putting down the boy with the fake smile and turning her attention to the girl with the real one. "Let's go."

"Hey, Seul?"

"What?" Seulgi asked in reply, sitting in the driver's seat.

"What were you doing at school? I thought you would've gone home."

"I would've, but, uh, basketball season is starting soon. Thought I'd practice a bit."

Irene had a feeling Seulgi wasn't telling her everything, but she didn't push it. "That's exciting! I'll be there for your first game, cheering you on."

Seulgi's face lit up. "Really? Yay! Moonbyul will be happy to know that people will come and support the team."

"As if you needed this one face for support when all your fangirls and even your fan _boys_  will be there. Plus, I'm sure the rest of the team's fans and friends will all show up. Yongsun, too."

If there were ever two people attached at the hip, it was Moonbyul and Yongsun. Moonbyul was the captain of the basketball team, and Yongsun was captain of the cheer squad. Both Moonbyul and Yongsun were also very flirty, making boys and girls blush left and right. They were hot, and they knew it. Irene was jealous. If only she could wield such power. Then she'd definitely have Seulgi to herself. Moonbyul and Yongsun were also the best of friends, just like Seulgi and Irene were supposed to be. However, Moonbyul and Yongsun seemed like they were doing better than Seulgi and Irene. Much closer, much more comfortable. Moonbyul and Yongsun were like a cute married couple, while Seulgi and Irene seemed more like an awkward going-on-a-first-date kind of couple. Yikes.

"Yongsun is always there," Seulgi said fondly, remembering Yongsun's loud voice cheering from the sidelines. Yongsun, as cheer captain, was always at their games, yelling at the top of her lungs and kicking her incredibly flexible -- seriously, Seulgi was in awe of her flexibility -- legs up in the air effortlessly. She was always a friendly face. "She really is a good cheerleader."

"Is YooA a cheerleader?" Irene casually asked. It was a weird question, and she knew it. Didn't hurt to ask.

"No, why?"

"Oh, nothing," replied Irene, who couldn't stop herself from saying, "I might try out for the squad's winter season, that's all."

"Wait, really?" Seulgi was so confused. "Since when did you like cheering?"

"I've been thinking about it for a while," Irene lied. "I dance, I'm flexible, and I thought it might be nice to do a sport at school for once."

"So you chose cheerleading."

"Something wrong?" Irene challenged.

Seulgi chuckled and backed off. "No, no. Just surprised, is all. I mean, you should totally go for it. Give you an excuse to see me more," Seulgi waggled her eyebrows, almost causing Irene to choke, "which you want to, of course. You'd also probably murder half the student body in one of those cheerleading uniforms. They're a bit... revealing, I guess." Irene felt her face warm up at the idea of Seulgi seeing her in revealing clothing. Jesus. "Anyway, yeah. I'm just surprised. I've never heard you talk about it."

"Yongsun actually tried to convince me to join for the fall season." Not a lie, though it was less convincing and more suggesting. "I didn't say yes then, obviously, but the idea has been there. It's been... marinating." Irene said the last word for the sole purpose of teasing Seulgi with how weird and uncomfortable the word sounded coming from Irene's mouth. Seulgi's nose crinkled on cue, and she stuck her tongue out at Irene.

"Don't say that."

"Marinating."

"No."

"Mari-"

"Get out."

"You love me."

"And I might stop if you say that word one more time."

"Mar-"

"Irene!"

Once Irene had finally stopped teasing Seulgi, they drove in a comfortable silence. Seulgi forced Irene to pick somewhere to eat, and Irene had thrown out the name of some ramen place. Irene leaned back and rested her head on the seat, staring at Seulgi's concentrated expression. She was so focused on the road, and her mouth was quirked up at one side. How cute.

Irene thought about the whole cheerleading thing again.

Irene had never really seen herself as a cheerleader. It's not that she didn't enjoy cheering or whatever, it just had never seriously occurred to her. She's always found herself gravitating more toward her student council duties and curating responsibility rather than student spirit. Well, that was part of her job as Class President, but she wasn't waving pom poms around to do it. She didn't yell with a wide smile on her face, instead boosting morale with soft smiles and greetings and careful planning on her part. School activities and the like.

Cheerleading didn't seem like a bad idea. Irene was indeed a dancer, and she really was flexible. She'd let Seulgi find that out in a heartbeat. She slapped a hand to her face when she thought of that, prompting Seulgi to glance over but return her eyes to the road upon the lack of eye contact from Irene, who was suddenly concentrating extra hard on the car's side mirror.

Irene pictured herself in a cheerleading uniform. Seulgi was right. They  _were_  revealing.

Only to an extent, of course. They were still  _school_  uniforms, though very much not exactly what the dress code's standards would call appropriate. In one of those uniforms, Irene would be wearing a short, pleated, maroon skirt with a yellow lining and a long sleeve v-neck crop top, a yellow stripe running along the neckline. The school's knight mascot was etched on the left breast, the school's initials lettered under. It was a uniform made complete with white cheer shoes and maroon short pants because, for some reason, the school hadn't bought skorts, and decided separate spandex would be better. At least there was  _something_  to protect the little modesty she'd have left in that uniform. She'd be eye-catching, to say the least, probably drawing the attention of people as she pranced around wearing nearly nothing on the side of a basketball court.

But she'd get to see Seulgi. A lot. And if she could do that, she'd prance wearing nearly nothing for as long as the cheer squad wanted. Needed? Were they required to stay full games? Irene would figure that out later.

She'd get to see Seulgi's toned body run up and down that basketball, sweat glistening on her forehead as she worked hard, maybe taking a cursory look at the stands and the sidelines, then taking a little longer of a look at Irene's body in that tight uniform, maybe later taking a look at Irene's body _without_  the uniform...

Irene tried concentrating harder on that side mirror as her face felt even warmer. It didn't work.

Seeing Irene squirm in the passenger seat, Seulgi opened her mouth to say something before deciding against it and looking back at the road. She really,  _really_  wanted to know what had Irene so... jittery? Naturally, Seulgi was curious. It'd been ten straight minutes of Irene looking so, well, something. Maybe she had to pee. Seulgi didn't get why else Irene would press her thighs together like that. Unless...

Oh.

"Seulgi?!" Irene clutched onto the grab handle as Seulgi uncharacteristically drove, to say the least, like an absolute maniac, nearly causing them to crash and sending them straight over a curb.

Little did Irene know, it was Seulgi's turn to blush, the bear's face red in color and hot to the touch.

"Sorry," mumbled Seulgi, trying to collect her thoughts, which had all scattered and jumbled at the thought of Irene being... Seulgi didn't want to think about it again. If she did, she'd probably crash. But since when did this kind of stuff make her so embarrassed?

They could talk about stuff like this. They  _had_  talked about stuff like this. It wasn't until that moment that Seulgi realized just how long it'd been since the last conversation they'd had about, well, that stuff. Yeah. That was probably why she was embarrassed, trying to erase the dirty thoughts that kept popping up in her head now that her hyperactive imagination was at work.

"You just passed it," Irene said, confused.

"Sorry," Seulgi mumbled again, turning the car around. She needed to get her act together and her mind out of the gutter. She was spending time with her friend, Irene, and it was time to focus. Ugh, why did she have to start thinking about this kind of stuff? She could take care of herself later. Later, yeah, and not now, but still, Okay, yeah. Focus... Seulgi shut her mind off as she turned the key. The engine shuddered and went quiet, and Irene was the first to exit the car.

"You coming, or what?" Irene teased the driver, whose butt stayed glued to the seat. "Let's go, slowpoke."

"Right, yeah. Coming." Seulgi pulled the key from the ignition and went to catch up to Irene.

She scolded herself as she walked in the parking lot, decreasing the distance between her and the increasingly impatient Irene who jumped up and down, waving like a madman. Seulgi  _felt_  like a madman.

"Hurry up, Seulgi!" Irene called. She didn't look uncomfortable at all the way she did in the car, squirming with her legs shut.

Seulgi sighed and quickened her pace, trying not to think about sex.

Really, _really_ trying.

Oh, boy.


	15. And It All Came Crashing Down (for the Better)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cheerleading and basketball season start for the winter, and Irene and Wendy have an interesting conversation.

Irene instinctively raised her hands to cover her ears and found a pair already covering them for her.

It was the day of tryouts for cheerleading, and the gym was packed full of shouts and thumps as shoes collided with the wooden floorboards after leaps and flips and turns. Irene scanned the gym and felt the adrenaline rush through her veins with the thrill of competition. Her heart raced and her hands felt clammy. She felt so out of place among the cheerleaders who cheered like it was a natural instinct. Irene had always been more of a smile-and-wave, be-polite kind of girl rather than the loud and peppy be-a-best-friend-to-everyone kind of girl that cheerleaders always seemed to be.

The nerves were really kicking in. Her stomach did a flip every single time someone did an actual flip. It was starting to make Irene feel dizzy.

"You're going to have to get used to this if you want to cheer," Seulgi laughed. She took her hands away from Irene's ears and whistled. "This is intense."

"Very."

"Are you nervous?"

"Extremely."

"Well, don't be. I'm sure you'll do great."

"Not sure your faith is enough to carry me through these tough times." Irene playfully poked Seulgi's stomach.

"Then I guess you're just a lost cause," Seulgi sighed dramatically, raising the back of her hand to her forehead.

"Oh, stop."

Irene and Seulgi watched a couple of girls wave pompoms in the corner while kicking their legs high up into the air. Joy was over by some girls that Irene didn't know very well, looking like she belonged. Unlike Irene, Joy was a veteran cheerleader. Well, Joy had been on the squad since her freshman year, at least.

A peppy girl bounded over towards Irene and bounced on her heels excitedly.

"Irene! You came," Yongsun grabbed Irene's hands and shook them with such eagerness that Irene had to wonder for a second what this girl was on.

"Yeah," Irene said with a smile.

"You excited?"

"More like nervous," Irene snorted. "Everyone here looks like they know what they're doing."

"Oh, please, Irene," Yongsun said. "You're just as capable as anyone in here."

"You're just saying that."

"Irene, seriously. You're hella flexible and you can dance and you can be peppy and happy and full of spirit! That's all you need, okay?" Yongsun poked Irene in the chest. "It's about what's in here, not here." Yongsun then tapped the side of Irene's head.

"Oh-kay," Irene said. She surveyed her competition, deep in thought when Yongsun tugged at her elbow,

"Come with me, Irene," Yongsun said, pulling Irene along. "I'll introduce you to some of the girls. You're going to love the squad so much!"

Irene gave Seulgi an apologetic smile and waved before turning her attention to Yongsun.

"Here's the deal, Irene. I  _know_  that you'd make an amazing cheerleader, okay? You just have to believe in yourself!"

"Sounds like a very cheerleader thing to say."

"That's why I'm captain, huh? Anyway, I think you're a shoo-in for the squad, so don't sweat the tryout. Just follow along with what I do, keep up, and look good." Yongsun looked Irene up and down. "Oh, who am I kidding? You always look good!"

"Uh, thanks?"

"No problem." Yongsun looked at the clock. "Oh, I guess it's time for tryouts! Good luck!"

"Thanks."

Irene took a deep breath and twiddled her thumbs, reminding herself why she was doing this again.

School spirit. Athletics. Seulgi.

Seulgi.

Ugh, Seulgi. Why was she so perfect? And sweet? And just all-around the most amazing person ever?

And why was she, Irene, the absolute worst?

As she stood there, nodding half-heartedly back at Yongsun who was shooting her a smile from across the gym, she thought of Bo Gum and their relationship.

It was nice pretending like she didn't have a boyfriend. But too bad she did.

 

"How were tryouts?" Bo Gum asked as he picked Irene up in his car for a lift back home.

"Good. Great, actually," Irene said in response, looking out the window. "Made the squad."

"That's awesome!" Bo Gum sounded so excitedly on Irene's behalf that Irene felt like she was going to throw up.

"Yeah."

"You okay, Irene?"

"Yeah, I'm okay."

Bo Gum didn't look convinced but he dropped the subject and drove Irene home in silence.

"Hey, Bo Gum?"

"What's up?"

_Do it, Irene. Do it!_

"Uh, nothing." She mentally slapped herself.  _Great job._

Bo Gum turned his attention back to the road. "Okay."

"Actually..."

"Yeah?"

"Nevermind."

"Look, Irene," Bo Gum pulled the car over and looked at his girlfriend, "are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, Bo Gum. I'm sure, okay? Could you just please drive me home?"

Bo Gum sighed and put the car back in drive. "Whatever you say, Irene."

When Bo Gum finally pulled into Irene's driveway, he leaned over to kiss Irene before sitting back in his seat.

"Bo Gum, I-" Irene felt her throat dry up at the sight of the innocently quizzical expression on Bo Gum's boyish face, the tediously built up courage rushing out of her with a  _whoosh!_  of breath -- an exhale. His hair was slightly tousled, his mouth hanging open with a response ready on his tongue. He was still smiling and happy to see Irene, be with Irene, even though she was being distant. She knew she was being distant.

Irene opened the door of the car and stepped out, bending down to peak back into the car for a final goodbye. "Thanks for the ride."

"Of course. See you tomorrow."

"See you."

Irene hurried into her house and rushed up the stairs to her room. She flopped on the bed and buried her face in the pillow and whisper-yelled as loud as she could without shattering the eardrums of anyone else in the household. She huffed and rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling.

Why was this so hard?

Irene loved Bo Gum. She really did. Just not the same way she used to.

But that didn't mean she didn't _care_ about him. 

He was still the kind, sweet guy that she had met all those months ago, who was there for her when she needed even when she didn't do the same for him. She didn't deserve him. She was stringing him along, letting him live in the bliss of ignorance thinking that she still loved him when her heart was elsewhere, sitting in the hands of someone who was also kind and sweet and amazing.

And taken.

Irene took her laptop from her backpack and typed into the search bar, "Am I gay?"

She scrolled through the search results and clicked on a test.

 _Are you romantically interested men?_ Bo Gum and her crushes before him.

 _Are you romantically interested in women?_ Seulgi, yes. No one before that.

 _Are you sexually attracted to men?_ Yes.

 _Are you sexually attracted to women?_  ...Also yes.

Irene's cheeks flushed at the thought of the day where she and Seulgi had been stuck in that agonizingly long car ride, her thighs pressed together and mind wandering in so many unwanted directions leading all back to Seulgi, looking sexy as ever, and Irene wanting those clothes  _off_.

Jesus.

Irene quickly finished the test and blinked at her screen.

 _You are bisexual! You are attracted romantically and sexually to both men and women, though you may have heterosexual tendencies_.

That sounded just about right to Irene. Seulgi was her first girl crush, after all. First girl crush after so many on just guys. So that was bisexuality, huh? Liking both girls and guys? When Irene thought about it, she guessed she was bi. She didn't know what else to call it. But maybe it was a fluke. Seulgi really was her first girl crush. Maybe she'd be Irene's  _only_  ever girl crush.

But that was still a girl crush. A tad bit not straight.

Irene sat there wondering whether she should even break up Bo Gum. Maybe the crush on Seulgi would fade and she and Bo Gum could be happy again. Both of them. Together. Maybe she and Seulgi could just be best friends like always, Bo Gum by Irene's side and stupid YooA by Seulgi's.

Ah, stupid YooA. Jealousy.

Irene took the test again, choosing the answers she knew would lead her to her desired outcome, looking unsurprised when the screen read,

_You are heterosexual! You are attracted romantically and sexually to exclusively men._

Irene sighed. Reading the answer felt just as fake as she'd hoped it wouldn't. She wasn't straight. Not anymore. She couldn't say she was straight. She was bisexual, attracted to both men and women; people like Bo Gum and like Seulgi.

Bisexual.

Irene looked up at her ceiling again. She wasn't straight. She wasn't straight at all. Well, she was half-straight. Half-gay? Gay. Bisexual. Half-gay. Half-lesbian?

Irene closed her laptop screen and fell back on her sheets. She didn't want to think about breaking up with Bo Gum. but she knew that she had to. She had to in order to protect him  _and_  her. At the same time, though, it's not like Irene would be able to do anything with Seulgi if they broke up.

Selfish thoughts, Irene!

Irene groaned and covered her face with her hands. Breaking up with Bo Gum was the right thing to do, no matter how hard. The spark wasn't there and she couldn't continue this lie. She couldn't continue pretending that she loved him. She was just leading him on and digging herself a deeper hole.

But at the same time...

No, Irene. No.

She'd just have to do it. She'd have to break up with him.

And then she could be free. Free to date whoever she wished and free to date Seulgi...

Except Seulgi wasn't free to date her. That is, assuming Seulgi even liked her. Seulgi liked YooA. Seulgi loved YooA. Irene didn't stand a chance. But Bo Gum didn't stand a chance to Seulgi, and Irene couldn't keep pretending otherwise. She needed to end things before they got messy. She had already choked up trying to break up with him at his car...

Irene made up her mind.

She was going to break up with Bo Gum.

 

"Hey, Gummy," Irene said, taking a seat next to her boyfriend during lunch.

"Hey, Irene," Bo Gum said back, kissing Irene's cheek and giving her hand a squeeze.

Irene forced a laugh, which, in Wendy's opinion, was obviously forced, though no one else seemed to pay it any mind. Bo Gum had some stupid smile on his face that held no trace of malice, no sense of how Irene was going to break his heart. 

Wendy supposed she didn't actually _know_ whether Irene was going to break up with Bo Gum, but, well, wasn't she?

"You got a little-"

"I know, I got it, Seulgi," Irene said irritably, wiping away the droplets of milk that had dribbled down her chin and pushing Seulgi's hand away from her face.

Seulgi crinkled her brow and turned away from Irene, instead striking up a conversation with Yeri, who had an eyebrow raised at Irene's cold behavior. Wendy pursed her lips and watched as Irene smiled brightly for her boyfriend; a complete 180 from the attitude she'd just given Seulgi. Maybe Wendy was wrong. Maybe Irene wasn't going to break up with her boyfriend. 

But then why did Irene look so... bothered? Was that the word?

Wendy didn't know how to interpret Irene's behavior. Maybe that meant Wendy should stop trying. 

"Unnie," Yeri said, prodding Wendy's shoulder with the end of a fork. "Can I have your chicken?"

"Yeah, go ahead," Wendy said absentmindedly.

"Don't mind if I do." Yeri stabbed the chicken and brought it to her own tray, cutting it up and happily stuffing her mouth as Joy reached over to sneak a piece for herself, which she kindly split with Sungjae. He obediently opened his mouth and allowed Joy to feed him. Yeri looked on disapprovingly. Disgustingly cute.

Wendy wondered if she should just  _ask_ Irene, but at the same time, wouldn't Irene have told her if she was ready? Wendy watched Irene's hand attach itself to Bo Gum's arm, Irene's mouth opening wide in raucous laughter at one of Bo Gum's -- in Wendy's opinion --  _lame_  jokes. Sometimes, he was funny. Wendy would give him that. Most of the time, though, Wendy could get better jokes from a rock. Good thing Bo Gum had other things to make him appealing. Wendy didn't really get why Irene was laughing at some dumb joke that was maybe about shopping carts. (Wendy was not paying attention.)

Love just does that to you sometimes. Makes you love everything and anything about someone.

So, Wendy concluded, Irene loved Bo Gum. She laughed at his dumb jokes and touched his arm, smiling wide for his ego.

Wendy still couldn't shake the feeling that it was fake.

Irene was overcompensating, wasn't she? Putting up a front? Or maybe Wendy had just never noticed how touchy and laughy she was with Bo Gum? Maybe Wendy had just been living under a rock?

Conclusion unconcluded. Wendy needed to investigate.

 

"We... We're okay, right?"

Seulgi was standing by Irene's locker, dressed in her basketball uniform. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail, neatly pulled back and leaving her cheeks on display. Seulgi wore a black compression shirt and sleeves with elbow pads along with her maroon uniform shirt. Her shorts reached above knee length, the rest of her legs covered down to mid-shin by kneepads. Seulgi was clumsy and needed all the protection she could get. She leaned against the lockers and tapped the toe of her shoe restlessly against the floor.

"Yeah," Irene said without looking. "Of course."

"Are you sure?"

"Why wouldn't we be okay?" Irene faced Seulgi now with a confused expression on her face. Something about it made Seulgi's anger bubble.

"What do you  _mean_  'why wouldn't we be okay?'" Seulgi was fuming, but she was trying not to let it show. "You practically slapped my hand away when I was trying to wipe the milk from your chin."

Irene broke eye contact and began tying her shoes. "Startled me. That's all."

"No, it's not, Irene."

"Yes, it is, Seul."

"Did I do something?"

"Seulgi, please," Irene said, closing her locker with a sigh before turning to see Seulgi's downcast expression. Irene's heart physically hurt at the sight, but she couldn't bring herself to explain. "There are things I can't tell you."

"Can't tell me," Seulgi repeated.

"Yes. Please don't ask, okay?" Irene gave Seulgi's hand a squeeze. "Please?"

"Okay," Seulgi reluctantly said. She obviously wanted to know what was bothering Irene, but she wasn't going to pry. Irene's business was Irene's business. No one else's.

"Thanks, Seul."

Irene gave Seulgi a hug, breathing in Seulgi's signature scent and feeling the fabric of Seulgi's uniform underneath her fingertips. Irene never wanted to let go. Seulgi was so warm and comforting. Irene breathed a sigh of relief upon feeling Seulgi's arms draped over her shoulders, strong and secure. There were so many things Irene wanted to say, none of which she actually  _could_  say.

Coward.

"Seul- Oh, hi, Irene."

"YooA! Hey." Seulgi extracted herself from Irene's grip to please her tense girlfriend. YooA's sullen look did not go unnoticed.

"Your teammates were wondering where you were," YooA said to Seulgi, casting a sideways glance Irene's way. Irene pursed her lips and faced the other way, pretending to fiddle with her already-tied shoelaces.

"I'll be out, soon. Promise." Seulgi kissed YooA's cheek, lingering a tad too long for Irene's liking. Irene, of course, had snuck a glance. "Cheer for me from the stands, okay, baby?"

YooA tilted her head endearingly, patting the sides of Seulgi's collar down and smoothening out the uniform. She exhaled and pulled Seulgi down for an actual kiss.

"YooA..." Seulgi moved her head to the side, YooA's lips landing on her cheek, and pointed a thumb at Irene.

"Fine," YooA said after a moment. "I'll see you after the game. Plenty of time for kisses then."

"Lots," promised Seulgi.

Once YooA left, Irene finally stood up from where she had knelt tying and untying her shoes. "She didn't sound happy."

"You heard, huh?"

"Hard not to when I'm right here."

"Yeah, sorry about that."

"Hey, don't be sorry. Really, Seul. Don't be sorry. There's nothing to be sorry about." Irene stepped closer to Seulgi, who was pushing stray strands of hair out of her face. "You should've just kissed her."

"But..."

"If you're worried about me, don't be. It doesn't bother me."

On the contrary, it really did.

"Okay. If you say so." Seulgi didn't look or sound convinced.

"Your team is probably having a huddle right now, and you definitely don't have to keep me company any longer to calm my nerves. You'll be late."

"I can be late," Seulgi said quickly. "You're important to me, too. You  _and_  basketball."

"Ha, ha, Seulgi. Now  _go_. Your teammates are already out there."

"Okay, okay. I'll go." Seulgi dashed and disappeared around the corner before racing back to peak out from behind a wall. "Good luck cheering your first game, Irene."

"And good luck on your first game of the season, Seul."

Seulgi grinned widely at that, and Irene could hear the thumping of Seulgi's basketball sneakers on the floor as she sprinted out of the locker room. Irene smiled to herself and left the locker room soon after, making her way towards Yongsun. The stands were filling up as students filed through the doors, ready to watch the girls' team take on their first opponents. Irene felt jittery and nervous.

First game. Primetime for mistakes.

Irene huffed, and a hand clasped her shoulder from behind.

"You doing okay over here?"

"Hi, Yongsun. I'm doing... great."

Yongsun let out a hearty guffaw unlike any Irene had seen before. Damn.

"First game jitters, Irene. Perfectly normal."

"Is it that easy to tell?"

"You're practically ready to bounce through the roof."

Irene stopped bouncing on her heels with a bashful nod of acknowledgment. She watched the basketball team enter the gym to loud cheers. Seulgi waved to the crowd, Moonbyul right in front of her. Moonbyul looked their way and winked. Irene looked over at Yongsun, whose cheeks reddened every so slightly.

"She's very smooth."

"What are you talking about?" Yongsun asked defensively. She covered her face with a hand, her pompoms sitting in the crook of her elbow.

"You're red as a tomato."

"No, I am not!"

"If you say so."

"And I  _do_."

Yongsun stood up a little straighter and cleared her throat, realizing her attitude. Irene raised a brow, and Yongsun coughed what Irene was sure was a fake cough. 

"We better start hyping up the crowd, right?" Irene prodded.

"Y-yes! Great idea, Irene. Let's go."

Yongsun quickly strutted away, waving her pompoms in the air and drawing hype from the standing crowd. Loud cheers erupted from the people in the stands as Irene and the rest of the cheerleaders began a routine. They kicked their legs up and tapped their pompoms together. A couple of the girls did cartwheels while another couple did a flip. Irene joined in on the roundoffs, blowing the hair from her face as she landed on two feet and stood back up. Her hair had been neatly tied up with a sparkly maroon bow that matched the rest of the cheerleaders, but the momentum of her roundoff had caused a few strands to break free, falling into her face.

"Come on, Knights! Go out and play! We're going to beat some Wolves today!"

"Let's go, Knights! Let's go, team! Show them that we are supreme!"

_Bzzt!_

The buzzer went off, sending both teams scrambling back to their benches to bow their heads in a huddle, listening closely to their coach's instructions. Irene could recognize Seulgi's head poking out over her teammates, that blue scrunchie of hers holding her hair. Adorable bear.

After whatever it was that was happening -- Irene was busy paying attention to Seulgi -- the buzzer went off yet again.

"Team!" The Knights yelled, and the five starters stepped out onto the court.

The Knights lost the tipoff but quickly rebounded the ball after a lazy shot from the Wolves. Moonbyul sprinted down the court for an easy layup, cruising around the side of the court as she looped around and headed back on defense. Amber, a short-haired girl on the team, stole the ball and threw lobbied a pass at Seulgi, who caught the ball at the end of the court and tossed it up for a layup.

 _Easy game_ , Irene thought.

She thought wrong.

Four minutes on the clock had the team sweating and heaving for air, tired out from the exhausting game. The Wolves were running them up and down the court like dogs.

The score was 40 to 36.

The Knights had lost their twenty-point lead by the third quarter, the opponent vamping up their strategy and bringing the energy like they hadn't been the first half. Irene found herself waving her pompoms harder, desperate to rally the crowd and raise morale for the team. She caught Seulgi's eye, the taller girl sending Irene a tired smile. Irene gave her a thumbs up back, and Irene yelled towards the crowd.

"Go, Knights!" Irene yelled.

"I say, 'go,' you say, 'Knights!'" Yongsun shouted, hands in the air. "Go!"

"Knights!" The crowd chorused unanimously.

"Go!"

"Knights!"

Two minutes on the clock had Irene's heart beating out of her chest as she watched Seulgi get absolutely bulldozed. Seulgi flew back, skidding against the wooden floor. She quickly hopped up and stood at the free-throw line. She bent her knees and let the ball fly from her hands. Several girls surged forward and up for a rebound that never became because-

 _Swish_.

Thirty seconds on the clock had Irene screaming at the top of her lungs for the team to make just one more shot. Two points and the Knights would have a one-point lead; enough to win the game.

"Come on, Seulgi!"

"Moonbyul!"

"Knights!"

"Crush them!"

Moonbyul threw the ball up for a three-pointer, sending the crowd rioting. The XX Knights had a two-point lead, but was it enough? With twenty seconds left, the other team matched Moonbyul's shot to pull ahead with one-point.

"Ten seconds left! You can do it!"

Screaming, screaming, screaming. All Irene could hear was screaming. She was screaming, too, her voice lost in the sea of cheers that resounded throughout the gym. Seulgi dashed past a defender to go up for a layup, her path clear, when someone from the other team sprinted forward and jumped with Seulgi, slapping the ball out of the air.

 _Bzzt_. Game over.

"Good game, Seul," Irene said to her friend, who replied with a lopsided half-smile.

"Thanks, Irene."

"No, really. I mean it. You looked so cool."

Irene wished she could shut up, but Seulgi laughed. It was worth seeing Seulgi laugh.

"Hey, Seul, do you-"

"Babe!" YooA linked arms with Seulgi and kissed the bear-like girl on the cheek.

"Nice to see you, too," Seulgi said with a laugh. "I'm all sweaty."

"I don't care," YooA said adamantly. "I still like you."

"Thanks for the reassurance."

"Irene?"

"Wendy?"

Wendy came walking up in her team tracksuit, yanked over her uniform, looking just as sweaty as Seulgi. Actually, scratch that. Seulgi was way more sweaty. Seulgi sweat so much that she looked like a fountain. She still looked like a fountain as YooA led her away, their laughing blending into the background as they grew further away.

"Did you like the game?" Wendy asked awkwardly. She wanted to get straight to the point, but she didn't want to attack Irene.

"Yeah! It was really exciting, and cheering is actually kind of fun. Should've taken Yongsun up on her offer long ago."

"What offer?"

"She's told me before that I should join the squad," explained Irene, "but I never said yes until this winter season."

"Ah."

"Yup. So, what's up?"

Wendy examined Irene's curious face, missing the scene of Seulgi and YooA just over her shoulder and looking for any sort of discomfort. Seulgi and YooA made their way towards the gym doors, off to do whatever, and Wendy stared a little harder. Irene looked pretty not-guilty, in Wendy's opinion. Irene waved a hand in front of Wendy's face.

"Hello? Earth to Wendy?"

"Are you cheating on Bo Gum?" Wendy blurted out.

" _What_?"

"Are... Are you cheating on Bo Gum?"

"Keep it down, would you?!" Irene squeaked.

She grabbed tight onto Wendy's arm and dragged the girl somewhere private so no one could hear them. Once out of earshot, Irene glared at Wendy, who now sheepishly avoided Irene's eyes. Irene took a deep breath and released Wendy's arm. Wendy rubbed the assaulted spot. Irene's grip was hella hard.

"What the hell, Wendy? You want the whole school to think I'm... I'm cheating?"

"N-no, but-"

"But what, Wendy? You couldn't have pulled me aside to ask instead of letting everyone in the gym know?"

"I'm sorry, Irene. I really am. I just wasn't thinking-"

"Yeah, you weren't."

Irene felt like her insides were churning up the same way food does in a processor. Her fingertips felt tingly, and her mind felt hazy. If the school heard rumors about her cheating, what if people found out about Seulgi? What if they found out about her crush? What if they found out she wasn't so straight after all? What would people do when their Class President Irene Bae was being a whore behind all their backs? Maybe not a whore. That was a little harsh. But still! People would form all _sorts_ of opinions that would be out of Irene's control. The idea of that was scary...

"Irene."

"What."

"I'm sorry."

Irene sighed and closed her eyes for a few long moments, trying to calm down.

"Irene, really. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Wendy. Just..."

"What is it?"

"Forget it. Why did you ask if I was cheating? Are people saying things about me? Who told you anything?"

"Nobody. Nobody did."

"Then why did you ask?"

Wendy hesitated. "You asked me the other day about that theoretical situation."

"Yeah, and?"

"What do you mean, 'and'? I know that you were talking about yourself, Irene. I know the girl is you."

"...No."

"You're not that great of a liar, Irene. Never have been."

 _If only you knew the lies I've been living. Everything is a lie_.

"It's none of your business."

"You're my friend, Irene. If it's affecting you this much, then I want to help."

"You  _can't_ , Wendy. Not everything is so easy."

"You ever think that maybe you're just making it hard? Maybe it's easier than you think."

Irene snorted. "Trust me, Wendy. It's hard."

"I still want to help you."

"And I'm telling you that you can't."

"But I can try."

"Are you always this stubborn?"

"When I want to be."

Wendy's toothy grin made Irene smile back, but Irene's heart felt heavy. She wasn't ready to tell Wendy any of the details. Not yet. But maybe it wouldn't hurt to tell a little bit. After all, when Irene thought back on it, she'd asked Wendy about the not-so-theoretical situation because Wendy was trustworthy. Wendy was someone she could rely on.

(Could Wendy say the same back?)

"I think I don't like Bo Gum anymore."

To Wendy's credit, her eyebrows didn't shoot off her face in surprise, and she instead nodded and gave Irene a supportive pat on the back.

"What makes you say 'think'?"

"I... I still have some feelings, but they aren't as strong as they were before. They're fading, I guess, but I still like him. Love him. But I think it's friend love? He's so kind and nice, and wonderful, and everything that a girl could possibly ever want in a boyfriend, but I don't want a boyfriend, Wendy, I want-"

Irene stopped herself from saying more and left the sentence dangling in the air. Wendy just stood there in silent shock. Was Irene about to say what Wendy thought she was going to say?

"...I don't even know what I want."  _Lies_.

"It sounds like you're just going to make things harder for yourself if you keep dating Bo Gum," Wendy said gently. "If your feelings aren't as strong as his, then you're just going to lead him on..."

"I know, Wendy, but it's just so  _hard_. I don't want to hurt him. Knowing him, he'll play it off all kind and continue being amazing, but it'll hurt him."

"You can't save everyone's feelings. Maybe you should start thinking about your own, for once."

"I think I already do that too much, Wendy." Irene laughed darkly. "I'm already pretty selfish."

"Don't say that."

"I am selfish. It's true. I've been using Bo Gum for a month or whatever now, haven't I? I've known for a bit that the feelings have faded, yet I continue to stay by his side, taking advantage of his unconditional love. He's too good for me."

"No. That's not true."

"Yes, it is. This is the kind of person I am." Irene sighed and began taking her hair out of its high ponytail. She shook it out, letting the waves fall down, and let the ribbon drape itself over her fingers. "I ignored you guys, didn't I? I ignored you guys, ignored Seulgi, and then I saw. I saw, Wendy. I saw just exactly what I had been doing with Bo Gum because Seulgi did the same thing dating YooA, but Seulgi's better than me. Seulgi makes the time."

 _Seulgi, huh?_ Wendy thought to herself sadly. _Guess it's never about me_.

"Wendy? What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing."

"...Okay."

"If you want to be a good person, Irene, then you should start now," said Wendy firmly. "Break up with him. Don't play with his heart like this."

"I-I will. I will. I will."

"Good."

The two stood there for a moment in silence, fumbling for words to say. Wendy spoke first, posing the question that had been dwelling in her mind for quite a while now.

"Can I ask you something, Irene?"

"Sure. Shoot."

"Who's the third person? The crush?"

Irene just looked at Wendy, who then said, "Okay, uh, nevermind."

"No, it's fine. I just don't think I'm ready to tell yet."

"Okay. If you ever need to talk to someone, you can talk to me, and-"

"Seungwan, can I trust you?"

The intensity of Irene's gaze made Wendy want to shrink up into a ball and hide. Irene was scarily serious with her straight face and eyes glued to Wendy's. Wendy didn't know what Irene was looking for, so Wendy just answered as honestly as possible.

"With your life."

Okay, Wendy. Maybe a bit too dramatic. Nobody was dying here. (Right?)

"Irene, if you aren't ready to tell, you really don't have to."

"I don't know. I feel like I should tell. Maybe I shouldn't. Maybe I should?"

"Irene," Wendy tried to interrupt. Irene looked like she was spiraling with her thoughts. "Don't overthink this too hard. It's getting to you."

"I just feel like, I don't know, scared, I guess." Irene stopped fiddling with her fingers and pressed her lips in a thin line.

"Why are you scared?" Wendy asked softly, taking ahold of one of Irene's hands.

"I..." Irene looked around anxiously. She felt like she was going to cry.

Wendy was trustworthy, right? Wendy was someone who Irene could trust. Irene knew she was. This was  _Wendy_  she was talking about. Wendy was such an amazing friend, even if Irene didn't always tell her so, and Irene was sure that Wendy wouldn't tell anyone. Or Seulgi. That was the main issue. Wendy couldn't tell Seulgi.

Irene's palms felt clammy. She didn't know why she was this nervous. She hadn't even revealed anything about Seulgi, yet she already felt like she might collapse on the spot. She felt small under Wendy's worried gaze, despite the kind demeanor. Wendy didn't seem intimidating, but, well, everything did. The weight of Irene's feelings began collapsing in on her, holding her down in a trap with no escape, Wendy extending a hand to help her if only Irene could take that one step and bridge the gap.

Seulgi. Irene liked Seulgi.

Loved? Maybe. But for now, liked.

If this was love, then Irene was in for a hell of a ride, and she didn't want to think about that yet. Not yet.

What was Irene going to tell people?

_Hi, everyone! I'm actually not straight, am not in love with my boyfriend anymore, and might be in love with my best friend whose girlfriend I kind of hate!_

Irene took a deep breath. When she looked in Wendy's eyes, she saw no judgment; only caring. This was someone she could tell. This was someone who would support her unconditionally, stay by her side, and help her. 

Right?

Ugh. Why were feelings so complicated?

Irene opened her mouth and closed it again. She wanted the words to come out, but instead, she looked like an out-of-operation toy, trying to make conversation and failing miserably because surprise, her voice was failing her just like how she was failing Bo Gum.

Bo Gum.

She had a boyfriend but she also had a crush. On someone taken. A girl.

Irene was a girl. Seulgi was a girl. They were _both_ girls.

Gay. No, bisexual. That's what those online tests had said, right? Bisexual.

"I want to tell you, Wendy," Irene said in a small voice, lip trembling. "The words won't come."

"Take all the time you need," said Wendy, eyebrows knit with concern. "All the time you need."

An involuntary shiver ran down Irene's spine. Time. She knew that the longer she waited, the messier this would become. Ten minutes was how long Irene took to respond to Wendy. Irene breathed in deep and exhaled slowly, willing the words to just  _come_  and for her tears to not, when suddenly-

"I like Seulgi."

Welp. There it was.

Irene couldn't believe she had said it. Just like that. In three words, in the blink of an eye, Irene had revealed her deepest secret to Wendy Son, one of her dearest friends. Irene felt her chest tighten as she waited for Wendy's response.

"Like...  _like_  like? Or-"

" _Like_  like."

"Oh." Wendy's face screwed up in contemplation for a moment, and Irene couldn't tell how Wendy was taking this. " _Oh_."

"Yeah."

"Oh."

"You've said."

"Right. Sorry. Uh... Wow."

Wendy was shocked, to say the least. She couldn't wrap her mind around what was happening. Straight Irene,  _very_ straight Irene, was  _not_  straight Irene. She was, instead, Wendy supposed, bisexual Irene. And she liked Seulgi? Seulgi Kang? Irene had a crush on  _Seulgi?_

"Is that why you hate YooA so much?" Wendy had to ask.

"No," Irene said with crossed arms. After a knowing look from Wendy, Irene huffed. "Maybe."

"Does this mean you're bi?"

"I guess so. I mean, Seulgi's the first girl crush I've had, but..."

"Have you known this for a while?" Wendy didn't want to press Irene too hard, but she also didn't want to just drop the subject. It must've been incredibly hard for Irene to even tell Wendy anything. Nevertheless, Wendy couldn't help it. She was curious.

"Not that long," Irene confessed and sniffled. She didn't know why she was still about to borderline cry. "But long enough."

"Does... anybody else know?"

"No," Irene shook her head. "Just you."

Wendy smiled a little at that. First for once. "Thank you for trusting me."

"Are we still friends?" Irene asked tentatively, bracing herself.

"What? Of course, we are. What are you talking about?"

"I don't know. I just had to ask."

"Irene," Wendy put a hand on the girl's shoulder, "you're one of the best friends I have. Nothing will ever change that. Seriously. Okay?"

Wendy was so earnest that Irene couldn't hold back a smile, and she unclenched one fist that she had subconsciously made earlier, her nails leaving indents in her palm. Irene felt a pang of sadness thinking about Seulgi (and Bo Gum), but she felt something else, too. Free. Irene felt free, and she felt accepted. She felt Wendy's unchanging, unconditional love, and she wondered what she did in a past life to deserve it.

Then the tears flowed.

Tears for her past, tears for her future. Tears for what would never happen and tears for everything that had. She cried tears for ignorance, tears for mistakes, and tears for the love that Wendy had so wonderfully given, just the way Irene needed it. It all came at once, and Irene was overwhelmed. Happiness and sadness and anger.

Everything came and went just like that.

Irene silently mourned the way life had been before she had a crush on Seulgi. Simpler times, yes, but did she regret having a crush on Seulgi? Irene found herself surprisingly thinking no. Despite the cumbersome weight of it all, Irene regretted nothing. A lot of good things had come about in its wake. Wasn't there some saying about getting through the bad in order to get to the good? Irene felt like there was, but she couldn't think of it. That saying was exactly what she was going through, and she hoped and hoped and hoped that this meant somewhere down the line, she would see the good. At the same time, maybe she was already seeing it, standing before her in the form of her good friend Wendy.

She would never take Wendy for granted ever again. Bless Wendy and her existence.

When Wendy's arms encircled her for a comforting hug, Irene let her body go limp, and she cried into Wendy's shoulder. She cried thinking of all the times she hadn't been there for Wendy, Seulgi, Joy, and Yeri; times where she'd been with Bo Gum when in the end, he was not the one she would keep by her side. Irene cried thinking of the time Seulgi had come out, and Irene had left her feeling alone and unaccepted, shunned by the one who was supposed to be her best friend; someone who countlessly chose a boy because "love was love" and the heart wants what it wants.

But now the heart wants Seulgi.

Time after time of casting Seulgi aside, and now she's all Irene wants.

After the bad, comes the good.

Irene thought maybe for Seulgi, the bad was Irene, and the good was YooA. As unpleasant the thought was, guilt seeping in with every passing moment, Irene was glad that things were looking up for Seulgi. Yeah, Irene wished Seulgi could be hers, and yeah, Irene was pretty sure YooA had some hidden motive or  _something_  to her, but Seulgi was happy. That had to count for something.

Still. Karma's a bitch.

Seulgi might be happy, but karma's still a bitch.

Irene sniffled and tried to take deeper breaths to calm her beating heart, and she listened as best she could to Wendy's reassurances, Wendy's hand rubbing her back. Wendy told her it'd be okay, and Irene knew it would be. Good after the bad.

Good after the bad.

Irene finally pulled away from Wendy and wiped her face with the back of her hand. "Sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it," Wendy said, looking at the wet patch, a mix of salty tears and snot, on her uniform. "Next game isn't for a couple of days, anyway."

"I'm really glad you're my friend."

Wendy milked every bit of sincerity from Irene's words and stored it away for the days she felt underappreciated. Despite the times when Irene did this or that, Wendy reminded herself, Irene was still her friend. Irene still cared. And better late than never, anyway.

So Wendy mustered up every bit of her own sincerity, presenting it to Irene carefully and deliberately, watching the girl's face light up.

"I'm really glad you're my friend, too."

Irene checked her phone and widened her eyes. "Oh, shit. I have to head home. My parents are waiting outside. They've been waiting like twenty minutes." Irene cursed again under her breath and shoved her phone in her pocket and said, "Thanks for listening, Wendy. I really appreciate it."

"Of course. Anytime."

Irene gave Wendy a quick hug. "I'll see you later, Wendy."

"See you."

"Dad, I'm coming, seriously..."

Once Irene had dashed off with her phone to her ear, attempting to appease her parents as she grabbed her things, Wendy made her way back towards the gym and asked, "Wait for me long?"

"You're lucky I'm still here," Eunji said, pushing herself off where she leaned on the wall, pretending to be angry as she pouted. "I was about to leave."

"And deprive yourself of my presence?"

"Aren't you a cocky one."

"I am, aren't I?"

Eunji rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Amazing."

Wendy just grinned. "I know."

"Oh, come on," said Eunji as she tugged Wendy by the arm. "Let's go on our study date already."

"So that's what this is? A date?" Wendy waggled her eyebrows, making Eunji laugh a full-bodied laugh that Wendy never wanted to stop hearing.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Eunji teased back. "Come on, Wendy."

"Alright, alright. Anything you want."

"Good, because what I want," Eunji started walking away, "is get a move on."

"Aye aye, captain."

Wendy saluted and Eunji dashed back to give her a playful shove before pushing her towards the exit.

"Just shut up and drive."

Wendy decided to oblige with Eunji's demand and stop talking. She listened contently as Eunji talked about something that had happened in the hall earlier as they walked to the car. Something about Kai doing something really stupid and Wendy thought she heard Eunji say he'd gone to the nurse with a bloodied nose. Luckily, Kai hadn't done any serious damage, but hopefully, he wouldn't go and do something else that  _would_  cause serious damage. Geez, that kid.

When the two reached Wendy's car, they tossed their backpacks (and Wendy's duffle bag) in the trunk. Wendy opened the passenger door for Eunji with an exaggerated bow, earning an exaggerated curtsy in return alongside a wide, wonderful smile, and Wendy felt warm despite the lingering chill of the autumn weather that left her skin feeling cool to the touch as she sat in the driver's seat. She handed Eunji a blanket that was kept in the backseat in case of weather like this, and she waited for the car to heat up some more before turning the heater. If you turn it on too early, you just get blasted with cold air, and Wendy wanted Eunji to be as comfortable as possible.

"Ready to go?" Wendy asked, ready to pull out of the parking spot.

"Ready if you are," said Eunji, who then flashed that smile of hers that never failed to make Wendy's breath catch in her throat because girlfriend material is what Eunji was.

Girlfriend material all the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! This update is over 7000 words, which is more than double my usual updates, so hope you guys like it! I know I said I would develop Joyri more, since nothing has really happened in that department, but looks like that won't be happening this chapter. Instead, Wenji got a moment and there's been some character development with Irene, meaning that a step forward for Seulrene and for the Wenrene friendship. Also, peep Moonsun.
> 
> Make sure to leave a comment, because I love hearing your feedback, and don't forget to follow my Twitter/Tumblr @sagwalli.
> 
> Thanks for reading! See you in the next update.


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